Chapter 44

Merigold
I wake up feeling worse than ever before. My nausea is horrible. All of my muscles hurt. I couldn't make it down the stairs without getting dizzy. I have to stop several times and hold on to the wall until it passes. And the worst of all I felt weak, just no energy. I managed to get some toast and ginger ale down and just sat on the couch and watched the twins play.
I wish I had the energy to play with them. Lug Nut and Tank have taken up some of my slack with them but it isn't their job. It's mine, I'm momma. But don't think I'm not thankful for the help that they have given me because I am. I just wish I didn't need it. But I’m going to the doctor today so hopefully, we can figure out what's wrong. I’m hoping for some drawn out flu and not something serious. Like the cancer my dad had. I have stopped calling him Raider recently. It feels like I’m closer to him if I call him dad.
I know Tank is hoping for something small that an antibiotic can fix. He has told me I have some of the same symptoms dad had when he got sick. I know he worries. I hope to give him good news. I’m surprised he isn’t coming with me but he is needed at the tattoo shop today. They have gotten busy since I sent some work their way.
Anna came to pick up Jace and Jax and Tank helped load them up in her car for me. I thanked her and told her I would pick them up before dinner. I wasn't sure how long this appointment was going to take so I wanted to make sure I had plenty of time to do what I had to do. Anna told me not to worry about it. She can always bring them back when I’m done.
I'm sitting in the doctor's office filling out paperwork with Lug Nut sitting beside me. " You don't have to stay. I'm sure you have other things to do." Lug Nut looks at me like I have lost my mind. " First I'm not dealing with Tank's wrath if he found out I left you by yourself. And second, you need someone with you. And I want to know what's going on. And how to take care of you."
" I have told you how grateful I am for you?" I ask him. He puts his arm around me. " That's what friends are for." I owe him and Tank for everything they have done. I don't know how I'll ever repay them. They are definitely getting a special dinner after this. I’m making all of their favorites.
The nurse called my name and we went to the back. They do my weight first and I giggle when Lug Nut turns his back. The nurse says " You have him trained don't you." " Nope, my friend here is just a true southern gentleman." Proud of the respect he is showing me. When the nurse is done writing what she needs she shows us to an exam room. I sit on the exam table and Lug Nut sits in the chair.
We sit for what feels like forever when the doctor comes in. " Ms. Stevens, I'm Dr. Ryans." and shakes my hand. Lug Nut stands " Hey Doc" and shakes his hand. " Lug Nut, good to see you."” Is she one of yours?" I don't know why but the way he said it pissed me off. " She has a name and is sitting right here." I’m not going to put up with that bullshit. I get down off the table intent on leaving. Yea I didn't make it. You guessed it, I fainted.
When I came to, I was laying on the exam table with Lug Nut hovering over me. " Doc, that was disrespectful. I'm sure Tank said she was a Vip. Merigold is Viper's sister." I tried to sit up when I felt hands on me. " Lug Nut. I don't want special treatment because of who my brother is. I just want respect." " Easy Ms. Stevens. Sit up slowly. And Lug Nut is right. I was being disrespectful. I apologize."
I sit up " Apology accepted. Now can you help me figure out why that keeps happening?" Dr. Ryans nods and we go over my symptoms. " I want to run some tests. We will draw blood and urine and go from there. I'll have my nurse come in and get those samples. When she is done I want you to lay here and rest. While we wait for some of the results to come back." he says. I agree because what choice do I have. I can’t keep going on like this. What if I was driving with the twins and this happened. No, I need answers and I will wait as long as it takes.
The nurse comes in and hands me a cup to pee in. I went to the bathroom, give my sample. I leave in the marked cabinet and wash my hands. When I get back to the room the nurse is flirting with Lug Nut. " Did you two want some privacy or did you want to do your job?"
Lug Nut laughs but helps me on the exam table. " I'm happy I could make you laugh. You can wait to fuck her until after you deliver me to Tank. Then you can explain your hurry to him." The nurse’s jaw drops. I hold out my arm for her to draw blood. " Screw up and I will break your nose." The nurse looks at Lug Nut to figure out if I'm joking or lost my mind. " I've seen her do it." is all he says.
