Chapter 43

Candice
A ripple of anger and fear courses through my body. I never should have found this man last year. He has done nothing but cause pain in my life. I hate him with every fiber of my soul and as Austin gives me a worried look, I wonder if Nicholas has ruined any chance I may have had at happily ever after.
"Babe? Did you hear me?" Austin says.
"Wh-what?"
"I asked if you were alright? You looked like you saw a ghost." God, why does he have to be so perfect. As soon as I tell him who I really am, I'm going to lose him, and I've only just gotten him.
"Oh, um nothing. The name sounds familiar is all. What's he do?" I ask, even though I already know. Fucking small world.
"Yeah, should sound familiar, he owns half of New York. He is a business mogul and has his own a construction company. Cole industries. That's one of his faces anyway. The other face is a drug typhoon. He controls most of the heroin coming in, uses the company to conceal it. My father used to work for him. Our club would distribute and pick it up for him, among other things. Snake's club did too. That's why there was so much blood shed on both sides. Wasn't until I stepped up and told Cole I no longer wanted his business did the blood shed stop. That's why I'm so damn confused on why he is trying to set us up." Austin explains.
It doesn't make any sense. If Austin told him that his club was done with all that shit, then surely, he would be fine having only one MC to turn to. More profit and all that. Listen to me, it's like I'm caught up in a mafia movie. Austin unravels his food and the motion causes me to do the same. We eat in silence, but I can see Austin glance at me every few seconds, probably wondering why I went from telling him I care for him to acting like a manikin.
"So, Max and you seem to be close." I say, hoping a conversation will distract me from my thoughts. I can't tell Austin about my father. Especially not now.
"Yeah, we're only three years apart. We grew up together. Mom always made sure we stayed close. What about you? Your mom ever get with a guy with kids of his own?" He asks.
I have always hated this question. It's not like I never wondered what it would be like to have siblings, I accepted the fact that I was an only child early on. What always hurt, was the fact that I always felt like mom couldn't have any more children because of me. She never got her happily ever after because of me. She could have met a nice man, gotten married and been a mother to his children. Me being here, that prevented her from having the life she deserved.
"No, it's always just been me. Mom got pregnant with me when she was twenty-five. She was in college, so she had to quit school and get a second job in order to afford everything. She worked so hard for us, but it wasn't always enough. She avoided any guys that had kids. We struggled for a long time." I say then shake my head when I see his face envelop sympathy. I hate sympathy.
"So, your mother is close with you boys?" I ask hoping this will take the conversation off of me.
"Yeah, she is like our best friend. She always seems to calm me down and she knows me like the back of her hand. Mom didn't have the best life growing up, her father used to beat her and her mother when she was young, and it made her clasp onto whoever showed her attention when she got older. My father was that man. After she had us, she made sure we always treated women like they should be, like treasures."
My eyes get a little moist at his mother's story. If it weren't for seeing my mother and grandmother as independents women, I don't know where I would be. The guys I selected to be with in my past never measured up to me, but I often wonder if part of me was just afraid to give my heart to someone.
"Your mother sounds like an amazing woman Austin."
"Kind of like yours." He says finishing up his pasta.
I stand and walk over to the fridge to get a couple of water bottles for us. When I walk back over, Austin is staring at me, waiting for me to explain my apprehension about his comment towards my mother.
"My mom is amazing." I start with a loud sigh. "I know she kind of gave you hell yesterday. She is normally not so rude. We've had a rough year or so and she is still struggling a little."
"This have anything to do with her limp?" Austin asks nonchalantly.
I nod my answer and he waits for me to explain. I have told people, namely Ben and Lyla, what my mother has been through, and that was only because I needed time off and they needed to know why but other than that I try not to share my mother's injury with too many people. I know without a doubt that Austin will support me whether I choose to tell him or not but something in me wants to be honest with him. Well, at least about this.
