Chapter 35

Unedited...

A few days pass with Sabrina spent it mostly outside.

Nathan spent almost his entire day in his office, leaving her to dwell on what happened the other night.. The way he kissed her told her that he wanted her, but the amount of distance that he put between them since then was like they lived in different continents.
She didn't understand, he was her husband. Didn’t he want to get back to some sort of normal.
Shouldn't he want to be closer to her? Especially because of her near death experience. When she found his eyes on her, they told her that he loved her, that he wanted to protect her. He seemed as if he was hurting but he still kept his distance. She was starting to feel that something was off.

She was out in the back patio scanning around at all the trees and greenery. Was this really her life?

The sound of a moving car causes her to turn and look at a black SUV moving up her driveway.


"It's my sister and the children." Nathan's deep voice comes from behind. "I tried to stop her, but she wouldn't take no for an answer.


She turned around and he was mere feet from her. His hands were his pocket and he had a softness in his eyes.
He reached out unexpectedly and lightly moved hairs that were being blown onto her cheek by the gentle breeze.

It was like electricity coursing through her body. She inhaled deeply. This was the first time in days he looked her straight in the eyes.

"Auntie Sabrina!" Alyssa runs straight to her and latches onto her legs.


She hugs her back and then hugs Dylan and little Emmie. She as very confused. She squints up at her husband in confusion. His eyes were already on her. She was so caught up in what was going on in her life she hadn’t even thought once, about Nathan's family.



"We've missed you so much. Where have you been?" Dylan asks still putting pressure on his tight grip around her leg. Sabrina bows her head. These children knew and loved her.


"Is it true you were hurt?" Alyssa interjects.

"Where did you hear that?" He saves Sabrina from having to answer that.

"I heard mommy talking to Aunty Baylee on the phone."


Nathan clenches his jaw. He then turns his attention on both of his sisters who have just joined them onto the patio.


"Why the hell are you sharing private information I choose to share with you?" His anger glare was towards Clarissa.


"Nathan I..." Clarissa inserts.


He shakes his head. "No. Inside now." He begins walking into the house. "You too Baylee." He throws over his shoulder like he seen the look his sisters shared.


Once they get into Nathan's office, he moves around and sits at his desk. He glares at his two sisters with folded arms.


"What are you doing here Baylee?" His eyebrow rises.


Clarissa moves to stand in front of Baylee wanting to silence the smart comment that was about to come out of her mouth. "I told her everything, Nathan." Not being able to look at her brother she plays with her fingers and continues on. "I told her about mom and dad's secrets, and about your marriage to Sabrina, and about her memory loss."


His eyes move back and forth between his sisters. He only told Clarissa about Sabrina's condition because her children were asking for her. He worked really hard to keep all of this out of the press. He knew he shouldn't have said a thing. The last thing he needed right now was Baylee getting Sabrina upset, or suspicious.

"She has a right to know." Clarissa states in the silence. "This involves all of us."


"Baylee." He calls her sternly, focusing his glare there. When his little sister looks him in the eye, he gives her a stern look. "Behave." He orders. He then gets up, moves around both of them, and reaches for the handle.


"Wait." Baylee stops him in his tracks.


"You want us to pretend that she's really your wife and not a gold digger?"


"Baylee now is not the time or place." Clarissa hisses at her sister.


Nathan's left eyebrow lifts straight up, and his jaw tightened. "Watch your mouth. If you came here to start trouble, I suggest, you leave now."



"No, no, no, she didn't come here for that." Clarissa gives Baylee a hard push. "We came to see how Sabrina's been doing, and the kids won't stop asking me to see her."


"I don't get it. Why are you trying to protect this girl?" Baylee keeps pressing Nathan for answers.


Nathan was happy to notice not everything he spoke to Clarissa was public knowledge. He was also really annoyed with both his sisters. "That doesn't concern you." He throws back.


"I mean they were blackmailing us for money. Why even bother with her? Who cares if she was almost killed she brought it on herself ."



"Baylee." He shouts and grinds his teeth.


"And here you are going out of your way to protect her. To pretend you're really married. For what?"


"Sabrina doesn't want money." He tries to remain calm.


Clarissa’s eyes go big. She was looking at her siblings waiting for a bomb to go off.


"I'm sure she's saying anything to keep you. Are you sure she even lost her memory?"


"That's enough!" His voice practically shakes the roof. “You can keep it up and leave.” Without another word he turns around and walks out to look for Sabrina. When he finds her, of course she's outside playing with the children. She was blindfolded with her arms stretched straight out trying to feel little bodies. The sight of her instantly calmed him.