I don't care that I'm acting like a bitch. I feel like crap. I've fainted in the office. I'm in no mood to deal with bullshit right now. She needs to do her job and flirt on her own time.
I lay back on the table to wait for the results. I had fallen asleep because Lug Nut was waking me up. I look up and see the doctor has come back. Lug Nut helps me sit up. " I have some results back Ms. Stevens. I think we should discuss them in private." Lug Nut doesn't look happy about it. I nod and let him know it is ok. “ I’m good. I’ll let you know when I’m done.” I say. " I'll be waiting for you outside. Take good care of her Doc." he says and leaves.
It is just me and the doctor now. He sits on a stool and looks at my chart. " First you are anemic. Your iron levels are very low. That explains the fainting and dizzy spells." Ok, I can handle that. Just take an iron supplement. " The reason you are anemic is you are pregnant."
Pregnant! I must have misheard. " I'm sorry but could you repeat that?" " You are pregnant. Judging by these levels at least eight weeks. If not more." "Dr. Ryans you have to be mistaken. That's not possible. After my twins were born there was a complication. They said it would be difficult to conceive again if at all. And we took precautions."
" I want to do an ultrasound to confirm. Then we can talk more." Dr. Ryans says. He leads me to the ultrasound room. Once I'm on the table with my shirt lifted. He rubs the jelly on my stomach. Right now I'm on autopilot. I can't be pregnant. We were safe. The condom must have broken. Who's the father? Do I tell them? It doesn't matter because it isn't true.
After moving the wand around for a minute. Turning this way and that way when he finally says" Here we go. You are pregnant," he says and I look over at the screen. I can't believe what I'm seeing. " Is that?" I can't even finish my sentence. " Yep. That is two embryos. You are having twins." He turns a few nobs. That is when I heard the whoosh whoosh of the heartbeats " Two strong heartbeats. And I was wrong. You are more like twelve weeks along." I think for a second and do the math quickly. Twelve weeks that means. Oh shit, I got pregnant our first night together.
Dr. Ryans helped me clean up. I lowered my shirt and slowly sat up.I was numb. I couldn't think. Dr. Ryans was going on about prenatal vitamins, extra iron, small meals, something for nausea. I had to gain weight. Something about medical history, making another appointment. He escorted me to the receptionist to make my next appointment. I shoved my prescriptions in my purse before Lug Nut could see them. I’m not sure if he would know what they are but I’m not risking it.
Pregnant. Fuck. What am I going to do? Am I going to tell them? No, no I'm not, they made their choice. How am I going to explain this to Viper? I won't be able to hide it for long. He is going to want to know who the father is. I can't tell him because I don't know. I could say it was a one-night stand. He might believe me. Can I raise four kids on my own with no father?
Thanks to my father and my designs, money isn't an issue. And if it does become an issue I could have Viper buy me out of the clubhouse or the garage. But what about emotional support. I wouldn’t have made it through my pregnancy with Jace and Jax if it hadn’t for the support of Mac, Alaric, River and the rest of the guys. Oh god, my father must be rolling over in his grave. What must he think of his little girl now? A tramp that got knocked up and doesn't know who the father is.
I'm broken out of my thoughts `` Merigold?" Lug Nut’s voice is full of concern. I had forgotten he was there. " Everything ok?" I look at him and can't even fake a smile. " It will be. I have to stop by the pharmacy to get some prescriptions." He nods and walks me out to my truck.
The next thing I know is someone is grabbing my shoulder and I hear Lug Nut yell " Merigold Run!" Instinct and training take over and I fight. I elbow the guy who has his hands on me in the side. I turn and follow through with a punch to the gut. But with my body in its weakened condition, it didn't have the power it normally would.
I hear Lug Nut fighting with someone else. The guy in front of me tries to grab me again. I grab his hand and snap it back until I hear a crack. Then bring my leg up to kick him in the stomach. I don't know who these assholes are but I'm not going down with a fight. I tried another punch this time with his nose. I hear it crunch then see the blood. I reach down to get the knife Alaric gave me that I keep in my boot but am met with a fist to the face. I stumble and everything goes black.