Ch. 10: Sparks
CHAPTER TEN:
By the end of class, I don’t think I could’ve told anyone what we had done the whole time. I felt cold after so much discomfort and as soon as class wound down, I frantically started packing things away. I had some handouts in front of me, I noted to myself to look at them later. A few times during class Bella had tried to talk to me but I could barely speak, feeling like there was a huge weight on my chest, and like my throat was squeezed shut. I made small “mhmm” sounds but couldn’t do much beyond that.
People started standing up and gathering by the door, waiting for the few seconds before the bell. I forced myself up by the door all the way to the left of the crowd. I still felt eyes on me and needed air.The bell rang, the door was opened, and I walked as fast as I could back towards the courtyard, taking in big breaths of the fresh air. Other students started filing out nearby doors, and several gathered at benches along the courtyard walls. I was so determined to get away I didn’t realize exactly where I was until I was mostly there - the area Maxine and Marsha liked to hang at. I slowed down, sat, and put my backpack on my lap. The sun was trying to come out, and I closed my eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun.
“You alright?” a deep voice asked.
I opened my eyes to see Sean a few feet in front of me, walking closer, concern on his face which showed through his smile. I instantly felt a buzz of happiness and electricity in my chest.
Smiling, probably as big as I had in a while, I replied a breathy, “Hey!”
My enthusiastic response seemed to make him happier. Without any prompting he sat next to me on the bench.
“How was class? Looks like it could’ve been… overwhelming?” He was more perceptive than I would’ve guessed.
I thought about being honest with him for a split second but changed my mind. I couldn’t just unload all of that on someone I hardly knew, and I was honestly embarrassed about how terribly I had reacted to something as objectively annoying or uncomfortable as unwanted staring. I settled for a partial truth.
I cleared my throat, “Yeah, you know, there is this guy in a few of my classes that just…” his eyes narrowed following my words, “well, he gives me the creeps. I don’t know what his problem is. My friends tell me that he is just like that - freaky.”
“Hmmm, have you talked to him or anything?” He asked, rubbing his hand on his knee. The knee that was just a few inches from mine. The chatter from everyone around us was fading away.
“No, not at all. Not a word. I really don’t know what his deal is…” I said, turning to fully look at him. He was so close. And he looked so comfortable sitting like this with me, like it was totally natural. The moment I made total eye contact I had just let my thought trail off and it hung in the air between us. This close I could see his full, dark eyelashes that emphasized his piercing green eyes. Flecks of gold mixed in, illuminated by the natural light outside. I noticed we were both just smiling at each other. The world around me could be gone and I wouldn’t notice.
After the pause he said, “Well, you do you, but if you need someone to talk to about this or you want me to talk to him - with or without you there - you can count on me.”
It was suddenly so serious, smiles dropped. I clicked my tongue, trying to bring moisture to my seriously dry mouth. I could feel a tiny touch of his breath on my cheek.
“I’m serious, Rach,” he reached for my hand that had been on my knee, mirroring his. Electricity shot up my wrist to my back, every part of me felt alert and at attention. “You need me, just let me know and I will help any way you would like me to.”
His hand just stayed there, over my hand, on my knee.
“Thanks… Sean, thanks.” Was all I could manage to say.
A voice yelled from a few feet away, calling Sean. He looked up, still holding my hand. A friend of his motioned for him to come over.
“Hold up!” He yelled towards his friends who were gathering. He squeezed my hand for half a second and turned back to me. “Looks like I have to cut this a little short.” He stood up, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. I clocked Masha and Maxine standing by the cafeteria door talking frantically, hand motions all over the place. Facing me, Sean took a step out back into the ocean of students, but stepped back towards me again.
“Hey, could I give you my number so you can let me know if that guy becomes a problem?” Hand outstretched, “I can put it in your phone?”
I beamed at him, “Yeah, sure.” I don’t think I will find myself actually running to a guy about this Vance creep, but my god, he wants to share numbers!
I handed him my cell, opened to the keypad page. He typed in some numbers and hit the ‘call’ button. The phone in his pocket started vibrating and he answered it.
“Yello? Is this Sean? This is Rachel. I’m having some trouble with this creep and want to know what you think I should do?” he said, talking to himself - using both phones, one phone against each ear. Spark in his eyes. “Hmm, oh really huh? Interesting. I’m not sure what good hanging out with you will do, but sure I would love to. What do you want to do?” He went on, my jaw dropped.
“Hey!” I exclaimed, while reaching for my phone, “Give that back!” Laughing at his walkthrough of ‘our’ conversation.
He swayed backwards just an inch to stay out of my reach.
“The beach? After school tomorrow? Yeah, sounds great. See you then,” he spoke, still pretending to be me. “Yes, I will bring snacks. Bye!”
Sean was wagging his eyebrows at me.
I laughed, “Are you serious? Did you jus-”
“Very,” he jumped in response. Small smile, but a determined look in his eye.
He handed me back my phone, sparks of electricity in my palm where his fingers grazed my skin. He turned on his heel, calling back, “See you then!”
He walked away so quickly I couldn’t even tell him there was no way I could attend.
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