Chapter 34

Unedited...



When they arrived home that night Sabrina asked Nathan for some space. She just wanted to adjust. Reluctantly he agreed, and she barely saw him since. She knew he was in the house somewhere because the one time he had to leave for an hour, he let her know that he was leaving, and made sure she had his cell number in case of an emergency.

Two days went by and she started feeling a bit lonely, and bored. She searches the house for Nathan finally coming to a halt in front of a dark wooden door. She knocks lightly.

"Come in."

He was seated at his desk with his attention on the papers lying in front of him. ”Sabrina." He glances up and is surprised. "Are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine." She watches him stick his hands in his pocket. "I'm just...I'm bored I guess.”

His eyebrows rise but before he can speak she interrupts him.

"Before the incident, what did I do all day?"


He clears his throat. "Well, ahhh."

He rubs his chin. "The animal shelter, you volunteered at an animal shelter. "But Sabrina I don't think it's a good idea for you to leave this home."


"Please, Nathan." She pleads. "I'm going crazy."


"I know sweetheart, ” He could dissolve every time his name came out of his mouth… but it's not safe. You know someone is trying to kill you, and it's not a risk I'm willing to take."



She was definitely not used to endearments... She was beginning to see why she was married to him. He was sweet and so patient. Still, it shocked her that she was married to Nathan Alden. He wasn't the way she judged him to be at all. Anytime his gaze landed on her it was always so soft.

She curls hair behind her ear. “Can't you send me with a bodyguard?"


He didn't trust anyone but himself to look after her. He had two bodyguards watching her when she was hurt, to begin with. "No." He declares firmly.


Seeing and hearing a bit of harshness in his voice she was silent for a second taking it in when suddenly he let out a long breath. "I'm sorry love. I just can't."


"I understand." She turns, about to leave,


"Sabrina." He almost whispered.


"Yes." She turns back. He was growing on her, the way he looked at her, the way he spoke to her, she felt loved. He must love her. The way he cares for her and worries about her. She wanted badly to remember what they shared together.


"Is there anything I can do for you?" His voice and eyes were so genuine.


"Can you take me out? I don't know the area, and I would like to."


He didn’t blink when he swallowed. He just wanted her safe and content. "Sure...."


Two hours and a lot of sightseeing later they decide to stop at a restaurant called Emilio's. "It's my favourite," Nathan admits while getting out of the truck and opening the door for her.


"Have I come here before?" She asks.


He didn't want to lie to her. "I've been meaning to bring you." He opens the restaurant doors.

A tingle runs up and down her spine when his hand cups her lower back ushering her in.


They received a booth right away, although there was a wait. A waitress comes near and places two menus down. Nathan orders a bottle of wine and scans the menu.


Sabrina became distracted by something shining in the candlelight. It was Nathan's wedding ban. She looked at his large hands, working hands. Hard and firm. She could see veins in them. In a way, it was very appealing to her. She suddenly wondered what it would feel like to have his hands all over her body. An unfamiliar feeling of need strikes her. She wanted to be with her husband.

She looks down at her own fingers at her wedding band and diamond ring.


"Something wrong?" He brings her thoughts back to their table.


"No." She lied. Something was wrong. She wanted her husband. Her mind wanted to know what her body knew, what her body was craving.


After a few minutes, the waitress comes back, and they order. He gets the steak and she gets the fish. They eat quietly at first, like an awkward first date.


"Do you like it?" He breaks the silence.


"Hmm-mm... I do it's really good." She swallows and continues on. "Can I ask you something?"


"Of course."


"Who tried to kill me and why?" It's a question she’s been both wanting and dreading to ask.


He fills his mouth, chews, swallows, and runs his strong hands through his hair. "I don't know yet, but believe me, sweetheart, I will find out."


He calls her sweetheart almost through her off-topic.


Chewing her food she began to mull over the things her mother said to her, "he loves you, and you love him." Her body definitely recognized him. Maybe she should just try to live life, and the first step would be to try and find her way back to Nathan.


"Nathan I was thinking." She bites her bottom lip. "I think maybe." She looks everywhere but at him. "I've had enough space now."


