Chapter XXIII

"Right... She has thalassophobia... I didn't know she had a phobia under the water... I would have known, Schneizel, but I didn't! She freaking kept it... Don't fucking yell at me, you fucktard!"

I groaned, yawning so loud as I rubbed my eyes from the loud voice of my boss. Why was he yelling all of a sudden?

"Wait... She's waking up. I'll hang up now. Thanks to you, you fucking bastard."

"Sir Sebastian...?" I mindlessly called his name, half-awake. "What's with the loud voice? Are you arguing with someone?" I rubbed my eyes.

"Y-Yeah. A colleague of mine. He is a damn freaking bastard..." He hissed.

While rubbing my eyes and getting up, I felt the side of my bed sunken. I slowly peeled my eyes open. I was taken aback when I realized his face was too close to me. And why was he so close right now? To think that his presence was overwhelming me right now.

"Uh... Y-You're a bit too close, sir," I said, a bit embarrassed.

"Oh. Sorry." He immediately stood up. Then he cleared his throat. "H-How's your nap?"

I stretched my arms, feeling refreshed. "I am good." I smiled, sitting on the edge of the bed. I reached for my phone and gasped when I saw that it was almost 5 PM. "Shit." I immediately stood up, looking at Sir Sebastian. "H-Have you eaten your lunch and snacks, Sir Sebastian?" We arrived by 10 AM after the unfortunate event for scuba diving.

It was supposed to be a nap but why did I sleep as if I had awakened myself for the whole night and chose to sleep during the day?

I blinked when Sebastian placed his hand on top of my head. "You worry too much about my welfare, Cejay. Were you supposed to worry about yours?" He caressed my hair. "Let's go out and have our early dinner."

"Can I not change my clothes?" I asked, eyeing down on my pajamas after I went to the comfort room to wash my face.

He scoffed. An amusement smile plastered on his lips. "Of course. I don't mind. Come," he said and offered his hand to me.

I blinked, staring at his hand. Should I accept it? Would it be weird if I am holding my boss's hand?

"Let's go."

Before I could even react, he was the one who took my hand and wrapped his hand with mine. I just let him take over and gently pulled me. He released my hand when he got to decide where to eat.

We peacefully ended our early dinner. We took a stroll around. Then we decided to stay on the beach until the sun went down. I sat on the sand, which is the same goes with him.

"Since when did you have a phobia in the deep shallows of underwater?"

I glanced at him from his sudden question. I didn't even get a chance to enjoy the horizon of the sea yet he already asked for it.

"Uh..." I pursed my lips into a thin line. "I..." I sighed, thinking how I was supposed to give him an answer. "I don't really want to talk about it..." I folded my knees and placed my chin on top of it.

"I see. It's fine."

"Are you still mad, Sebastian?" I turned my head so I could see his reaction.

His expression was still plain and neutral. His eyes were glued to the sea. "What makes you think I am still mad?"

"Because I became stupid? Perhaps it is your first time dealing with a problematic personal assistant? And that I became a burden on you?"

He huffed, chuckling. His ocean blue eyes settled on me. "You seem to like jumping into a conclusion, Cejay."

I frowned a little. "Then why can't you answer me?"

He gave me a look like do I look serious with my question? I just raised my brow, waiting for real judgment. Instead, he just patted my head then settled it to my cheek that made my heart jump.

"I'm just worried." He sighed and removed his hand from my cheek. Then he focused his eyes on the sea.

"Thank you, sir." Sighing, I tapped his shoulder.

"For what?"

"For taking care of me. I thought you were just grumpy and strict before but in the year I worked with you, my standpoint has changed." I shrugged my shoulders. I started drawing irregular circles in the sand.

I heard his hearty laugh. "Should I be offended or be joyful at your commentary?"

"Depends on your understanding." I shrugged, chuckling. I laid down in the sand and looked up at the orange hue sky. The sun is setting down. It was one of the best moments I enjoyed every time I visited a beach. "Hey, Sebastian."

"Hmm?"

"I remember what you said days ago. About your first love," I paused and looked at him.

I saw his shoulders stiffened. Then he slowly turned his head at me. "What about her?" His tone changed into something serious.

