Ana Oliveira Part 2

Damn it! I lost control when I drank and used antidepressants... Was I so out of it that he would humiliate me like that? It couldn't be!
He had so much anger, hated me, but could he have changed enough to override all principles and violate me like that? To take advantage of me?
No!
He had taken care of me many times and never did anything, and we were a couple. Josiah was messing with my head, with my fear.
Angrily, I grabbed a toothbrush that was in a cup by the dark sink, squeezed some toothpaste on it, and brushed my teeth. He always hated it when I used his toothbrush. Once I finished, I stared at the object in my hands. I considered scrubbing it in the toilet, but he was still my daughter's father... I didn’t want him to get sick from bacteria.
When I left the bathroom, Josiah was facing me, still wrapped in the towel, sitting on the kitchen counter.
“I want to talk about Little One!” he said seriously, with a dark cloud on his face. “It’s about time you understand that I’m her father.”
I froze, feeling dizzy, and leaned against the wall to keep from falling. Why was he speaking about this so openly? With such confidence? I tried not to show my surprise, but it was impossible. My eyes burned, but I held back the tears and composed myself.
“You’re not her father!” I lied, my voice choked with tears, staring him in the eyes.
“Cut that crap!” he yelled, losing patience, advancing toward me and frightening me as he gripped my face. There was so much rage in Josiah’s expression. “You know Júlia is my daughter; everyone in this damn building knows! And there’s only one reason I haven’t demanded my paternal rights in court...”
“And what’s that?” I whispered, holding his hateful gaze.
“You only have our daughter,” he murmured, softening his face into a pitying expression. That made me angry, wanting to say a thousand things. That look of pity was killing me, reminding me of how small and abandoned I was, and I didn’t like seeing myself like that. “And that’s the only reason I accepted your little act.”
“Liar!” I shouted, hitting his chest. “You never went to court because you’re afraid of everything I would say if I were there. Your only truth is that I only have her, only have our daughter. And if one day I don’t have her, nothing will hold me back, and I will speak out.”
“Yeah, you fucking bitch...” he swore, making me cry with rage, unable to free myself from his hands, which were gripping my face and pinning me against the wall. “So, you want to test me? I have nothing to hide, nothing... But if you want to keep putting our daughter in a war that’s only ours, expect consequences.”
I didn’t accept it when he let me go and moved forward, pressing my body towards him, enraged.
“I don’t want you around her!” I warned. “Josiah, you left me when I needed you the most. You hurt me on the worst day of our lives and blamed me for something I didn’t do.”
“Didn’t do?” he yelled, grabbing me by the neck so quickly I barely felt it. Josiah threw me down onto the huge kitchen counter, suffocating me with his big body and furious expression. “You did! You know you did.”
Memories flooded back. He didn’t understand, would never understand what I was feeling, overwhelmed with grief and abandonment triggers whispering in my head. Josiah would never understand...
“I’m tired of fighting!” I whispered, crying. “Let me go!”
“Always with the drama...” he murmured, bitterly, seeming disgusted. “If you don’t want to fight, at least have the decency to understand that your daughter needs her father and...”
Suddenly, Josiah fell silent, staring at my chest rising and falling desperately. It was hard to breathe with the tight grip around my neck, leaving marks. The anger was still there, behind those eyes, but there was something else, filled with a strange need.
“You’re soaking your shirt just to provoke me, aren’t you?” he asked, leaning in to look at my face.
I tried to lift my face to see what he was talking about, then he slightly loosened his grip on my neck, and I noticed that my breasts were leaking.

“Stop being an idiot, Josiah!” I grunted. “I haven’t breastfed this whole time, my breasts are leaking milk.”
He didn’t let me speak, looking so wild and consumed by desire as he tore my shirt in half, leaving me completely naked before his massive body. I could have told him to back off, but I was so sad, so angry, that all I wanted was something to take me out of that damn pain, those memories tearing me apart, making me feel guilty for all the chaos, for all the hatred he was showing toward me.
My body was covered in goosebumps as Josiah’s hot, mentholated breath hovered over my face. I stared up close at his tattoos, war tanks, flowers, skulls, tribal designs from his wrist to his neck... There were so many that I could barely take them all in. But my heart warmed at the sight of a tiny footprint tattooed on his right chest with a date below it, Júlia’s birth date. I felt a small trail of tears sliding down my face, and a cruel doubt questioned my decisions. There was love in that tattoo, so much feeling in that display, in that drawing...
Josiah fixed his gaze on mine, turning my face to look at him. He gently wiped my tears with his large fingers, a stark contrast to the ogre who had just stripped me violently. He cupped my jaw with one hand and trailed the other down my neck. I tried to lift my hands to touch his beautiful hair... But he gripped my wrists brutally and pinned them to my sides, breathing deeply like a predator.
“No touching!” he growled, bringing his face close to mine.
My body felt like it was thrown onto hot coals as Josiah lowered his face to my body, breathing over my neck, and dragging his soft tongue along the left side of my jaw. He leaned over me, making grunts as he spread my legs and lowered his face, licking my neck and sliding down. Frantic, I crossed my legs, overwhelmed with desire as my sex pulsed.
“Don’t close up!” he scolded, his breath hot on my chest, roughly prying my legs open, then hitting the back of his hand against my vagina, drawing a gasp of pain from me.
“Josiah...” I murmured.
Ignoring my moan, he continued licking my body until his lips landed on my left breast, inhaling my scent and gasping with desire, driving me wild with that minimal hint of contact. I shivered all over, feeling immersed in that perfume he never changed. I longed to bury my hands in his hair and guide that mouth to where I wanted it, between my legs. But Josiah had other plans, wrapping his teeth around one of my nipples and giving it a slight bite. I arched my body, going crazy, filled with a long-held desire.