He freezes. Finally, she wanted him, and she wanted to give their marriage a try. He wanted so badly for her to invite him in but, a huge problem lay behind him. Truly they were soon to be divorced. If he let his weakness for her control him, it would be like he was taking advantage of her memory loss. If she happens to remember everything she will never speak to him again, he would never get a second chance with her.

Why couldn't he have met Sabrina in different circumstances? He didn't think she would want to work on their marriage. Especially not so soon.


"Okay." He nods


"Can I ask you another question?" She questions.

He nods for her to go on.


"I remember reading about you, and the different women you had on your arm." She takes a sip of her glass of wine. " I guess what I'm trying to say is, what changed? Are you satisfied being with one woman?"


"What changed is you. I want you and only you." He loosens his tie getting a little uncomfortable. "And I'm very satisfied."



A blush crept up her cheeks. "Were there any other women you were serious with?" She just had to know more about him and if he really was committed to her. If he did love her.


"No." He states simply. "Only you."


"Why?" She presses on.


"You are not another woman, you're different and special. It's just you Sabrina. The way you are, who you are." He wasn't used to talking about his feelings, but it was something she probably needed to know. " I want no one else."


Butterfly's floated around her stomach. His gaze, and the way he spoke, every word told to her, she knew, and could see in his eyes was sincere.


"Do you like animals?" She changes the subject before she turns blood red.


"Kinda." He puts his fork on his plate.


"What's your favourite colour?" She lightens the mode with a bright smile.


"I don't think I have one."


"Really?" She was in shock.


He nods. "What's yours?"


"Shouldn't you know?" She says accusingly.


"I want to see if it changed over time." He answers back smoothly.

"Purple. Has it changed?"

He shakes his head. He knew the answer. Her favourite earrings were purple. Her favourite bracelet was purple, and her favourite nail polish was purple.


The rest of their meal they talk about current events, and things that have happened she couldn't remember, and then they sit for a quiet car ride back home. She peeked at his hands on maneuvering the steering wheel wanting them on her.


When they arrive home, she goes straight into her bedroom showers and jumps into bed.
She lies there thinking about her husband. The want and need for him burning inside of her then suddenly the bedroom door opens. She sees Nathan enter, spread a blanket on the ground, and drop a pillow. He lays down and fixes himself.


"Nathan." She switches on a lamp beside her.


"Yeah." He sits up quickly looking as if he had already been falling asleep. "You okay?"


"Yeah, I'm fine...What are you doing?


He rests his head back down. "Sleeping."


"Yeah but, why on the floor?"


"I know you're not ready for me to be on the bed with you." He closes his eyes.


She gets off the bed and sits near him. "This isn't the only bed in the house."


He opens his eyes and meets her gaze. He then reaches out and caresses her cheek. "This is the only way I can get sleep. I just want to know you're safe love."

"Have you been in here every night?"

He nods, picks up her hand, and kisses it.

The hairs on her body stood on end. "You must really love me huh?"

He freezes. He was flabbergasted. He didn’t expect that… but he could no longer hide from himself. "I do."


She became hypnotized. Her head leans down, and her lips touch his.


He cups her head holding on to her hair. The relief and pure pleasure he felt was indescribable. A moan escapes him when he puts his other hand around her back and lays her down on the ground.

He continued to kiss her roughly deepening it more and more. Then suddenly he pulls away from her while breathing harshly. He stands himself up and sits on the bed trying to calm his panting.


She didn't know what hit her. The need and want she felt from him was intense. With heavy breaths, she pants his name. "Nathan."



He holds his hand up as if he was telling her to stop. "Don't. This already isn't easy for me." He gets up quickly scoops her up and drops her on the bed. He covers her up tightly and hits the switch off the lamp. He then lays back down and tries to calm himself.


"Why?" Sabrina whispers after a few minutes with sadness in her voice.


A harsh breath escapes him. "Sweetheart." He pauses having to think of a reason why he couldn't be with her. "Sweetheart I don't think you're ready yet. I think you need to rest and to heal more."


The room is silent for a few moments. "You could at least sleep on the bed."


"Are you sure?" He was desperately wanting to.


"Yes, I'm sure."


He gets up and hops into the bed with her. She moves down toward the end of the bed and turns her back towards him.

She was hurt. She put herself out there wanting his affections, and he turned her down.


"Sabrina." He calls in the darkness. "Please don't be distant with me."


"Goodnight Nathan."


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