The Past

Akshay:

I was playing with Abhaya and Kalki. Netra returned to the home as per her usual timings. She started preparing the dinner. I guess this devil's mind is calm today. Otherwise she disturbs everyone with her idiotic moodswings.

I observed Kalki thinking deeply.

"Kalki, what happened to you? Why are dull today?" I asked.

Kalki didn't speak. I took Kalki onto my lap.

"Tell me my son, what happened to you?"

"Papa, We don't feel good these days. You and mumma were fighting always," Kalki said and Netra looked at me.

"No, Kalki. We are not fighting," Netra tried to persuade him.

"No, mumma. Even in the morning I saw dad sleeping on sofa and not in the room. You too scolded me asking me to stay away from papa," Abhaya said this time.

Netra gulped observing my face changing to rude one.

"Abhaya, actually mumma was stuck in an issue. She tried to hide it from me. But now everything is clear, so no problem," I said.

"Mumma, why did you try to hide it from papa? Papa solves every problem. Don't do it again," Kalki said and Netra nodded.

Netra arranged the dinner and came to me.

"Akshay, dinner is ready," Netra said.

"I am not hungry," I said.

"But why?" Netra asked me.

"Netra, I know how much the kids get effected by the conflicts between mom and dad. I am an example for that and I don't want my children to face the same fate as me. Today they understood that we are not at good terms and became dull.

Netra, if this happens one more time, I will really turn into the past Akshay and then you know what happens. Don't misuse the freedom and love which I am giving to you," I said and Netra nodded.

"Come for the dinner or Kalki and Abhaya may get doubt again," Netra said.

I went to the dining table and started my dinner. I observed Netra serving us but didn't have her dinner.

"Netra, you too join us," I said.

"I will eat later," Netra said.

"What happened to you?" I asked and she stayed quiet.

I glared at her.

"Dad, mom's hand got hurt. I saw when she is preparing the dinner with pain. She told me not to tell you," Abhaya said.

"Sit here," I said and Netra sat beside me. I held her hand to see what happened to her. I thought something happened while cooking but now I understood it's a belt mark. I stared at her blankly.

"How? I didn't hit you," I said almost being in tears.

"When you hit the wall with the belt in anger, it hit my palm and you didn't observe," Netra said.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I know you didn't do intentionally. I don't want you to get hurt, Akshay. It's not your mistake."

"Why and how did you cook with this hand?"

"You love to eat the food prepared by me. So, I did it."

I kissed her palm. I fed her the food along with my kids. After the dinner, we went to the room. I applied pain relief gel to her hand.

"I am sorry," I said to her.

"It's not your mistake, Akshay," Netra said.

"I feel sorry for my behaviour with you in the past," I said.

"That's past and it's over. Now be calm," Netra said, keeping her forefinger on my lips.

"I shouldn't have behaved so cruelly with you," I said.

"It's not you. It's your past that made you do so," Netra said hugging me and caressing my hairs.

"Akshay, it's you who rescued me and gave a new life to me. If you were not there, this Netra would have dead long before," Netra said.

"Netra, don't talk like that. I will always be there to save you," I said, kissing her palm.

"I know," Netra said.

"But I...." Before I complete, Netra kissed my lips. She kissed me deeply and slowly unbuttoned my shirt throwing it away. She moved her hands on my bare chest igniting the feelings of desire in me. I threw her on the bed and went top of her.

Netra smiled and bit the corner of her lip making me go crazy. I buried my head in her neck and kissed her.

"You are something which I can't resist," I said.

I inhaled her fragrance which make my heart swing in the wave of love. Love making is not something that unites two bodies with no sense. For me, it's not a need that need to be fulfilled for satisfying my body. Not for producing a heir.

Love making is divine and sacred to me. When my heart understood Netra so well and love her thoughts, ideals, goals, soul, heart and then her body, I want to make love to her to make her realise how much I love her. Her mere presence makes me feel serene. Her breath, her fragrance, her touch, her voice everything sends me into another world where love and peace exists forever.

Kissing her is not just touching her with my lips. For me, Kiss is something that says how much I adore her and crazy in her love. I kissed her hand first on our first night to promise her that I would never leave her hand ever. Locking her lips means saying her that I can understand you without a word and your silence also expresses many emotions to me. Kissing her entirely is another way of expressing my love to her. Entering her is to confirm her that we both are one forever and nothing can separate us.

Her moans and calling my name shows how much Netra loves me. When she responds to me for everything I do clearly makes me understand that she feels pleasure in becoming mine. I don't make love to her everyday as a duty or need but just does it when my heart feels she is all mine. And before asking her I love to confirm that she is ready for it in all means. In our relationship, it's not just me who asks for love making but also Netra asks for it when she wants me. Sometimes we do to heal the pain in the heart of one another and to assure we are there for each other. Whatever we both should enjoy it and feel the happiness.

We had three sessions in a row and I stopped pulling her closer to me. Netra kissed on my bare chest to which I smiled.

"I love you, Akki," Netra said, spoiling my mood and remembering me many nightmares.

"It's Akshay, not Akki," I said in a severe tone.

"Akki, I love you," Netra said and kissed me again.