I blinked and averted my eyes a little before I returned my gaze to him. "Do I know her? Do I know your first love? I mean, have I met her?"

A sly smile curled into his lips. "Why? Are you curious about her?"

"Um..." I paused and didn't know what to say next. "I-I guess. It's just that... I rarely get to know that you have someone you like."

"I don't like her." He scoffed.

"Huh?" What the heck is he saying? She didn't like her? I am confused by Sebastian's words.

Sebastian slightly twisted his body so he could look at me. "I love her, not like, you silly woman. I have loved her for a very long time."

"Long time? How long is that?" I blinked and got up. Curiosity got the best of me.

"Sixteen years."

"What?!" I exclaimed in surprise, wide-eyed from his words. "Sixteen years?! That long?!"

Sebastian nodded and smiled amusingly at my outburst. "Yes, Cejay. That long."

"Wow..." Blinking, I returned my gaze to the sea, contemplating shortly. "You should have confessed! I'm sure the woman you love would be shocked!"

He chuckled slowly. "If for example..." he paused then continued. "A man has confessed to you that he has loved you for more than fifteen years, what will be your reaction?"

"Me?" I pointed to myself. "It's not like there will be someone who will even dare—"

"I am setting an example, Cejay."

"Oh." That shut me up. "Example," I said, smiling wryly.

Sebastian nodded. "Yes. What will be your reaction then?" he asked. His tone sounded hopeful.

"Um..." I scratched my nape, not knowing what to reply to my boss. "I guess, I will be shocked... and..." I twitched my lips, thinking of myself having a man confessing that he had loved me for a long time. "Then I will find it weird."

"Why?" His brows furrowed in bewilderment.

I shrugged. "I don't know." I lowered my gaze to the irregular shapes I drew earlier. "I am not that likable so why would a man even dare to love me that long? Like how did his feelings develop towards me? Did he love me only because of my beauty outside? I don't know how to deal with a guy who is interested in me. What I do is shut them out of my life." Sighing, I remember how many times I rejected guys who asked me for a date. I didn't hear a response from Sebastian so I glanced up to see his eyes. "Is there something wrong?"

He blinked and shook his head. "No... Nothing." He shook his head again and avoided my gaze. "Won't you find it creepy if you get to know that man knows everything about you? Like he knows where you studied, where you worked, he even knew what you are doing at your home—"

"Of course, I will find it creepy! Geez! What kind of question is that, Sebastian?" I immediately brushed my hands up and down to my arms. "I really hope you are not doing that to the woman you love. That will creep her out. I told you."

"I-I don't d-do that," Sebastian said defensively.

"Good." I nodded my head, approving that he didn't do anything sort of thing.

"What if..." I looked at him, waiting for his next question. "What if that man loves you because of your flaws and kindness from the very start? He found it beautiful, that is why he fell so hard to you?"

I creased my forehead. "Um..." I nipped my chin. "I am not... sure. Maybe I will still freak out... Not sure though." I shrugged. "I don't know how to deal guys with that kind of thinking."

"I see." He kept nodding his head.

"When will you confess then? Is she still single?"

"Of course. Until now she is still single." A smirk curled upon his lips. "She must be still single until I decide to confess my feelings for her. That is why I interfere with her past dates so she will not be dating any man aside from me."

"What? You interfere with her past dates?" I looked at him weirdly.

He nodded proudly. That made me want to widen my eyes. He really did that? Wow!

"You should get to confess and don't make her wait for too long," I suggested even though his action creeped me out but I knew he was only doing this because he loves her.

Love could make you do indecisive, impulsive, and stupid actions. But they said it was a good feeling. I have never experienced them because I always fucked up with my dates before. That is why I never wanted to go on a date unless it is necessary.

Like my dad would force me to set up with any guy I had never met.

"Don't worry, Cejay. She will know it soon. Once she knows it, I am not going to let her go ever again," he said those meaningful words while staring intently into my eyes. A condescending smile plastered on his lips after that. "I just hope she prepares herself for it."

He stood up and started walking away with a relief sigh I heard from him. I could sense the confidence in him like Sebastian could make that woman his.

I don't know if I should be creeping out from it or not.