Chapters of his life

"Don't look at me like that, Cassandra trinity, just a bit and I will stop, Promise," started
I heard him saying and fix his gaze on me. I know that he would never stop drinking even though it may harm his health, I've always seen him huh that shit.
"Promises equal zero, I told you as you told me unpunctual, we have no medicine in here, and there's no way to get out aside riding your chopper, but I didn't know how to. So you will die if ever its attacks on you."
I said and flashed a stormy figure in my face while staring at him.
The night is beautiful, especially the moon that reflects on the waves of a pounding sea. It's clear blue and I wonder if it is a popular tourist destination before because of its own unique and beautiful place.
Although it is beautiful, I'm still afraid of approaching the water, I don't know why but aside from the idea that I may get drowned if I slipped, I don't know how to swim, and that shit creature on the under of that sparkling water. Yes, I'm scared, I'm scared of mermaids and their husbands. Even though it is just part of the creative minds of people, I still don't want to try.
What if it is true? Then I will die, easily.
I heard the sound of his throat while gulping the beer, it's annoying, this crackhead really getting into my nerves.
I don't know how to get him out of his habit of drinking always and...I just don't know why I can't even get mad at him. Maybe we're not friends and not family so that I have no reason to be mad at all times.
"Maki, that's kinda annoying," I uttered and he nodded but he didn't look.
I watch his eyes as they glimpse because of the moon's brightest light gets into his gazes. I already convinced myself that he's handsome, no lies, he's looking like an angel in disguise.
Silence remains in while between between us, only the waves, wind, and some tweeting of the night birds can hear in the surrounding that surrounds us.
If it lasts, I'm sure, I will be bored. I thought this was exciting but it feels like an emptiness in me.
I'm always like this, every night, every fucking night since problems love me at all times, day or night, a special day or just an ordinary.
I wonder if Sana is in good condition if mama is smiling now or happy, And if...If...Renz is thinking about me. Mesmerizing the beauty of the full moon and thinking about our past or not?
Fire is really beautiful and fantastic, incomparable and deep to think. How was the fire formed and how it still keeps alive even the wind is trying them to knock it out.
The food is delicious, beef's meat is really good at all dishes, but I'm not good at cooking.
Did I see him, still watching the moon? Or staring again in the nothingness of the sea.
He seems so problematic on the way he holds the bottle of the beer and bit his lower lips, not blinking his eyes.
I wonder what he thinks or what is all about and why.
"Do you have a problem?"
Unknowingly I spoke. I widened my eyes and tried to simply look away.
What the hell that my mind connects to my mouth and then they are both confused so that my mouth speaks? Oh God, I'm ashamed.
I'm ashamed but I am waiting for his response. I just want to know what he thinks and what he feels right now, aside from it, I want to break the silence and boredom in between of us.
I noticed that he didn't eat and just drink. I kinda feel sorry for him. I think he's thinking of something important.
A few seconds passed but It seems like I'm waiting for nothing to come and to winds to speak for me... He remains in silence and I have no words to speak to him.
I watched him as he moves his hands upper holding the bottle and gently putting it on his mouth, drinking all rest of the beer from that bottle, his throat that gulps all of it, and his little tongue to lick his lower lips.
Here we are again. Seducing me. Yeah, it seduces me. I'm just going to be true to myself.
"I have many," he uttered and I raised my brow,
Yeah, I already knew it. Man, quiet doesn't always mean yes, it sometimes means many things, words, thought, feelings, and emotions that we never talk about to other people. And just keep it on yourself, devouring it all. Problems, and unsaid reflections.
"Yeah, I...I understand," I said and gently looked down.
I don't imagine that even men can be like women, secretive.
I didn't say anything and just let things to go. Let the winds approach us and then leave, let the night birds to tweet until it becomes tired, and let the moon shine above us. Above the world.
I just think of something strange...
Yeah, very something strange.
How was the feeling of being treated like a moon?
To love like a moon?
And to be loved like a moon?
Also...to adore like Luna, surrounded by billions of stellar and sometimes kiss by the clouds and leave when the day comes,
Moon,
For me, it symbolizes hope
The way it shines even she's surrounded by the darkness,
And for me, it seems like it really smiles at me whenever I feel like I am lost again.
And there's a person who always adores you even you are far.
Waited for your come back
And still loves you even you're not always whole.
How to be you? Luna.
"I just keep on silent because I'm thinking an important, it's not about you, and I'm not mad."
.he uttered and I look at him.
"No, I'm not thinking that way, I just feel like you have something in your head that makes you feel bothered," I started trying to read his gestures.
It node and drink again from another one bottle.
"You...you know what? It feels so boring, we both don't speak and just stare at the sea,"
I said and he drink.
He sighed and wiped his wet lips.
"I'm sorry if you got disappointed and It didn't meet your expectation to happen."
"No, it's not, I'm not disappointed, it's just boring a bit but, I realize that it calms me and makes my veins and brains to relax..."
