Chapter 76

Kharis POV


I stared at the pregnancy test strip ma Cleopatra had bought for me. What if I was really pregnant? Well, if I was, I didn't know what I would do. Not yet. Ma Cleopatra explained all of Frederick's actions including how he decided to choose his men over the redemption of his parent's wealth.


Nevertheless, I was still angry and hurt. I was hurt by the fact that there was no transparency and honesty in our relationship. I began doubting the possibility of Frederick ditching Ivy on the wedding day if the whole scandal with Lois had not happened.


I frowned at how complicated my life had become. I covered my body fully, with the duvet. The pregnancy test strip was on the table and I still stared at it. Thinking about doing the test made me scared even more. I needed support but I was shy to even reach out to Ma Cleopatra.


I envisioned a little white angel standing on my right angel and a little devil standing on my left shoulder, just as I see in movies.

'What if it comes out positive'? The white angel-voiced out.


'Do an abortion. You do not want to keep the baby', the devil voiced out.


Haaa, I screamed aloud. There was no way I was going to kill the baby. I wasn't going to do to an innocent baby what my parents attempted to do to me.


'You are not thinking of hurting the lovely child inside of you right', the white angel assumed.


'Do you even have the means of supporting a baby? You do not have a house, working visa, or a job', the little angel said.


I shook my head at the thought. Of course, the devil always has a way of making you perceive bad as good, and good as bad.


"Stop it Kharis, you are not pregnant", I assured myself.

I wondered what would have been Frederick's reaction if he knew I was pregnant. Instead of thinking and being overly anxious, I decided to go to the bathroom to do the test.


I dragged my foot to the bathroom, holding the strip in my hand and saying a silent prayer.


"Kharis, are you done with it", I heard ma Cleopatra yell from outside.


"I'm almost done", I yelled back, squeezing my face.


I got into the bathroom and observed the environment before dropping the test strip on the surface of the sink. I took off my pants and peed into a tiny container. Walking back to the sink, I picked up the container and walked to the toilet to sit on it.


I fixed the strip into the container and waited for seconds. I stamped my foot as I waited. Two minutes had gone and no line had shown. I became confused and looked at the strip's pack. It made me understand that if no line showed, then, it meant it was invalid.


The test strip had finished and my test was in vain. Ma Cleopatra was the perfect person to explain everything and unconfuse me.


I left the bathroom and went to my room to pick up my phone and begin the search for Cleopatra.

"Ma Cleopatra?", I called out loudly as I locked my bedroom door.


First of all, I went to the kitchen but she seemed to not be there.

"Ma Cleopatra"?, I called out again, for the second time.


Just as I was about to head outside to see if she was on the balcony or around the door, she walked into the house from outside.


"What's wrong?, You look pale"?, She said, dropping the pair of secateurs on the table. I figured she must have been trimming the flowers outside the house.


"I must have done the test wrongly", I whispered.


She laughed and asked why I was whispering.

"I do not want Chris to know I am trying to do a pregnancy test", I said shyly.


"C'mon, he wouldn't judge you", she said.


I was silent for a while and then she asked me "how did the test go"?, And began walking away to the kitchen.

"I need to wash my hands", she muttered and smiled at me.


"Okay. So, I peed inside a container and inserted the test strip into it. I know I waited for a long time, probably two or three minutes", I said, demonstrating with my hands.


"Okay", she said, nodding her head to imitate a response.


"There was no line on the strip, not even a faint one, and I do not know why", I said in frustration.


"Is this the first time you are doing a pregnancy test", she asked while cleaning her already washed hands with a towel.


"Yes. This is my first time", I answered.


"It's possible you did not carry out the test properly. Maybe we should try again"?, She asked.


"Yes of course. When would you be able to get another strip"?.


"Probably tomorrow", she answered, with a smile. And then, I remembered tomorrow is also Frederick's wedding. I couldn't believe he was going to be out of my life and reach, officially. My face dropped and sadness mode was activated.


"Tomorrow is just fine. We could do it together so I do not mess up again", I answered.


"I'll go to the room now", I said and excused myself.

It was really hard!!! I missed my baby and I needed him. But I had to wake up to reality, he was getting married.


I listened to Sam Smith's music as I stared at the ceiling.


'You must think that I'm stupid

You must think that I'm a fool

You must think that I'm new to this

But I have seen this all before


… I'm never gonna let you close to me

Even though you mean the most to me

'Cause every time I open up, it hurts

So, I'm never gonna get too close to you

Even when I mean the most to you

In case you go and leave me in the dirt


… But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry

And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry

And every time you walk out, the less I love you

Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true


… I'm way too good at goodbyes

(I'm way too good at goodbyes)

I'm way too good at goodbyes

(I'm way too good at goodbyes)


… I know you're thinking I'm heartless

I know you're thinking I'm cold

I'm just protecting my innocence

I'm just protecting my soul


… I'm never gonna let you close to me

Even though you mean the most to me

'Cause every time I open up, it hurts

So, I'm never gonna get too close to you

Even when I mean the most to you

In case you go and leave me in the dirt


… But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry

And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry

And every time you walk out, the less I love you

Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true'.


I knew I wasn't Worth Frederick in the beginning and that evening, I was reminded about it all over again.