Mabel Shot Part 4

"“But in the end, you do exactly what he wants because you like to please him. You've never really said no in a way that would throw him off course, leaving him like a boy in front of you,” she says, laughing, and lowers her hands. “Doing what he tells you gives you pleasure. That's the true pleasure of a submissive, serving her master, and we both know that’s true; just look at the way he stands guard, like a hunting dog, when he’s near you, protecting his favorite toy.
“Christ, I really do that...” I tilt my head back on the couch, just like Sieta, and get lost staring at the ceiling. “I've never really said no to him.”
I like doing what he commands; I like it even more when his brown eyes shine sexily, becoming dominant. Even when I refuse to do something, deep down I know I'm just saying no to provoke him, to be punished in some way that I know will end with him getting what he wants and me completely exhausted, my body limp from the many orgasms Mr. Gregovivk gives me.
“I thought I was doing it just for the game, but it's not,” I murmur, thoughtful, becoming more aware of how I've allowed him to control everything so easily. “I really can’t say no to Mr. Czar.”
“The game is just to bring out your demons, the most overwhelming and darkest desires that are embedded deep within you.” She takes a deep breath as we both stare at the ceiling of the living room. “Obeying what he commands is what really gives you pleasure.”
“God, this is so crazy!” I say softly, tapping my feet on the floor.
“No, this is Sodom, Mabel.” Sieta turns her face on the couch and gives my fingers a light tap on my thigh. “It's your turn to tell me how you’re doing.”
“No, but you still told me how Czar reacted when he found out you were playing Sodom with that man.” I tilt my face toward the couch and look at her. “And besides, what did Santana do? Did he accept the breakup...?”
“No dominant takes a breakup well. But he had to accept it, even though he still torments me whenever we meet. He’s afraid of Greg.” She laughs and shakes her head before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, turning her head back to the front.
“And Czar, how did he react?”
“He wasn't too happy when he found out.” She bursts into laughter. “In fact, he was furious, especially since it was with Santana that I was initiated. Greg punched Santana in the face and scolded me. Since he couldn't disconnect me anymore, he made me his right hand in Sodom in Moscow, like a big protective teddy bear.”
“Has he always been protective?” I smile, thinking about how happy Sieta was to have someone like Czar by her side.
She has no idea how blessed she was to have a family, even if it isn’t perfect, as she said. But she still had a father and a mother who loved her, cousins, and uncles. No matter how much she suffered when the reality of her father's addiction was discovered, Sieta didn’t truly suffer, not like me, Macro, and the other kids who were rejected by their own parents from a young age, left in the orphanage, depending on someone’s charity to want to adopt us.
“Greg was playful when he was younger; he laughed a lot, always getting into trouble,” she sighs softly, shaking her head. “But then he changed, became quiet, not sociable at all. He abandoned the smiling and playful traits he inherited from Aunt Melissa and became more like Uncle Huslan.”
“What changed, Sieta?” I ask, turning my face to look at her.
I try to understand what could have happened to that lively, animated young man who vanished, the one Sieta describes, leaving only this taciturn man who always hides his emotions behind his brown eyes.
“Greg became more controlling, strict, systematic with everything and everyone around him; this way he can protect and care for the things and people close to him. Doing this makes him calmer,” she sighs, telling me more about Mr. Czar. “His mind doesn’t shut off; he needs to feel in control so he knows everything is okay, that no one will get hurt.”
“Did he suffer from his mother's death? Was that what made him change?”
Sieta tilts her face toward me and looks at me thoughtfully, biting the corner of her mouth.
“It was what caused her death that made Greg change, Mabel. Aunt Melissa died because of a...” She stops at the sound of her phone ringing. She sits up and takes it out of her pants pocket, answering it. “Hello! Now?”
She gets up and walks out of the room, putting her other hand in her pants pocket. I stand up and grab the cups and the bowl from the coffee table, walking to the kitchen. I think about the death of Mr. Gregovivk's mother as I clean the cups and the bowl, placing them in the drying rack after washing. I dry my hands and turn off the faucet, taking my phone out of my pocket when it vibrates.
I let out a slow breath and look at the message from my cell provider, feeling frustrated that it’s not from Macro. I unlock the phone and open the messaging app, seeing that once again I’ve been ignored. In the last few weeks, I’ve sent him countless messages, and he hasn’t responded to any. I’ve called him God knows how many times, but he doesn’t answer. At the end of last week, I went to his apartment, and it was locked. At the university, when I looked for him, they informed me that Macro had taken some days off because an aunt of his was sick and he needed to travel to take care of her. I knew that was a lie; Macro doesn’t communicate with his aunts; he hates them. It was his aunts who threw him into the orphanage. If he ever met them again, it would only be to see their funerals in person.
“Where are you, Little Boots? I’m worried about you.”
I type another message, hoping he’ll respond to one of them. I know I shouldn’t worry so much because I’m pretty sure I know who Macro is with. But still, I can’t help but be concerned about Macro.
“Please respond, do anything. Call, send a message, a smoke signal or Morse code, even use a pigeon or a damn owl to communicate, send me a note, but just tell me you’re okay, Macro.”
I turn off the phone and put it back in my pocket, taking a deep breath and rubbing my temples. I had thought about asking Mr. Gregovivk for help regarding who this man is that Macro is with, if he could find out if they were okay. But I knew that if I did that, I’d be breaking Macro’s trust when he confided in me about his situation with this man. Macro had disappeared before; maybe they are just taking a break from everything to be together. I’ll wait until next week; if Macro doesn’t show up, I’ll have to talk to Mr. Gregovivk to help me find my friend.
“Unfortunately, I have to go; I’ll have to wait to know how your thing is going!” I lift my eyes to Sieta and see her entering the kitchen, putting her phone in her back pocket. “I need to take care of some matters that came up.”
“Seriously?” I say, upset to learn that she’s already leaving. I had grown very fond of Sieta. “Aw, that’s a shame; I was really enjoying our girls' night!”
“Don’t worry, we can go out tomorrow night; there’s a new club that just opened that I’m dying to check out.”