Chapter 19

Unedited...

Sabrina exits the taxi and stands in the cold winter air in front of her childhood home. It was a typical three-bedroom house with a basement and a decent backyard. She looked at the green shutters remembering her father changing the color from blue to green so their house would be different than the others in their neighborhood. It still didn't hit her yet that he was no longer in this world. She tried hard not to think too much about it, but she knew she would have to face it soon. For now, she needed to be as strong as possible for her mother, her sister, and herself.

She opens the door hearing talking coming from another room. She strips off her jacket and boots, then walks the living room /kitchen.

Her sister first saw her. "Sabrina!" Gracie runs and gives her a tight hug.

Gracie begins to cry immediately. Sabrina hugs her back and looks at her mother sitting at the kitchen table. She has a smile but a pain in her eyes.

Sabrina lets go of her sister and hugs her mother. "Mom..." She holds on to her for a moment.

Once they break apart from each other they each take a seat around the kitchen table.

"Where's Nathan?" Gracie asks.

Sabrina was waiting for that question. She hadn't contacted him. She made her flight arrangements and had Elroy drop her the airport.

"He's in Hong Kong. He has a really important project he's working on right now."

Gracie creases her eyebrows "I'm sorry to say this but, that is very inconsiderate of him. Your father just died he should be here for you."

"Gracie." Sabrina pleads. "That's the last thing on my mind." She reaches across the table touching her mother's hand. "Mom, how have you been holding up?"

"I'm ok baby." Mariel puts pressure on her daughter's hand. "I'm glad the two of you are here with me." She gets up. "Let me make us some hot chocolate or something." Her mother is where she learned her avoiding techniques.

"How are you?" She shifts her attention to her sister.

"I'm good." Gracie's eyes fill with moisture. "I miss him so much."

They reach for each other and enter a long hug. "I know I miss him too." She looks over to her mother who weeps over the sink.

Both sisters get up and wrap their arms around her.
Sabrina didn't cry. She wanted to be strong for them. After a while of conversation and enjoying each other's company Sabrina goes into her dad's office. The whole room smelled like oak and peppermint.

She lowers her self on his large leather reclining chair and stiffs through papers. Right away she starts to making funeral arrangements. She distracts herself with the details and blocks out the actual event.

Her phone rings suddenly.

It was Nathan. "Hello." She answers quickly.

"Sabrina."

His voice stirred emotions in her. She swallows her weakness down."Yes."

"Are you ok?" So much concern rang from his voice.

"I'm good, thank you for calling."

"Sabrina. You should have informed me the moment you knew. I'm flying out there."

No, no, no. She didn't want that. Nathan shouldn't have to come to the funeral of the man who's been blackmailing him. If she didn't lie to herself, her other reason is she didn't want to be this vulnerable around him. "No." She argues firmly.

"Sabrina, I'm coming." He wasn't asking.

"I don't need you here. There's no reason for you to come. I'll just tell everyone you are dealing with important business. It's not a big deal."

"Sabrina, it is a big deal." He speaks to her calmly.

She was the one losing it. "Nathan don't come. I don't want you here." She hits the end and puts her head down in her arms. She was frustrated with herself and her life but, she wouldn't cry.

When she picks her head back up, her eyes connect with her mother's. Mariel was standing in front of the desk holding a yellow Manila envelope.

"Here." She sits and hands it to Sabrina. "This is your dad's life insurance policy."

Sabrina takes it and reads on for a few minutes.

Her father has a policy for $250,000. The money was to pay for the funeral and the rest goes to her mother and sister.

"Have you called them?"

"No." Mariel shakes her head. "Sabrina, your dad."

"I know why he left the insurance money to you and Gracie." She cuts her mother off. "He's blackmailing Desmond Alden for half his company." She states simply. "I don't want it, mom."

Marie stayed silent.

"Nathan told me." Sabrina continues. "Why mom? Why did he do this to my life? To Nathan's life?"

Mariel shakes her head. "Many reasons, none of which I could talk him out of."

"Tell me...please...Why?"

Mariel lets out a deep breath. "Your father designed the airplane engine that built Alden enterprises. He and Desmond went to the same college. They became best friends and eventually started a company together."

"What happened?"

"Well, I started working for them. It was called B&D Enterprises at the time. Your father and Desmond showed their interest in me. I, however, was only interested in your dad. That is where the problem began. Their friendship fell apart when your father and I made our relationship public."

Mariel stands up and walks over to the window. "Soon after that Desmond took your dad to court. He wanted your father out. He said he was defaming the company name and sleeping with one of the employees."

"But it's daddy's designs."

"Your father couldn't prove that. He trusted Desmond, so they never drew up any final paperwork. All he had was his original sketch with an agreement that they had written when the company was an idea. Unfortunately, he couldn't find it when he needed it. Then when the judge heard Desmond say that he was the sole financial provider for the start of the company that was it." She turns back to Sabrina. "It's was in every newspaper. We had a hard time getting jobs after that. And your father resented the fact that he couldn't give us a better life."

