Chapter Forty-One - It is a waste of my time.

McKenna
I am annoyed as I arrive home. My boss decided to send me home because I wasn’t needed and without pay the fucker. It is always me who he does this too. I am sure it is because I refuse to kiss his ass and put up with his inappropriate behaviour. There was no point in me going in today. I was only there for two hours. I was tempted to tell him to shove his job up his ass, but I need to hold out for a little longer to see how my interview goes.

I head inside but stop when I hear the sound of a guitar playing and Paxton’s voice singing gently. He must have found his inspiration. I quietly close the door and tip-toe towards the living room. I don’t want him to know I am here, not yet. I don’t want to disturb his creativity. I sit down in the hall and listen to him. I smile as I do. The way he is singing is something I haven’t heard in a long time. The music he writes and plays now for albums, tours and the fans is different from what he used years ago before he left.

I close my eyes and enjoy it. He has such a beautiful voice. His talent for music was one of the many reasons I fell for him all those years ago. The songs he writes now are great, but he is writing them for other people and not himself like he used to. It makes me believe he has lost a part of himself over the years, which is a sad thought. He was incredible. He still is, but part of him is gone.

The place suddenly falls quiet. He must have stopped.

“Um, why are you sitting on the floor?”

The sound of Paxton’s voice makes me jump a little. I look up at him, and he stares down at me with a raised brow.

I rub the back of my neck nervously, “I came in about five minutes ago. I didn’t want to disturb you while you were in the moment.”

“It is just something I was messing with,” he shrugs. What are you doing at home? You were supposed to be working for another five hours.”

“My boss decided to send me home.” I sigh, rolling my eyes.

“Sorry, he is such an ass.” He replies and offers his hand to me.

I took it, and he helped me to my feet. “Whatever it was you were working on was beautiful.”

“Thank you.” He smiles.

I expect a little more from his answer, but I guess he doesn’t want to talk about it. I nod and don’t mention it.

“I didn’t mean to disturb you. I will go to my room and stay out of the way.”

He shakes his head, “Nonsense. You don’t need to do that. I am done for the day.”

I feel guilty. If I didn’t come back early, he would probably have continued.

“Are you sure?”

He nods, “I am. Come on. I will make us some iced coffee, and we can have some chocolate cake. It will cheer you up a bit.”

He smiles and takes my hand. I smile, and he leads us to the kitchen. I sigh and take a seat, letting him do his thing. He made the iced coffees better than me. Once he had everything, he motioned me to follow him to the backyard. I happily followed him. He sets the things down on the table. He waits for me to take a seat before doing so himself.

He slides the plate with the biggest piece of chocolate cake on it.

I look at it and then up at him, “You expect me to at all of that? There is nearly half a cake there.” I snicker.

“I am sure you can manage.” He laughs.

“If I end up sick later, you better be there to hold my hair back and take care of me.”

He rolls his eyes. “You are being a drama queen, but that’s okay. I promise to take care of you if you end up sick.” He chuckles.

I flip him off and take a bite. He smiles and does the same. I am happy he came back. He is better off here than anywhere else.

“Is that song you were working on for a new album?” I ask.

He shakes his head, “No. It was just for me.”

“You miss writing the way you used to, uh?”

He sighs, “Yes, badly, but it isn’t what my company or fans are looking for.”

“Shouldn’t you have more of a say in what you do since you are the lead singer, songwriter and producer?”

I have no idea how it all works, but surely, he has a right to do as he wants.

“It isn’t that simple. I need to do what is best for the band, the charts, the company and the fans. It is better to keep everyone happy.” He shrugs.

I look at him sympathetically. “I’m sorry, Paxton. You don’t have as much creative control as you should. It seems unfair.”

“It is how it works, but let’s not bore ourselves with that.”

He clearly wants to change the subject. I nod and smile, focusing on my cake and coffee. He does the same. The silence between us is not awkward; it is relaxing. It is what I need. I would rather be here than at work. The only downfall of not being at work is the money I will lose. I can’t afford to lose money.

“Paxton, will you teach me how to play guitar?” I ask.

“Really? You don’t remember what happened the last time I tried to teach you?” he laughs.

“That was years ago. I will do better this time.”

“I will teach you as long as you promise not to yell at me and threaten to smash my guitar if I get too firm with you.” He says.

The last time was a disaster. I put the poor guy through hell and blamed him for my not being able to play. I was only a teenager at the time.

I snicker, “I promise to be nice.”

“Okay, my answer is yes. We can start tomorrow.” He smiles.

I grin widely and clap my hands, “Yay! I am excited to try again. Thank you.”

It may not take, but I am willing to give it another try. He is an amazing guitar player and the best person to teach me. As long as he is patient with me. I don’t want us to end up fighting over it.

“What are friends for.” He says, smiling, but the rest of his face tells me that being only friends isn’t something he wants.

He will be over whatever it was we had in no time. We both will be.