Scared

**Chrissy**

“Babe, how do you mean?” Dayle pulled away softly as I sat up, switching on the lights. His eyes fixed on me with total confusion, but I set things straight. Things are beginning to look ugly and more like a feral mistake. 
  “Yes, Egsn has got to go. Why are we even hosting him, Dayle? Think about it. He has a mansion, he could lodge in one of the most expensive hotels there is, he could buy a condo on the beach or whatever but he chose to stay here. For what reason?” I asked and scoffed. “Egan has lots of options but he keeps sticking around. Aren't you concerned about it?” I asked. I needed to be sure that we were on the same page.

Dayle rubbed his face across and sighed. 
  “You’re right! Maybe we made a mistake. He doesn't have to live with us, babe!” he calmly said. It was certain that he had thought about it countless times. 
  “We made a mistake and u don't want it that way. We don't, baby. He should leave…” I stated. 
  “But he's my best friend and he will be out before long,” Dayle said.
  “I get it. You are only being nice and you would do the same if Ken needed a place to stay but I don't feel comfortable anymore. I missed how… private our lives were. We enjoyed our space for several years and it feels like we are getting distant.  We already set a high bar for ourselves, let's stick with it…” I said, cradling his face.
I really wanted him to see reasons with me. At least. 
  “Okay baby, is that why yoy tossed my goodnight kiss?” he teased, causing me to chuckle. “I’ll speak with Egan and I… totally get your point. Is that all you want to say?” he asked. 
I nodded. 
Was it all I wanted to say to him? Was it really?
I feel like a bitch not telling Dayle about my encounter with Egan back in college and what happened earlier. 
  “Go to bed, my love! I'll handle this, okay? I love you!” he said and kissed my lips. 
  “I love you too, baby!” I reiterated as we cuddled to sleep. 
If I don't tell Dayle the truth, I will never be at peace with myself. 

…
The next morning, Dayle left for work earlier than he used to. He needed to meet with Dad and Dom for a test drive with a major partnering company. 
While I was cleaning the living room in my regular shorts and tank top, singing to one of Amy Winehouse’s songs, I felt someone’s hand on my waist. 

I jolted and spun instantly, meeting Egan’s sly face. 
He was only wearing sports shorts and nothing above. I took off my voice and the first thing I did was slap him as hard as I could. 
  “What was that for? Don't you ever touch me like that again,” I barked at him and all he did was smirk at me, raking his hair softly. 
  “Why? Why shouldn't I touch you, Chriss?” he asked casually. 
  “Are you kidding me?” I scoffed. “Leave my face, Egan!” I stated. 
  “I'm not, okay?” he snapped with a frown. “I heard you, I heard what you said to Dayle. You want me out that bad? Are you that desperate to throw me away?” he asked, circling me like a damned prey. “After everything that has happened?”
  “Excuse you, nothing happened between us and nothing will, okay? Best believe that, Egan. And since you’ve gotten the memo, LEAVE us alone!” I barked at him, my anger spilling over. 
  “I will, Chrissy. But... you can't blame me for being a dick to you,” he stopped before me. “I haven't gotten over you. I left New York to start all over but I’m still stuck with you. You took with you a part of me that cannot be replaced, Chriss. My life is in your hands, do you understand that?” he paused, his dark gaze piercing my body. I moved away instantly. 
  “Egan, the past remains the past. You and I have nothing in common. I don't love, it's Dayle I love—”
  “And what about me?” he yelled as the gloves in my hands fell. “What about everything, Chriss? How dare you lead me on, break my heart and fucking move on? How?” he asked, raking his hair ferociously. 
  “I’ve loved you since high school. I had good intentions. I thought I found the one—”
  “Yeah, news flash, Egan. You aren't the one. High school was high school. You're a cool guy, we all know that but what you're asking is what I cannot offer. You can't keep trying to make advances no matter how much I push you away. So, im going to tell Dayle what you did. Just leave already…” I grabbed my gloves and when I rose, Egan lunged at me and grabbed my arms tightly. 
  “Tell him what exactly? That I love you? Or I want a life with you? That I tried to kiss you last night? Or almost had sex with you in high school until you chickened out or what exactly are you going to tell Dayle? Do you want to badmouth or what? Tell me, I’m curious!” he chuckled darkly. 
  “Let me go,” I grappled but Egan was stronger and was firm on making his statement clear. 
  “I’ve spent the last five years searching for a girl like you but of course, no one is you. So, you leave me no choice but to fight for you. Tell Dayle whatever you want but if I can't have you, nobody can…”
   “What's going on?” 
Someone interrupted. It was Ken. I didn't hear when he knocked. 
Egan released me while tears crammed the corners of my eyes. 
Ken rushed at Egan to punch him but Egan dodged deftly. 
  “Fucking stay out of it,” Egan warned and ran upstairs, taking two steps at a time. 
Ken scurried over to me and embraced without asking the obvious. 
  “Do we need to calm Dayle?” he asked and I shook my head. 
  “He’s busy. I don't want to bother him because he'd be worried sick and he has work to do,” I said as Ken led me to the nearest couch to sit and calm my nerves. 
  “With what I had seen? Dayle must be told. Egan was all over you and you know that it's not okay, Chriss!” Ken scowled softly. If it was about telling the truth bluntly, Ken was good at it regardless of what we were to each other. 
  “I know,”
  “No, you don't. Ice warned you right from the start, Egan shouldn't leave with you. Why are y'all playing the nice guy when it is obviously not needed?” Ken asked and scoffed. “With what I just saw, Egan isn’t over you and has never been,” he added. 
I sniffed, thinking things through. All I knew was that Egan must leave the house.

Ken dialed Dayle and unfortunately, it didn't go through and so he left a text instead.
I lay on his chest, while he held me warmly. 
  “You don't have to worry, I won't leave you with him,” Ken vowed.  

Later on, when I was fit to speak with Ken, I asked about everything that had been going on with him lately and he said; “Shit was bound to happen,”
The response was iconic to me. It made me sit up straighter, afraid I might be missing something deeply important. 
  “Woah, that's cool, right? How did it go? I've been meaning to ask ever since you vanished,” I teased but my words were sincere. 
  “Ana broke up with me which was expected and she held no grudge—according to what she said,” he heaved a deep sigh and continued. “I loved her decency. She was great at everything she did but I wasn't in love with her,” he admitted. 
My brows tilted slightly, “That means you love Matt?” I asked, knowing fully that the nail had to be hit. 
  “He’s interesting and I’m not totally sure if he's the one,” Ken admitted again looking into the expanse. 
  “Do you regret hurting Ana?” I let out. A part of me was guilty about keeping a secret from Dayle. I mean, he's been honest for all I can remember. 
  “Fuck yeah!” he said, regret lacing his face. “I hate what I did. I shouldn't have,” he admitted. “I tried to apologize to her though. I wish I could undo things,” he said as I sat up, hugging my knees to my chest. “That's why you should no longer hide stuff like this from Dayle though…”
  “He’s gonna go ballistic if I tell him about that one time in college,” my voice shook. 
  “Well, fuck that, Chriss!” he almost flared, turning to me fully. “I… I ruined my relationship with Ana, I fell for someone who was totally out of the picture. And guess, I did that overnight,” he stated, sending back. My thoughts were circling what he meant. 
  “Don't make that same mistake that I made. Confess to Dayle, let him know that Egan has motives,”
  “I'm scared,” 
  “Fucking hell, Chriss! You've got to make a choice. It's either Egan or Dayle,”