Chapter 50:

ELLIE

I had barely processed what he had just said when he continued.

“I still wonder how I could have been so blind. All the time I invested in that relationship was wasted.” His tone was almost melancholic, but there was also anger underlying it.

I turned and sat down; his back was resting against the headboard while he stared into the darkness of a corner. “But on the other hand, it could have been much worse if I hadn’t discovered it in time. I could be married to a woman who didn’t care about me at all.”

I didn’t know what to say. I tried to process everything his confession made me feel and what it represented. It felt so intimate. Besides being surprised, I also felt sadness and compassion for his personal tragedy.

“I’m sorry,” I managed to say.

Although I had never been betrayed in that way, I could understand him. I had lived through my own tragedy, which in a way also made me feel betrayed. I knew how devastating it could be.

“You’re right. I have no right to stop you from seeing whoever you want,” he said before getting up and heading toward the single bed a few meters away.

“Ethan?”

“Good night, Ellie.” He lay down on his back, facing away from me.

Damn. He couldn’t say something like that and just go to sleep, leaving my mind confused and full of questions. I got up and went to his bed, climbing on top of it. Turning his body, I straddled him.

“You can’t say something like that and just turn your back on me and go to sleep,” I said, poking his chest with my finger.

“Ellie...” He shook his head.

“No. Is that why you act like a bastard? Do you think all women are like her?” He sighed.

“It was you who decided I’m a bastard, so why shouldn’t I be one with you?”

“That’s ridiculous! Are you blaming me for being an asshole?”

“Okay, let’s see... bastard, asshole, arrogant, pretentious, what else? We know I’m not right for you, so forget this conversation.”

“Coward. Add that to the list. You’re a coward for treating all women like disposable toys just because one of them betrayed you. Unfortunately for you, not all of us are dishonest and lacking character.”

“Sure, let me guess. Are you going to tell me that you’re different? That you’re the woman who’s going to change my life and make me a better man?” His words were laced with sarcasm.

Was he mocking me? I wanted to slap him, but I held back. I hated the way his words affected me.

“Go to hell!” I snarled, getting off him, trembling with anger.

I grabbed a sheet from my bed before leaving the room, feeling my blood boil with rage.

How could his words hurt me so much? He meant nothing to me. I hated myself for wanting to cry. I refused to let any tears fall. I wouldn’t be weak and cry over a guy who meant nothing to me.

After going downstairs, I settled on one of the sofas. Did he think I wanted to be his girlfriend? That I wanted to convince him to have a relationship with me? How could he say those words when I had never asked him for anything like that? The idea hadn’t even crossed my mind.

It didn’t matter; I would never let him belittle me again. He was truly a coward, using sex to shield himself from any feelings. He was probably not the only man who did that.



***


ETHAN

When I thought my biggest problem would be dealing with her pity, she surprised me once again by throwing the truth in my face. Half-truth, actually. I didn’t use women and discard them; I was always honest about my intentions and never gave any of them false hope.

It was their choice to get involved with me or not. The truth was that I really avoided crossing any boundaries beyond casual sex. And so far, I have been doing well. I didn’t want and didn’t need to have feelings for someone; that had ruined me once before. I was going to make sure that was the last time.

Another fact was that I had just been a complete asshole to her, and I wasn’t going to be able to sleep with that tormenting me. She didn’t deserve my contemptuous words just for throwing a half-truth in my face.

I got up, determined to try to fix my mess. It wouldn’t be easy, given the hatred I saw in her eyes and the way she stormed out.

I went downstairs and found her lying on one of the leather sofas in the living room. She turned her face toward me, probably hearing the sound of my footsteps, then turned back toward the sofa’s back when she saw me.

Great, she was willing to ignore me. At least that was better than wanting to kill me. Of course, she might want both.

I walked over and sat on the sofa opposite hers. Leaning forward, I rested my elbows on my knees, sighing deeply as I searched for the right words.

“I’m sorry... You didn’t deserve to hear that shit,” I said softly, afraid of waking our friends.

She continued to ignore me, not moving a muscle.

“Ellie…”

“Go away,” she murmured through clenched teeth.

“What do you want me to do? I’m sorry, I know I was a jerk to you.”

“I want you to go back to the damn room.”

“Not until you say it’s okay.”

Sitting up, she had a look of irritation on her face.

“Do you think that apologizing every time you act like an asshole will fix things? You’re right, I didn’t deserve to hear that shit. I never asked you for anything and don’t expect anything from you, so forget anything that happened between us. Now, are you going to go back to the damn room, or should I?”

“Please, don’t make this harder.”

“Good night,” she said through gritted teeth, getting up.

But she only took one step before I stood up, reached her, and pulled her into my arms.

“Don’t make things difficult,” I whispered as she tried to wriggle free from my arms around her waist.

She looked sexier when she was angry, and it stirred something wild inside me.

“Let me go,” she growled, her gray-blue eyes blazing with anger.

“I want to keep apologizing now.”

“You’d better let me go, or I’m about to end your chances of being a father someday,” she said, making me smile, while at the same time feeling my cock get harder.

I turned her body, pressing her back against my chest to prevent her from hitting my balls.

“You need to relax, Miss Brown,” I whispered in her ear.

Her scent was so feminine and pleasant.

“If you don’t let me go, I’ll scream.”

Although she was resisting, I couldn’t help but notice how her breathing was becoming heavier.

“Great, then all our friends will know. But you don’t want that, do you? I have a better idea.”

“Let me go, you idiot.”

“While I appreciate your resistance, I won’t hesitate to tie you up if you keep this up.”

“You really are a pervert.”

“Do you like the idea of being tied up? Your nipples seem to like the idea quite a bit.” I said, brushing my nose against her neck, staring at how her nipples were hard against the fabric of her nightgown.

Her body relaxed a little in my arms.

“I hate you,” she sighed, letting her shoulders drop. “Okay. Let’s go upstairs. But that doesn’t mean everything is okay.”

“No, we’re not going upstairs. You’re going to bend over the sofa and lift that incredible ass for me.”

“What?” she asked, turning and tilting her face to look at me.

“You heard me.”

“Are you out of your mind?” Her eyebrows knitted together.

“Just making things more fun.”

“This isn’t fun; it’s irresponsible.”

“Obey.”

“Not a chance we’re doing that down here.”

“Yes, we are.” I took a few steps closer to the arm of the sofa, forcing her to do the same. “Bend over.”