Ana Oliveira Part 5
His tone was one of pleading, his face before mine showing such profound suffering that my heart felt crushed. Damn it!
"Do you think you can abandon this hatred and give me the other feelings? That you can reciprocate just the love I have for you?" I asked, gazing deeply into his eyes. He remained silent, pressing his lips together as he sobbed. I could see through his green eyes... I saw in his soul that the answer was only one: no. I swallowed hard, forcefully pushing his arms away from me.
"Then you can pick up your daughter from daycare on Thursdays and leave her with Marta on Friday nights. You can do this every week. Now she’s accepting the bottle better, just say that Masha doesn’t breastfeed... You’ll also be able to have her on alternate weekends, but always picking her up and dropping her off at your mother’s. I don’t want to see you there, I don’t want contact."
"Where are you planning to go now?" he asked, swallowing hard as he wiped his face with his hands. He was running his hands through his hair frantically, occasionally glancing at me as if begging for something while waiting for my response.
"I’m going to your mother’s place until I sell the house and buy an apartment."
"Okay! I’m more at ease knowing you won’t be alone..."
"Take care!" I said, trying to pass by him, but in vain. Josiah blocked me with his shoulder, turning his face away and staring at me.
"Please stop this! I don’t want a relationship like this... I know we’re not a couple, but the way we’re being together is giving me hopes you won’t be able to fulfill."
"I want you here, Docinho. I love you!"
"I know you love me... But there are other things too. And those other things, I don’t want," I explained, turning my face towards him. My bitten shoulder pressed against his chest. "I’m still your Ana... You just need to call me, and now you know that if you do, I’ll come back... But I’ll only understand that you called me when you’re ready to give yourself completely... Without those toxic traits that destroy us. I’ll wait for you for three months. If you don’t reach out in that time, I’ll understand that I can move on with my life."
I didn’t wait for him to say anything. Ignoring the way he cried, howled with rage, sadness, and frustration, I grabbed Julia’s backpack and quickly threw it over my shoulder, then picked her up from the bed, while the child grumbled without waking.
"Ana..."
I let him call my name, but was relentless as I walked away without looking back.
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