"I told you about how my mom struggled financially when I was younger. Well, after my grandfather died, it got worse. My grandfather would help out when he could, but when he passed away, it stopped. My grandmother had to pay off a lot of my grandfather's debt and her house was falling apart, so we moved back in with her and struggled together. My mom's dream was to eventually own her own restaurant, but because she didn't have the money she was stuck just managing one."
I look up to Austin to see him staring into my eyes waiting for me to continue.
"With us living with my grandmother, my mother was able to start saving some money. She was going to use it for a down payment for her own restaurant. One day my grandmother came home, hollering about a lottery ticket. She had won, she actually won the damn lottery." I say with a smile. I remember that day like it was yesterday, things were finally looking up for our family.
"My grandmother paid off all my grandfather's debt, fixed up her house, and gave my mother some money to set aside. The very next day, my mother went into work and found out that her boss had passed away in her sleep the night before. In the will, she had left my mother the restaurant. My mother and her were close, so it was as a shock for her to find she always had heart complications. My mother gladly accepted the restaurant, so the remaining money that she had, she gave to me. I was able to go to nursing school because of it, and accomplish my dream."
The next part I have to say is what is going to push me over the edge. My mother changed so drastically.
"Last year, my mother's café caught on fire. The fire department and investigators labeled it arson. My mother suffered third degree burns on her thigh and leg on her left side. She needed several surgeries and lots of physical therapy. Because the incident was considered arson, my mother's insurance company was not paying for it. She had lost everything in one day. She had no money left over from my schooling to pay for the repairs or to help with physical therapy. Now she lives with me, can't work because of her injury, and is completely depressed."
I take a deep breath and let the tears flow. I haven't cried for my mother in a while. I always felt it was my fault she couldn't afford to repair her restaurant. We drive past the restaurant every time we go to her physical therapist and I can tell from the look she gives me that she really blames me for everything. I know my mother loves me, but I also know I took away her dreams, and not for the first time.
"Babe, you know none of that shit is your fault, right? Shit happens. There is nothing you can do but be there or her. Your mother may have been a little hard on you when it came to me, but I can tell that was out of love. She doesn't blame you for what happened." Austin says.
I just shake my head at him while quickly wiping my tears. He doesn't understand. Nobody does. I am to blame for my mother's restaurant. No, I didn't physically do anything, but I also chose a very expensive school to go to. My dream came true while hers went up in flames.
"Alright, no more family talk. Let's go watch a movie or something. I need to make some phone calls and check in with the boys. You pick out the movie and pop some popcorn and I'll be back in a few." I'm grateful that Austin wants to do something else besides dwell in our pasts.
I walk over to the pantry and find the popcorn while he heads to the bedroom and takes a call. Once the popcorn is popping, I head to the living room and look for a movie. Well I'll be damned. He has quite a collection of chick flicks in here and Say Anything is one of them.I giggle a little at the rest of the collection as I see Sixteen Candles, Some Kind of Wonderful and Dirty Dancing. Now I'm almost hoping he has a woman.
"Know what you're over there laughing at, and they're my mom's movies, not mine. She makes Shane, Max and I have movie nights with her, and unfortunately that consists of those movies. I have the closest house, so it only makes since she keeps them here."
Can this man get any cuter? What the hell kind of guy has movie nights with their mom and watches chick flicks. A little flutter sparks in my chest but I ignore it for now. This man is doing things to me.
I nod my head at him and walk over to the DVD player. When Say Anything begins to play Austin rolls his eyes, but sits on the sofa. I get ready to sit on the other couch when he drags me over to him, and sits me practically on top of his lap, he grabs a blanket and lays it on top of us. Once we are snuggling under the blankets, I turn to the television and watch my all-time favorite movie trying desperately not to say the entire movie out loud. Yes, I'm one of those movie watchers.
We are in the middle of one of my favorite scenes, when I feel Austin lie back. I pull my gaze from the screen to this sexy man on my left and lay on top of him, and face the screen again. I have never been so brazen before with any man, but Austin brings it out of me.
"You know, not every girl can make me watch a damn chick flick. You must be something special." He whispers under me.