Even with the blindfold on her face, she lit up. She looked happy for once lately. He watched her from his office window over the last few days. She would gaze at the animals always seeming to be in deep thought, always like a weight was on her shoulders.


Suddenly Alyssa runs behind his legs and yells "Aunty Sabrina!"


Sabrina changes direction and heads straight towards them. She reaches her arms out, and slowly glides towards them feeling the air between her fingers.


"Auntie Sabrina!" Alyssa shouts again.


Finally, her fingertips touch something. Definitely too tall to be a child. She instinctively moves her hands down a little. Arms suddenly wrapped around her waist.


She gasps loudly and rips off the blindfold, her eyes come into contact with his.

He smiles lightly.

It became one of those moments. The ones where everything in the world around you stops and nothing matters but the person you're seeing is right in front of you. They both were in a trance for longer than a moment when Sabrina looks at Nathan's mouth, sending him the signal of wanting. She bites her lips and almost leans in.


He clears his throat and takes a step back. The trance was broken. She felt empty suddenly. She goes back to her game, trying to forget, but the whole time, her mind was in what just happened.
Why is he so distant?


She didn't believe his reasoning about her needing more rest. That couldn't be it. She didn’t need to rest to receive a kiss. So why was he going out of his way to make sure and keep distance between them?
She wanted to move on from the incident she couldn't remember anyway, but for some reason, he seems to want to keep it front and center. If she wasn't mistaken, he was using it to keep her at arms length. But why? Her overall contemplating kept resulting in that question.


Was she a different person than she was before she lost her memory? Is there something wrong with her behavior? Maybe he doesn't like who she is now, or maybe she is just overthinking, and it's just because the children were around them.


After about an hour of playing outside. They all move into the house and sit around the spacious living area. Nathan sat beside her, and Clarissa and Baylee sat across. The children were running around playing some game they invented.



"How have you been?" Clarissa asks while looking at Sabrina with concerned eyes.


"I've been ok. Just a little bored." Sabrina noticed Baylee roll her eyes and crossed her arms. Something seriously didn't sit right on her stomach. She look over at Nathan and noticed his arms on the sofa behind her, and he kept two inches away making sure not to touch her.


"Jacob sends his best." She distracts her from her thoughts.


"Thanks,” her mind was elsewhere. She couldn't hold a conversation unless it was about why her life was so strange at the moment.


As the siblings continued talking a conversation started on their parents, she started to wonder if maybe Nathan was lying about something. Maybe their marriage wasn't what he's been saying it is.


Is this how their marriage was two people who barely see or spend anytime together, and if it isn't then why is he trying to keep a distance between them? She asked if he loved her, and he said he did, but he's actually never said the words. Maybe he doesn't maybe he fell out of love a long time ago. He wasn't a one women kind of guy maybe he's just not interested as she is. To her, this marriage is brand new, to him, it's over two years old. Maybe he was just trying to spare her feelings.



Deliberately she leans over and drops her hand on his thigh. She wanted to study his reaction it was the only way she could get a feel of what was going on in his head. She also didn't remember their marriage and wanted not to feel like two strangers living in a lonely home.


The moment her hand touched his thigh he flinches a little removes his hand from behind her neck and grabs her hand. He then kisses it and places both of their hands on his thigh. All that told her is that he wanted control of where her hand was. It stays like for the rest of their talk.


The kids began to complain of hunger, so Clarissa took them into the kitchen as well as Baylee.


As soon as they left the room Nathan stands up.

He looks down at her still sitting. "Get some rest. They will be leaving once the kids are fed."


He grabs both of her hands and leads her to the staircase making sure she heads to bed. If Sabrina wasn't mistaken, he didn't want to to spend any time alone with his sisters.


Later that night, she took a shower and two sleeping pills but couldn't fall asleep. She had this horrible feeling something wasn't right.
As she lays there in the darkness with her mind racing, Nathan finally comes to bed. He slips in quietly a few feet away from her.


"Was our marriage always like two strangers living together?" She asks in the darkness.


He turns on his side to face her. "No."


"Am I different than before?"


"No." He says again.


Sabrina turns to face him only seeing the outline of his body.


"Then why are you deliberately pushing me away?"


"Sabrina, sweetheart I don't mean to. I just." He lets out a breath. "I think you need time."


"Time for what exactly?"


"Time to heal. Time to get to know me and your life."


"Heal?" Sabrina's voice raises some. "That's bull, and you know it. I am healed. Time to get to know you? You've given me barely any of your time, and I believe I've shown you more than once that I would like to spend time with you. Why are you keeping our lives in limbo? I want to move passed this, have some sense of normalcy."

He was unresponsive. All she hears are the sounds of his light breathing, switching on the light and she finds him sleeping.





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