Chapter 39

Garne came back, after a while, but I didn’t want to talk anymore, and neither did he, so we sat in silence, the beeping of the heart monitor the only sound in the room.
How could I speak to him when my mind was drowning itself in grief? I wish my mother was here to guide me through what I must do next. But she isn’t, they killed her because she was soft at heart.
They killed her because she showed mercy to a family with small children, and I can’t say that I wouldn’t have done the same thing. I would have also let them go.
I could never understand why the council attack families who have done nothing wrong, all they want is to live their lives in peace, but the council wouldn’t allow it, all because of what they were.
I close my eyes, trying to settle down and maybe get some sleep, I wanted to ask about the pain relief, but Garne didn’t seem to be in the mood.
The door opens just as I am about to fall asleep, a man in a white coat with greying hair walking into the room and shutting the door behind him, his green eyes shifting between Garne and I.
“Doctor.” Garne says, sitting a little straighter.
“Garne.” Nods the stranger. “Apologies for taking so long, we had an emergency to deal with.” He turns to me, “I heard that you need some pain relief, is that correct?”
I slowly move into a seated position on the bed, and I nod, “yeah, the pain isn’t much fun.” I say.
“I can imagine.” He pulls out a syringe with a needle and fills it full of a clear liquid, handing the vile to Garne to inspect.
“Why are you giving it to him?” I ask, curious.
The doctor looks at me, frowning, “it is so your master knows what has been given to you whilst under my care.” He steps forward, tapping the needle, “The Nati can be very protective over what belongs to them, and Mihai is no different. He told me to take good care of you whilst he was away.”
Whilst he was away? Where has he gone?
I turn to look at Garne, “he’s left?”
Garne glances at the doctor, clearly uncomfortable, “He had some things to take care of, he shouldn’t be gone for more than a day.”
My heart shatters a little, he didn’t even tell me that he was leaving.
I thought we were getting closer, maybe I was wrong.
Maybe we weren’t close at all.
Fuck, I’m so stupid.
That’s what I get for putting my trust in someone, it is always me that gets hurt. Always. I should have learnt from the last time. But clearly, I haven’t.
I turn to the doctor, “can I have the pain relief please, I’d like to sleep.”
And maybe forget that Mihai has abandoned me when I need him.
The doctor glances at Garne once again, searching for permission.
I’m fucking sick of this!
“Don’t look at him.” I snap, clenching my fists. “It’s my body, and I want the medicine.”
The doctor’s eyes widen at the anger in my voice, “I meant no offence miss Williams, but I cannot give you anything without your guardians permission.”
I turn my anger to Garne, “you are classed as my guardian? Why the fuck do I need a guardian?” I lean forward, “I’m a grown woman, not a child.”
“Funny.” Garne says, his voice like ice, “because right now I can’t tell the difference, you are throwing a tantrum because Mihai left, just as a child would.”
My anger bubbles and growls until I can no longer handle it, and I was certain that if my body wasn’t hurting so much, I would have thrown myself at him, and tried to hurt him.
No one speaks to me like that, not anymore, I won’t stand for it.
“I’m sick of everyone treating me like I live in a bubble.” I say, growling a little, “I am not weak, and I am not a child.”
Garne stands, staring at me with wide eyes and taking a step away from me, “Mae, you need to calm down.” He says.
I growl again, wrapping my hands around the safety bar on the bed and using it to pull myself to my feet, the pain almost gone as anger takes over, clouding my mind.
“Do NOT tell me to calm down!” I shout, stumbling forward, “I’m so sick of being told what to do! No more!”
Garne takes another step back, blocking my view of the doctor, “Mae, listen to me, very carefully, you need to take a deep breath and calm down.”
“Why should I?!” I scream, “why should I calm down?!”
I’m tired of being calm, I’m tired of living by other peoples rules.
It is time I live by my own rules.
“Because if you don’t, you are going to kill one of us.” Garne says, holding his hands out like I’m a wild animal, “Mae, your eyes are red.”
I stop, his words sinking into my mind like a knife through butter, and I turn, staring into the mirror beside the bed.
He’s right, my eyes are a crimson red, and my skin has gone impossibly pale, I look sick, very sick.
I suddenly feel dizzy and I lean back against the bed, my eyes falling to the bar I had grabbed, my eyes widening when I realise that it has been bent out of shape.
Did I do that? But how?
I turn to Garne, my eyes wide, “what is happening to me?”
He slowly approaches me, helping me onto the bed, “I’m not sure.” He says, softly, “but maybe you should sleep for a while, it’ll help you calm down.” He turns, nodding to the doctor. “Give her the medicine.”
I glance at the doctor, my eyes still wide, and my mind unable to catch up to what is going on, and before I know it, my skin is pierced by the needle, and my eyes grow heavy.
Garne lays me on the pillow, “sleep now, I’ll find out what is going on, I promise.”
My eyes grow impossibly heavy, my body too exhausted to move, and darkness takes over my mind, plummeting me into a land of endless black.