Chapter 581
Katelina picked up the turquoise ensemble. She could pacify Sarah by agreeing to wear it, and she almost did, but one look at the tiny top stopped her. Had she borrowed it from the contortionist?
"Maybe we should dress as something else? A queen could be fun."
"That's what Kali is going as."
Katelina stopped from saying "So?" and went for, "You guys have gotten really friendly."
"Why shouldn't we? You're only scared of the twins because they look different."
Katelina leaned close and dropped her voice. "You're one to talk. You're scared of a kid because of the way she looks."
Sarah gritted her teeth. "It has nothing to do with that. It's because she sees everything. How are you supposed to face someone who knows all your darkest secrets? What's your excuse for Tol and Ren?"
"I've told you: because one of them is always picking my brain when I'm near them."
Sarah scoffed. "That's the best you can do? They aren't mind readers."
"Either they are, or it's Kali doing it."
"Why would she read your mind? You think everyone is hostile."
Katelina choked. "Me? You're the one who keeps trying to kill people because you say they're going to attack you."
"What's your deal? Are you trying to start a fight with me?"
"No!" Katelina noticed the others had stopped their work to stare. "Never mind. Let's do the costumes."
Sarah threw the latest set at her. "Fine. Try that on."
Katelina held the tiny pants and even tinier shirt. A quick look around the room showed furniture and women trying to pretend they weren't listening, but no place to change. "Where?"
"It's just girls in here." Sarah suddenly seemed to understand. "Oh for crying out loud, you aren't over that yet?"
Katelina gaped. "You mean in six months? No, I haven't changed that much."
"It seems like you have. I barely recognize you."
"And I barely recognize you. You're secretive, paranoid, and angry all the time."
Marna cleared her throat loudly, but it didn't help.
"You think I'm angry?" Sarah nearly shouted. "I'm not angry, Kate, I'm furious! They took everything away from me. My future, my dreams, my job, my life. For Christ's sake, my boyfriend is dating my best friend's mother!"
"I thought you were all right with it?"
Sarah scoffed. "I was never 'all right' with anything. I accepted it. What else was there to do? I thought this was some dark curse that turned us into monsters cringing on the outskirts of society, so Brad leaving me was for the best. How could he want a monster? But when you were human, you were fine with it. You ran away from home with a monster!"
Katelina's hands tightened on the belts. "Jorick isn't a monster!"
"Of course he is. Just like me, just like you, just like everyone in this goddamn house! We're all fucking monsters, Kate. Only you don't seem to give a damn about it."
"Me? You're the one who ripped your own coven to pieces!"
Sarah's eyes went wide and the blood drained from her face. Her mouth worked, though no words came out. Finally she sputtered, "That prick read it in my mind, didn't he? And he told you." Sarah flung the pile of clothes at her. "Don't you judge me, don't you dare goddamn judge me! Where were you while I was locked in a fucking cage like an animal?"
"Like you're the only one bad shit happened to? You have no idea."
"I know about the handful of things that happened to you, about the way your shining hero stormed the gates to rescue you. Where the hell was my goddamn hero? Where was my white knight to make things better? I've never had one. My whole damn life I've been alone, but not you. No! Poor sad little Katelina, poor pathetic little thing with her mommy who loved her, who would have helped her pay for college, with her dad who would have been perfect and devoted if he hadn't died, with her pretty princess life. You didn't have to hide in a goddamn wardrobe. You didn't have to explain bruises and broken arms. You didn't have to live under your father's reputation. Do you know how many jobs I missed getting when they realized I was related to him? How hard it was to do anything? You've always had it all, while I slumped behind in the mud and I'm sick of it!"
Sarah lunged. Katelina ducked and her friend crashed into the table, sending cloth, glitter, and paint flying. The other vampiresses cried out and Marna shot out of her seat. "Ladies!"
Sarah picked herself up and wiped glittery paint from her face. "This is your fault! They took me because they were looking for you. You, who were busy having sex with a monster! I'm a casualty of your goddamn romance and you don't care!"
"Stop this!" Marna cried.
Sarah sprang again. This time Katelina met her. She grabbed Sarah's arms and twisted them behind her back. Sarah roared and struggled, but Katelina forced her to the floor and stuck her knee in her back. "How the hell do you know what I care about? I've spent the last six months feeling guilty that you were dead, that you suffered! The shadow of it tainted everything, including my relationship with Jorick. It was always there, a reminder of what it cost to be with him. What more do you fucking want?"
Sarah bucked and writhed. "You felt so goddamn guilty but you never looked for me. You left me to die. Just like everyone else!"
Marna grabbed Katelina's arm. "Stop this! Both of you!" She looked to Annabelle for backup.
Katelina pulled free, and Sarah rolled away. She rose on her haunches, ready to spring, her lips drawn back from her fangs. "Don't you touch me and don't you goddamn pretend to care anymore."
Katelina felt a stab of sympathy, but it faded when Sarah added, "Just stay away from me, you and your asshole boyfriend!"
"Fine. You want to go it on your own? Have fun. Maybe Des will help you, until he gets bored and dumps you like he did Torina. Good luck filling her shoes."
She didn't wait for the rebuke, but turned on her heel and stormed out. She was sick of thissick of Sarah blaming her; as if she'd told Troy to do it. Things were better when she was dead!
She stopped to lean on the wall, shocked at her own thoughts. What kind of horrible person would think such a thing? Maybe Sarah was right. Maybe
No. Logic said what happened wasn't her fault. Still, in the background was her ever present guilt. She'd seen Sarah's memories, experienced the horror. She understood her anger, but to drag Jorick into it, to throw her childhood in her face, as if she was terrible for having a mother who cared about her?
She tried to tell herself it was Sarah's hurt lashing out, but it was hard to take. Sarah said to stay away, and maybe that was for the best. There were only two days left of this mess, then they didn't have to see each other anymore.
The thought left her heartbroken.