"Am I Austin? Something special? What am I to you anyways?" I ask facing him once again. I know we talked earlier about how we feel about each other, but I didn't know if that meant he wanted to be exclusive or not. I have no idea what I am to the man.
"I don't know babe. I've never had an old lady before, but I can't see myself letting you go even when this is all said and done. I like you, I want to see where this goes. I want you to be mine Candice." He says blowing me away.
I lean into him and kiss his delicious lips. God, he taste good. The kiss gets a little carried away and we nearly fumble to the ground.
"Let's take this to the bedroom babe." He says in a whisper.
Austin stands up and offers his hand to me. Once I'm up he bends down and picks me up, carrying me bridal style to his bedroom. I'm laughing so hard I don't even realize he has me on my back on the bed until he is hovering over me. Austin makes quick work of my shirt and pants. I start yanking on his shirt to pull it off until he stands on his knees and does that hot guy shirt off from behind move. When he accomplishes his mission, he stares at my matching bra and panty set. I have a bit of an obsession with Victoria's Secret and for my birthday Lyla gave me a gift card. Right now I'm wearing a black set and I can tell by Austin's gaze that it is much appreciated.
Austin bends back down to kiss my lips and leaves me breathless once more. He reaches from behind me to unclasp my bra and slowly lowers my panties. I've never been shy about my body but there is something about Austin Stone's gaze that has me a little self-conscious. I try and cover myself from his wondering eyes, but his hands reach out and stop me.
"You're fucking beautiful babe. You take the cake. Don't doubt for one second that you're not who I want right now. You're fucking everything Candice." God, how does this man know how to read me so well?
I reach for his jeans and find the button and zipper. After some unclasping, lowering, and more kissing we are both ready. He starts guiding himself in, but I stop him right before he gets too far.
"W-wait. Condom." Great, I'm back to not being able to make a coherent sentence again.
"Fuck. Sorry babe, got carried away." He shouts, then reaches for one in his bedroom nightstand.
Once he places it on himself, he comes back over to me. Holy balls this man is huge. A weight of nerves hit me fast when I see the girth. This man is going to kill me. He gets on the bed again and gets in between my legs. He must sense my fear because he pulls my gaze from his crotch with his fingers, and brings it back to meet his.
"We'll go slow babe." He says giving me that damn smirk I have grown to love.
He places it back at my entrance, and I take a deep breath. Slowly Austin pushes inside, and my heart feels like it is going to ignite. He allows my body a few moments to adjust to his size and then slowly, he starts to rock. I can hear his small curses and can tell he is holding back. I am much more comfortable now that he is moving, and I don't want him to not be himself in bed with me, so I reach up, clasp my hands behind his neck and bring his mouth down to mine.
Austin starts moving a little faster and with each thrust, I can tell he is losing the battle of holding back. I decide to make one last ditch effort for him to be himself with me, so I whisper something in his ear.
"I'm so fucking wet for you Austin Stone."
"Fuck, babe." He says with a raspy voice.
That's all it takes. Austin is no longer holding back as he start to pound into me. I have never felt such raw, exhilarating passion as I do right now. I was with men who weren't very comfortable with how free I was with sex so it's enjoyable to be with someone that not only accepts it, but relishes in it. I feel myself holding onto the impending rush of my climax and it isn't until Austin moves his mouth over my breasts do I find my release. Seconds later Austin joins me.
He lays down next to me and together we try to settle our breathing. I look over to him with a giant smile on my face and he does the same. That was by far the best I have ever had, and I quickly wonder if Austin has had better. It's been a while for me, but I don't want to show him my insecurities.
"Damn babe, thought I fucked all that second guessing out of you." Austin says from beside me.
I giggle at his vulgar tongue then lean in to kiss him. We sit in bed for a couple more hours just talking until I start to feel my eyes slowly closing. He lays my head down on his chest where I hear his heart beating steadily and fall asleep. Right before I doze off I hear him say something that allows me to rest peacefully.
"I'm going to protect you from him babe. I promise."
He has no idea how much those words truly mean to me.