Chapter 70

It takes a few more days, but i finally grow enough balls the leave the bedroom and venture downstairs in the middle of the day, and i am pleasantly surprised when the sun doesn’t burn me to a crips like i thought it would.
Mihai was right, i must be one of the strong ones, even if i don’t feel like it.
I stroll into the kitchen and switch on the coffee maker, waiting rather impatiently for it to make my go go juice. I need it today, especially if i am going to meet Dren when he gets back to the mansion. He's away on business until this evening.
I pour a small amount of milk into the coffee once it’s ready, and then i head outside onto the porch, sitting down in one of the chairs that overlooks the entire backyard.
I used to dream of living in a place like this when i was younger, but i never dreamt that it would happen like it has. I never dreamed I'd have to kill my brother to make it here.
But life has a very funny way of throwing things at you that you never expect, and a lot of that has happened over the past few months.
I'm grateful i met Mihai, without him i wouldn’t have survived. But i didn’t want any of this. I wanted a quiet life, alone, somewhere free from all of the drama the council brings.
But I'm starting to realise that was never meant to be, i was never meant to have the quiet life, or peace. I was born a fighter, and that is the route life has planned out for me.
I can whine and cry about it all i want, but it won’t change what has happened, and it won’t change what i must do.
I turn my head when i hear footsteps, instinctively reaching towards the knife hidden in my waistband, but i let it go, smiling from ear to ear.
“I thought you had been banished from my sight.” I ask, though i couldn’t be happier to see him.
Garne takes the seat beside mine, his eyes seeming far away, “I didn’t think I'd see you again either, but Mihai called me back, he said you needed me.”
My smile widens, so, he has finally gotten over his own jealousy. I'm glad. I didn’t think i could handle any more of the green-eyed monster.
“I’m glad you are back.” I say softly, placing my hand on his, “Mihai was right, i do need you, i need a friend.”
Garne slowly pulls away his hand, and pulls out a box, the same box Luthor gave me on the night of my birthday. “I found this whilst i was clearing away the bodies. I put the necklace inside, but it’s broken.”
My hand goes straight to my neck, i hadn’t even noticed the necklace was missing.
I take the box, putting it beside me on the floor. “I will ask Mihai if he can get it fixed.” i murmur, looking out at the trees.
Garne is silent for several minutes while i drink my coffee, just having him beside me is enough neither of us need to say anything. He was the first and only friend i have ever had.
Maybe i am afraid he’ll leave again if i say the wrong thing. Does he even know what i did?
Does he know that i killed my own brother just to survive?
Fuck. I don’t want to tell him. Family is important to him, and here i am, killing the only family i have ever known.
“Stop panicking Mae, i already know, and i know that it wasn’t your fault.” he says harshly, running a hand down his face. “Sean made his choice, and you shouldn’t suffer because of it.”
“I don’t really think it was Sean who made the choice.” I say softly, “He was always so easily manipulated by Nathanial.”
Garne shakes his head, “He would have killed you! And i guarantee he wouldn’t feel half as guilty as you do now.”
I sigh, i want to disagree with him, i want to tell him that he is wrong, and that Sean wasn’t like that. But the truth is, he’s right, he wouldn’t have felt guilty. He hates all Nati, and that extends to me also. The truth is he would have been pleased with himself. He would have made his father proud, and he would have finished me off brutally.
That's always been his signature, brutal, not fast. No mercy.
“Why don’t you go for a run?” Garne asks, “I can watch you from here to make sure you are safe.”
I smile, i haven’t done that is so long. “Sure.”
I take off my slippers and my nightgown, glad that i wore joggers and a jumper underneath.
This is going to be great, i can finally stretch my legs.
It's a cold day, but that doesn’t matter, i won’t feel the chill once my legs are moving.
I pull the knife from the waistband of my joggers and hand it to him, “Don’t lose it.” i warn him.
He smiles, “I won’t, it’s safe with me.”
I nod, but i watch as he places it onto the table, slightly nervous to leave it behind. I know that Garne won’t let anything happen to me but leaving it behind is causing me anxiety.
“Go.” he insists, giving me a slight push.
“I’m going.” I snap back, walking down the porch steps onto the grass, smiling as my bare feet sink into the mud.
I have missed this.
This is exactly what i need.