CHAPTER 34 “PROPER CLOSURE”

PRESENT DAY...

"I-I'M sorry," was all Jenny said then carefully withdrew her own arm from Jason.

"Will you be willing to talk to me now?" the young man calmly asked her a moment later.

Jenny nodded. "Over dinner and not here in your room," she said fixing herself then left the room.

They were both silent while eating. Jenny is confused but she doesn't want to be obvious. Dinner ended and they didn’t talk. That's the reason that she thought so Jason invited her to stay on the terrace to catch some air. She did not refuse.

"Jen?" the young man as she remained silent and just stared at the dark sky.

"Yes?" she said not looking at the young man.

"Ara is gone," he said.

With what Jason said, Ara quickly turned to look at the man seating beside her.

"What do you mean Ara is gone?" she asked while in her heart there was the prayer that she would be thinking wrong.

Then Jason turned to her and met her eyes. "I tried to find you before but I failed. It's been a year since she died. She got Dengue," Jason said almost in a whisper.

Jenny quickly swallowed at what the young man said. She could not speak and instead spontaneously felt her tears flow.

When Jason hugged her she didn't refuse. Now she wants to regret everything that happened and she did. She was in a hurry with all her decisions as well as her wanting to finish everything that she and this man have had because of a simple letter. To the point that she even left and resist her own best friend.

Why is it that she just now realized everything?

Why didn't she give Jason a chance to explain when he went to their house? And why did she think that everything he said was just a lie?

She is a smart woman. But in love she became stupid so she was able to give everything. And when she was hurt, the pain she felt blinded her heart and eyes as well as her mind to see from all angles. To see the truth and to consider all possible causes?

Maybe it was even better?

Maybe before Ara died she was still with her?

"Are you okay?" in a kind tone Jason asked her as she slipped out of its embrace while wiping away her tears.

She just nodded and then looked up at the young man. "Forgive me," was all she could say.

That was when his beautiful eyebrows rose. "You did nothing wrong to me. The truth is that I'm the one who owes you a lot, isn't it?"

Jenny shook her head then forced a smile and bowed her head. "Do you think Jason, if the way I thought then was the same as now, something could change the situation?" she asked.

"Do you really want to talk about it? Because if you would ask me, I should be the one to apologize and explain to you. I hurt you, but I hope you don't think that I didn't love you and just used you to forget my feelings for Ara. Because the truth is, you made me realize what is the difference between true love and a simple admiration is," Jason explained.

Whether she was thrilled so she smiled because of what the young man said Jenny is not sure. But she knew that she felt happy in what she heard while on the other part of her heart, there was the remorse that she had better put aside first.

"It's okay, I want to talk about it. I also don't want to be so angry whenever I see you. We're not kids like before," she explained.

A sweet and amused smile tore from Jason's lips before he opened his mouth to speak.

"The truth is the night I came to see you I wanted to fix everything. I really had no plans to let you go but I felt that you were very angry with me and I can't blame you. Ara is your best friend, it's not right that you read that letter. I also don't know if it was right that I kept it a secret or that I should have said it?"

Jason's words were meaningful and Jenny got what it meant.

"Whatever I choose it's either you will be hurt or I will be unfair to you. But just like I said before, you taught me what the true meaning of love is and what makes it different from a simple admiration that I've proven what I really feel for Ara."

When she didn't speak Jason continued.

"I really planned to court her but that happened when I didn't know you yet. I just didn't really realize that I'm in love with you because I thought the jealousy I felt before for your classmate was normal. After all, you're my friend. But believe me, I've never felt so much alarmed with what you made me feel compared to when I see Daniel and Ara together. And even when we broke up, I don't know how that happened but that's the truth. I carry in my chest the intense guilt for hurting you. I know you love me so much, and I tried not to hurt you. But sometimes destiny really makes two people hurt each other," Jason said.

Jenny nodded then sighed. "Isn't it funny? Something happened to us already but it is just now that we have had what seems like a proper closure," she said with a soft laugh.

Jason just smiled at what she said so she continued.

"I'm sorry if I blinded myself to the anger and pain that I felt. I didn't let you explain. But you know what really hurts me now? I found out that Ara is gone. But because I'm sure she is with Daniel already, somehow the guilt that I feel has been lessened. Because even though she didn't know, I included her in our problem so I left her," Jenny said truthfully.

"Ara doesn't know anything, at all, I didn't tell her that. I just said we had a problem. But she was sad when you suddenly disappeared. She said the pain she was feeling seems to be doubled because her husband had just died."

Jenny's eyes warmed again at Jason's words but she suppressed her own emotions.

"Tell me, did Ara have had a boyfriend again?" she asked.

She hopes somehow that after Daniel dies and even before she dies, Ara found a new love.

Jason shrugged his shoulders.

"There was, but they didn't take long. Ara had a boyfriend before she died but that also didn't replace Daniel in her heart. That man is now the husband of her twin sister."

"What?" Jenny asked incredulously as her eyebrows met.

"It's a long story but Ara is actually the one who did all that."

Jenny smiled. “She’s really a matchmaker,” she said.

Jason nodded. "Have you forgotten what she did with Daniel back then? That's why Daniel invited us to their house because they want to bring us closer?"

Jason's words touched Jenny's heart as she thought she would never forget that memory. The young man picked her up early so her mother offered him to have breakfast at their house. That was the first time he tasted her marinated Daing Bangus which he liked so much.

A little later there was a moment of silence. Jason then grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently.

"Are you still mad at me now? Huh, Jenny?" he asked her.

That was when turned to the young man and smiled. "Come with me sometime, let's visit Ara? And Daniel also? Is that okay?" instead she answered then stared meaningfully at the young man while she still had the sweet smile on her lips.

When Jason probably got what she meant he just hugged her tightly. "Sure, anything for you," he replied then released her and kissed her on the forehead.

"I'm sorry if we had to wait for ten years just to have a proper closure," that was true inside her. And now she can say she feels more relieved.

"It's worth it sweetheart, it's worth it," Jason replied touching her face then pressed a kiss to her lips.

Jenny doesn't know what they actually have now so she seems to be losing the ability to wean the young man from his audacity again. But if there was one thing she was sure of, the ten years of bitterness and grief were over.

Even if it took that long, as Jason said, it's still worth it because she's more mature now, compared to the former Jenny who suddenly erupted like a volcano.

That is exactly what happened to her.

She has always been very understanding and patient. She loved Jason so much and she forgot about herself. And that was the reason why she was so angry when she read that letter.

Did she become immature? She does not know. All she knew then was that she was hurting in addition to losing her trust in the young man.

But now, everything seems easier. She seemed more okay, that was despite all the arguments they had had before.

Nothing is indeed left out of a good conversation. It just needs a wider understanding and calmer emotion.