Chapter 42

I’ve always loved the thrill of a fight, but i never allowed myself to kill, not until it was either me or Amanda, and even then, i didn’t allow myself to enjoy it. But getting hunted all the time was really starting to anger me, and not just because i didn’t want it, but because I've always tried to have a life outside of violence.
But not anymore, i am starting to realise that violence follows me wherever i go, and if i have to kill to keep on breathing, that is exactly what i am going to do.
I don’t spare a single glance at green eyes as i slowly back the other one into the corner, flipping the knife in my hand to make sure i have a good grip of it.
Brown eyes rushes towards me at the last second, trying to pry the knife from my hand, and it feels as though he is trying to break every bone there at the same time. But it doesn’t work, and by the graces of whatever god is out there, i hold onto the knife, and my hand doesn’t break.
But regardless of broken bones, it still fucking hurts, and i need to make him stop, quickly, before i do have a crushed hand.
I throw the knife into my free hand and jap it deep into his side, the guy grunting in pain as he grabs my arm, twisting it backwards until i am on my knees.
“That was a mistake, you bitch.” He snarls in my face, his breath so rotten he could have eaten literal garbage and i wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference.
Just ew.
I balance myself on one knee, and i am able to see the punch before it connects with my skin, blocking it with the side of my free arm. I grunt at the pain, but instead of slowing me down, it just makes me more angry.
And the world turns red.
I can feel myself moving, and i know i am fighting, but i cannot concentrate on any of it, there is a strange smell in the air, and it smells like heaven. I want it. I need it.
Whatever it is, i have to get more of it.
Flavour sours across my tongue like a tsunami over land, and i drink the liquid greedily, the thick and sweet juice sliding down my throat, satisfying me in a way that food never has.
What is this heaven?
“Mae!” comes a voice from the hall, the sound of a struggle soon following.
So, these guys weren’t alone. Good to know.
I try to focus and see what is going on around me, but it’s so hard, and i just want to taste more of the heavenly drink, whatever it is.
It's distracting me, i can’t focus.
“Mae!” i hear again, though it sounds more desperate this time. “Mae come back to me.”
The angry that swelled inside of my chest slowly begins to simmer into annoyance as i take long breaths, licking my lips to savour the sweet flavour of the juice.
But when my eyes focus again, it is like nothing i have ever seen before.
The room is covered in blood, it was in every corner, and on every piece of furniture, including the heart monitor that drove me insane. Below me there is a mangled corpse, brown eyes staring back at me lifelessly.
I urn my head, looking around, and the doctor is now awake, trembling in the corner, his skin as white as a sheet.
The other Nati, the one with green eyes in nowhere to be seen, but i can hear his familair screaming in the coridor outside.
“Get me away from her!” he cries, “She is fucking crazy!”
Did i do this?
I couldn’t have, I'm not a Nati, I'm nothing even remotely close to these creatures.
I look down at myself, and i am covered in the same blood that coats everything else, but there is more on me, i am soaked. I nervously swipe my hand over my lips and look down at it, my hand covered in fresh blood.
I couldn’t have done this.
I turn to Mihai who is knelt beside me, whispering soft words to calm my mind, but i don’t know what to say to him, what can i say? Would he know the terror in my mind?
“Can i touch you?” he asks softly.
I nod my head, confused and numb.
The same words play over and over in my head, i couldn’t have done this. I couldn’t have done this.
Mihai pulls me onto his lap and rocks me back and forth until my eyes grow heavy, but i know that i cannot fall alseep. Not when my mind is alive with panic.
“What did i do?” i whisper, staring at the bloody pile that used to be a person.
“This isn’t your fault Mae, you didn’t know what you were.” Mihai says softly, stroking my blood-soaked hair, “None of us could have known.”
“What am i?” i ask, looking up at him with tears in my eyes.
“Mae, this might be hard to believe, but you are not human.” He says, rocking me more gently, “You are a Nati.”
The words that fall from his lips hit me in the chest so hard that i cannot breathe any longer, my heart is thundering so loud in my ears that i am death, and then, everything turns black. Darkness dragging me down.
Perhaps, the darkness has become a comfort after all.
A safe place to hide.