Chapter Nine - It all very confusing.

Paxton

I only slept for about two hours last night. I had too much going around in my mind. What McKenna said to me didn’t help. She believes it means nothing. I don’t know if I am offended or I don’t want to admit to myself she is right. Have I been getting these stranger feelings for her because I am lonely and seeking comfort? Or are they real, even if they are lustful more than anything else? It must be something because I wouldn’t risk my friendship with my best friend for nothing. I don’t tend to give a damn about many people these days, but Carter is one person who I have always cared about. The only person in my life I trust doesn’t treat me any differently like everyone else. Mckenna falls into the category, too. I care for her and trust her. Everything is confusing as hell.

I hate not being in control of things. It stresses me out. I am tempted to pour a little whisky into the coffee cup in front of me, but I shouldn’t. Carter and McKenna were still asleep. It is not even seven, so I didn’t expect them to be up. Carter will be up soon to head to work. I am not sure if McKenna has work today.

I sigh and take a sip of my coffee. I hear someone coming downstairs, and I hope it is Carter. I want to try to avoid McKenna for today. I am sure she probably doesn’t want to see me either.

I divert my eyes to the kitchen door to see who it is. I sigh when McKenna comes into view. She glances up and meets my eye, stopping in place, and we stare at each other for a moment. She breaks eye contact first and comes into the kitchen.

“Morning,” she mumbles as she pours herself some coffee.

“Morning,” I reply softly.

McKenna keeps her back to me longer than necessary. I hear her take a deep breath and finally turns to me, “Why are you up so early?”

“I couldn’t sleep. You?”

“I woke and couldn’t get back to sleep. I do have work, but not until eleven.”

I smile and nod, taking a sip of my coffee. There is an awkwardness in the air. She smiles softly at me and disappears outside. I take a deep breath of my own and follow her outside. McKenna is sitting by the pool, her feet in the water. I stroll over and sit next to her.

“Are we okay?” I ask.

She turns to face me, “I don’t know, are we? You tell me? You were the one who rushed off without explanation.”

I can hear the nervousness in her voice.

“Yes, because I didn’t know what else to say.”

“There was nothing else to say. What happened, happened, and it can’t happen again.” She shrugs.

I know she is right, but that doesn’t stop a part of me from wanting it to happen again.

“No, it can’t,” I reply.

Just like in the kitchen, we keep eye contact and do not say another word. McKenna swallows hard and licks her lips. I don’t think she realises, but I find myself mirroring her. My eyes flicker between hers and her lips. Fuck! I want nothing more than to close the space between us and claim her lips as mine.

“W-w-why are you looking at me like that.” She whimpers.

I find myself scooting closer and resting my hand on her thigh. She shudders under my fingers.

“I don’t know,” I whisper.

McKenna’s cheeks turn red. I chuckle because I find it cute when she blushes around me. She glares at me when I laugh. I reach up, tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear, and brush my fingers over her cheek as I pull away, causing a soft whimper to escape from her pretty pink lips. I stop from smirking.

“What are you doing, Paxton?” she asks softly.

I run my fingers through my hair, “I have no fucking idea. I am confused as hell.” I reply honestly.

“Confused about what?”

I open my mouth to reply, but before I can.

“Who is up?”

The sound of Carter’s voice makes me put a distance between us.

“Both. We are outside having coffee.” I reply.

McKenna sighs loudly from next to me. Carter appears and comes to join us.

“I know why I am up early; it’s because I have work. Why are you two up at this time?” he chuckles.

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“I woke and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I decided to get up,” McKenna answers.

“Is everything okay?” he asks and looks between us.

We smile and nod. Not wanting to say much in case he realises we are lying.

“I am going to make some breakfast. Does anyone want some? I am thinking pancakes?” McKenna says and gets to her feet.

Carter nods, “Yes, please. You make the best pancakes.”

“Paxton?”

“Sure. Can I help?” I ask.

She shakes her head, “No, I have it.”

McKenna disappears inside. Carter and I finish our coffees and head inside, too. Carter goes to grab a quick shower before breakfast is ready. I wait until I know the coast is clear, walk over to McKenna and stand behind her, my body close to hers.

“Are you sure I can’t help?” I whisper in her ear.

A small squeak comes from her lips, “No. It is fine.” She breaths out.

I place my hand on her hip, and she shudders the same way she did outside, “If you change your mind, let me know.”

She only nods in response. I smirk and pull away. I should stop. I said ten minutes ago that nothing else could happen between us, yet I find myself teasing her a little. I am sure I am making her more confused with my actions.

I hop up on one of the stools and watch her cook. I may or may not be checking out her ass, curves and legs. I groan quietly. What is she doing to me? Why now? Why is this happening now? I have never looked at her differently before now.

“Paxton, stop staring at me. I can feel your eyes burn into me.” She says, glancing over her shoulder at me.

I shrug, “I don’t know what you mean.” I say with a chuckle.

She rolls her eyes at me before turning back to making breakfast.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, dimples,” I warn.

She quickly flings herself around and folds her arms across her chest, “Or what?” she asks.

“Do it again, and you will find out,” I reply smugly.

Her eyes widen, and she blushes, quickly turning away from me. I laugh loudly at her reaction. I don’t think she was expecting a comeback quite like that. I couldn’t help myself.

I decide whether to go over to her or not. It may be a little risky because Carter doesn’t take long in the shower. No, I should stay put for now. I can’t have Carter catching me even as much as flirting with McKenna; he will punch me. Though, I may have a little fun with it once he leaves for work.