Sabrina stands and moves near her mother.
"How?" She put pressure on her mother's shoulder. "How is he blackmailing them?"

"Sit Sabrina, I'll tell you." Her mother makes a hand motion for her to sit. She obeys and tries to calm herself. "You remember when we were spring cleaning three summers ago?"

She nods

"Well, your father found an old dinner jacket. In the pocket was a paper with a sketch of his engine model he was looking for a long, long time. He was in shock when he found it. He was looking for it for years. He wanted to take Desmond to court again right away. But I told him that he would be taking away from Nathan and Desmond's other children. He would hurt Desmond's family who had done nothing to us. Fortunately, he listened to me but Then, when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He hatched this plan. You see that sketch he found was the only proof he had of his partnership with Desmond. It proved that Desmond invested in his design. Please don't be mad at him, Sabrina. He was trying to secure your future. He wants his kids and grandkids to benefit from the fruits of his labor."

Sabrina felt nothing, at least she understood a little bit more of why her father made her marry the Alden heir but she didn't want wealth or power. She wanted a husband that loves her. She wanted kids and a happy marriage.

She picks up the insurance forms from the table. "Where is this paper?"

"Your father has hidden it. He said it's much safer for you if no one knows where it is."

"I'm going to call them." Sabrina holds up the form. She didn't want to talk anymore. Not about anything.

Mariel gets the drift and leaves without another word.

It's the morning of the burial. Sabrina dressed in a simple black dress that hung below her knees. She pairs it with black stockings and black heels.

The hearse arrives with the coffin first. Sabrina watched as if she was above the 6 feet hole. All of a sudden she felt like her gut was ripped out. Her father was in there.

She didn't know what she was feeling. Anxiety, panic, loss, stress, sadness all mixed up together settling in her throat.

She takes a few deep breaths and starts to make a speech. Her friends and family listened to the sweet words she spoke about her father.

While she speaks, a limo pulls up where all the cars are parked. She pays no mind to it. She talks about what a good father and husband he was. Then it was time to lower the coffin.

Her sister and mother come close to her. They put their hands around her each other.

Sabrina begins to hyperventilate. "He's gone. He's really gone. "

She holds on to mother and sister. The pain she felt was incomparable to anything she has ever felt. She can't let her self cry she needed to be strong.

Suddenly she feels a present. Someone was standing directly behind her. A large hand starts gently rubbing her back.

She doesn't turn she assumes it a family member wanting to console her. She is uncaring anyway. She forces her eyes on the coffin being lowered making herself finally face her father's death. A feeling of terror envelopes her. She starts to uncontrollably shake her head in denial of what was before her eyes.

She jerks herself out of her sister's and mother's arms. "No!" She screams while taking steps backward. She backs up into a large form who hauls her into warm inviting arms.

"It's ok sweetheart." Nathan's voice whispers in her ear as he held her close to his chest.

The sound was soothing. She felt safe like, she could let go. It's like he told her with three little words that it's ok to mourn your father. You don't have to be strong all the time. She cried into his chest. She cried violently. "He's gone. He's gone." She wept aloud.

She feels Nathan's grip tightens. He holds her head and kisses her on the forehead. He wouldn't let her go, and Sabrina didn't want him to.


After the coffin was down people started one by one to leave. Sabrina kept her eyes closed inhaling his muscular scent. It brought a moment of peace to her. She holds on the front of his coat taking his comfort.

"Sabrina, are you coming?"

Sabrina was forced to come back to reality. She opens her eyes to see Mariel and Gracie standing near them. Practically everyone had already left.

Nathan held into his waist but didn't pull her. He connects his chest with her back. "Come with me."

She looks at her mother guiltily. She needed Nathan.

"It's ok, go. We'll see you later." Gracie smiles at her sister softly.

Once they leave she blinks up at Nathan. "What are you doing here? I told you not to come."

Nathan wipes leftover tears then puts his hands on her arms rubbing up and down. "Let's go." Ignoring her question he holds her hand and leads her to his limo.

Once inside, he sits across from her. He wanted to give her space, but he could hardly bear staying away. Especially not when she was hurting so bad. He moves near her. Come here." He slips his hand around her waist and pulls her close.

He holds her jaw and turns her head. A breath escapes him. He caresses her cold cheek. He can see the pain was in her eyes.

"What are you doing here Nathan?" Sabrina's voice is low and tired.

He keeps his eyes on her and starts to check her body. He shifts her head and opens her jacket. "What are you doing?" Sabrina asks.

"I just need to know your ok."

"How is unzipping my jacket going to assure you of that?"

He doesn't respond. He puts his forehead and closes his eyes. "I've missed you." He kisses her cheek. "I can't help myself."

Sabrina felt something other than stress and sorrow. The butterflies in her stomach were back. "Nathan?" She says his name like a question.

"Yes, sweetheart." He moves his mouth inches from hers.

She couldn't remember what she was going to say. All she could think about was feeling his lips on hers.

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