I said trying to vanish the idea on his mind.
I do really get disappointed a bit but that doesn't matter now to me.
I respect him if he doesn't want to open it up to me.
"I'm sorry for the boredom, I'm just out of words tonight,"
He stated and drink. Did he say sorry for about two times? That is so unbelievable. Just kidding,
"What is on your mind that keeps your words vanished suddenly and you're jumbled your mind?"
I asked but he didn't reply. He's not comfortable, I know.
"Hmm, nothing, it's not important for you," he answered after a billion years of waiting
I sighed and smiled firmly.
"But it seems like it is very important for you that you could give your time thinking of it, Maki, what's the purpose of me here? Care to share?"
I asked and this time he glances at me. Fixing his gaze and making my hands feel cold. What's wrong with your stares? It keeps me cold and I can't take my eyes off you.
You're kinda sexy with your summer look polo and the way its three buttons open revealing the...uh, I don't know what's with your necklace that it could shine furthermore your eyes.
I just noticed that you have a piercing in the upper side of your ear, and a mark on your lips. I guess because of your piercing on it too. I remember you wearing around silver look like a thin ring on your lips that makes you cooler than cool, And that's because of that I always lay my eyes on your red fluffy lips.
"I...I just lost something irreplaceable, and very important to my life,"
He stated and keep on looking at me. I don't know what to say or what to do, I just fixed my eyes on him.
Hey, Cassandra wake up! Hey!
"I-Irreplaceable? Uh...Uhm, I...Uhm Who is that? Or... What is that?"
I gripped on the other end of a carpet as I tried not to be mistaken and to break my voice but I was just in trouble, I feel ashamed!
"Who is her? Someone else that is very significant,"
he said and look again at the yellowish full moon above.
Is she...her girlfriend? Is he talking
About his past lover? Love life or past relationship....?
"Who's that girl? And why did she breaks your heart?" I asked and felt sorry.
It pins his lips and sighed. He's looking damn frustrated and lowkey mad.
He stares at Luna. (Latin name for moon) and I stare at it the way he used to.
I wonder who was the last girl he stared the way he stares at the moon,
And who was a great person that he decided to gave his heart,
"She is kinda different and taught me so many things in life, a good one with a bad idea of leaving me,"
He started to be open.
Leave? So that you experienced also my past? Wow? What a coincidence?
"Us..." He added.
I am using a fork in a soup here, what us? Us? Me and him?
I guess I'm the one who's getting drunk by just understanding his phrases,
"She...a beautiful woman in my world, and a very loving but kinda numb,"
So what is this? A compliment and then sudden falls on judgment?
"I'm sure she's now regretting it, Maki," I said in a lower tone just like him.
He picked up a pebble and threw it on the water, it bounced and quickly fell off under the water.
"No, she's not, I can clearly say that she is not regretting it and when she chose to do that, I know that it would make her happier than with us," he denied and drink.
He seems mad and irritated but, the word us is kinda hard to understand. Is he referring to us? We both? Here? Me and him? But I don't know who was that she in his story!
"Did she at least say sorry to you?" I asked and he shook his head.
"No need, I don't want to hear it from her, words often used to tell lies and to hurt sometimes, I knew that she is not sorry for it. It's her freedom,"
You are right Maki, words are often used to break a heart and to break you apart, the reason why I don't believe in people's promises, especially him.
"I understand,"
I uttered and look at him.
I didn't imagine that he could be sadder and look like a depressive one. Cause I always see his smirk, serious look, but not his sorrowful side.
"But At least you...oh, I think you are not okay, Just cry if you wanted to, I will never judge you by the way,"
"Why do I cry? Never," he answered.
He's a boy by all of the sudden.
Faker than girls when it comes to tears and pain.
"So to what way you wanted to bury all of your sorrow huh? In beers and alcoholic beverages? To burn your liver? I told you not to drink right?"
"It's just a beer and light drinks,"
"Maki! I said,"
"No, just let me be!"
"I guess that that's the reason why she leaves you,"
"No, she chose another family!"
I get startled, what? Family? Did he...did he talks about his...
"And We both don't know the reason behind that, we just... We just need to let her go cause that makes her happier, she said,"
Am I dreaming bad dreams? Cause Id I am, please wake me up,
Still looking at the moon he chuckles,
"She is kinda numb but...I miss her," he almost whisper. I feel broke.
"W-where is she now, Maki? Where is her house and who is she belong with?"
"In Seoul, South Korea, planning her wedding with her family,"
We both remain silent, what was going on? I feel cold and sad.
"I...I'm sorry, I...I feel sorry if she didn't say sorry to you. or if you don't want to hear it from her then I will be the one to say sorry,"
"For what? For what she commits to do? That's useless —"
"For the sorrow that The world gives to you, that makes you feel sorrowful,"
"But why?"
"Nothing, I just want to help,"