Chapter Forty-Five - Too embarrassed.

McKenna

I have been awake for an hour. I am hungover, hungry and need caffeine, but I don’t want to go downstairs. I don’t remember much from last night, but one thing I do is throwing myself at Paxton and then taking the huff when he rejected me. I didn’t think he would have been waiting up for me. Now, I am embarrassed. I am not ready to face him. I don’t even know when he left my bed, because I am sure he was in it when I fell asleep. I shouldn’t have drunk as much last night. I don’t usually, but I was celebrating, and the people I work with are great. I am now regretting my choice with the amount of alcohol I consumed.

I will eventually go downstairs. I am scared to move in case I am sick. My head is spinning. I wonder if I can sleep all day. No, it will make me feel worse. It is already nearly midday. I snuggle back under the covers, trying to prepare myself to move. I hate hangovers; I can’t handle them.

A knock on my bedroom door makes me groan because the noise hurts my head more. I call out a mumbled come in. I keep an eye on the door and in walks Paxton.

“Hey, sleepyhead, how are you feeling?” he chuckles.

“Like crap. I am never drinking again, and I am not moving out of bed today. Last night is a blur.” I lie.

Paxton doesn’t need to know, and I remember acting desperate towards him. I would rather not relive it. He has a tray in his hand and comes over to sit on the edge of my bed.

“Here. You will need all of this.” He smiles.

I take the tray. It contains pancakes drowned in syrup with sliced fruit on top, bacon, fresh orange juice, coffee, water, and painkillers—everything you need for a hangover.

“Thank you. I wanted to come down, but I worry if I move, I will end up being sick.” I pout.

“Eat and drink up. Take the painkillers, and you will feel better soon.” He encourages.

I nod, “Yes, boss.”

I expect him to leave, but he doesn’t. He climbs onto the bed beside me and gets comfortable, stealing a strip of bacon from my plate.

“Hey! Mine.” I pout.

“I promise not to steal anymore. You don’t remember anything from last night?”

I shake my head and fill my mouth with pancakes before I say something I am not supposed to. I can’t even look at him because he will know that I am lying. I am curious if he will tell me what happened.

“Thank you for brunch, Paxton. I hope I wasn’t too much of a problem last night with my drunken ass.”

“No, you were fine.” He smiles, looking away.

It would seem that I am not the only one lying. I smile and continue with my food. I manage most of it and take the painkillers.

“Better?” he asks.

“I am sure I will be. Now, I need to motivate myself to shower.” I whine, slipping back under the covers and pulling them up over my face.

Paxton chuckles, “So dramatic.”

I search for a pillow and throw it at him, “I am not dramatic.”

He laughs loudly, “Sure you aren’t. I will leave you to feel sorry for yourself.”

I wait until he leaves before I come out of the covers. At least my stupidity didn’t make things awkward between us. He hasn’t brought it up, and I hope it stays that way. I need to get my ass into shape and stop feeling sorry for myself.

I hesitantly get out of bed, grab some clean clothes and towels, and head for a shower. My head is spinning, but hopefully, the shower will help. I can hide in there for as long as I need. My hangover will pass, eventually.

****
I had finally found the energy to go downstairs. I head to the kitchen for some water. My mouth is dry as a damn desert, no matter how much water I drink. When I closed the fridge, I jumped and let out a small squeal because I wasn’t expecting to see Paxton standing there. I didn’t even hear him come in.

He chuckles, “Sorry, dimples.”

I glare at him, but it doesn’t last long. I finally notice his wet hair and half-naked body. He must have been swimming. I lick my lips as my eyes run over him. Why does he need to be so sexy?

I finally look back at his face, and he smirks at me. “Enjoying the view?”

I blush, “I don’t know what you are talking about.” I protest.

I quickly turn away from him and raid the cabinets for snacks. I feel him come up behind me. What is he doing? Isn’t my brother home? My breath hitches in my throat when his front presses against my back.

“You were totally checking me out, dimples.” He whispers in my ear, resting his hands on my hips.

I close my eyes and shake my head. I can’t seem to find my words.

“Yes, you were. Admit it.” He says, the warmth of his breath fanning my skin.

I whimper and grip onto the counter, “Paxton, what are you doing?” I stammer out.

“Tell me you don’t miss me.” He rasps, circling his fingers on my hip.

“I don’t,” I reply, not sounding very convincing.

“Turn around, look me in the eye and tell me that.”

I shake my head, “I can’t.”

He uses his hold on my hips and brings me around to face him, trapping me between him and the counter, “Why not?”

I look at the ground, “Because I can’t lie to you when I look you in the eye.”

He places his finger on my chin and tilts my head back, forcing me to look at him, “You do miss me then? You really don’t remember last night?”

“Paxton, it doesn’t matter if I do; we can’t happen again. It is too complicated. It is too much pressure, and I don’t trust you after what happened in New York.”

I watch pain flash in his eyes, “Y-y-you don’t trust me anymore?”

“No. I know we weren’t together, but you picked someone over me the first chance you got. The second a beautiful woman was in front of you, you went for it. I can’t be sleeping with someone who is screwing god knows how many other women at the same time. It may be how your life is, but not mine.” I whimper.

He caresses my cheek, “Kenna, I fucked up, I know I did, and I am sorry. What if I promise only to be with you? Would it make a difference?” he asks softly.

“I don’t know.” I sigh.

I duck under his arm and rush back to my room. I shouldn’t have left my room in the first place. I can’t be with him again, no matter how badly I want to. He could make that promise to me, but what happens the second he has other gorgeous women in front of him, seducing him? There is no chance he would reject them because of me. I can’t put myself in such a position again.