Nate Part 2

"I've already banned that demon from entering any college party. All the security guards have been warned. Oh, and there's Pierre, that drug-dealing scumbag. I grabbed him by the neck and slammed him against the wall when I found out Ian had finished the plan and gave the ball invitations to the blue-haired woman, Isa's friend. I screamed in his face that if he gave my girl any drugs, he'd be a dead man. Pierre nearly pissed himself. I can't stop him from selling his crap on my turf, but I can still control him. If I scare him off, someone else will take his place, and I might lose control over someone dealing drugs in a classroom, for example. Pierre is completely limited to only selling at parties. If I find out he's dealing on regular days or in other areas of the college, I'll beat him up and throw him out.
'My father shouldn't have had kids,' Bianca mutters, chugging water straight from the jug without any manners. The way she’s gulping it down like a bottle of cachaça, I’m sure her throat is as dry as the Sahara Desert. 'He’s always been an asshole! He sent one of his kids to a boarding school in the middle of nowhere because the boy wanted attention, like any child would from their father. He can’t take care of his wife, who clearly has some disorder, yet he wants to ruin the only thing that kept Nate okay. I hope Vinicius dies!'
'He's still your father!' my mom snaps, slowly sipping her juice. 'And you shouldn’t talk like that about my husband.'
My father probably doesn't even remember he's her husband. He only comes home once a week. Spends the rest with his secretary.
'Mom...' I rub my forehead, trying to ease the tension building there. 'Why did you want to come here?'
I had to improvise my meeting room for this shitty lunch because my mom insisted on eating with Bianca and me today. I’ve been sleeping most nights in the room here at Revolta, so she called asking to have lunch with Bia and me. As much as Suzana stabs my chest from time to time with her absurd beliefs about me, I still feel guilty ignoring her.
The light-colored room we're in is quiet. Probably the cleanest-looking part of my office. Everything is white, unlike the other places, where I make sure to scatter colorful paintings or graffiti-covered walls everywhere.
'I wanted to see you, son. You haven’t come home anymore. Now all you want is to stay at school,' she says, and her eyes fill with tears. 'I’m afraid to face the fire without you. Sometimes, his spirit haunts me.'
'You know we shouldn’t talk about that!' I try to be patient, to ignore the dark words and the heavy memories her sentence brings, but I end up slamming my hand down hard on the table, making Suzana flinch. 'Mom, you need to stop drinking so much or taking those damn pills.'
'He comes at night. I see him screaming, and then I remember you, son. He put a demon inside you, Nate,' she whispers in a shaky voice, then gets up, looking like she's about to cry.
Here we go...
'Mom, finish your lunch!' I plead, trying not to cry, but I can’t hold it back. I want to scream, break everything, the same way she shatters everything inside me when she treats me like this. The same way she tears me apart when she pushes me away like I’m something tainted.
'I need to go!' she says, then grabs her brown purse and throws it over her frail shoulder.
I try to stay strong, but when Suzana runs out scared, her heels clacking against the laminate floor, after giving me one last look filled with terror and disgust, I let the sobs show the weak piece of shit that I am. I cry, scream in rage, slam my fist on the table, causing a loud bang. I feel the wounds that were starting to heal from punching the wall yesterday reopen.
'Calm down!' my sister shouts, wrapping her arms around my head, her scent of peace flooding over me. 'She’s crazy, Nate. Don’t listen to her. You’re incredible, the only good thing in the hell that is my life.'
'I can’t take it anymore!' I shout, and before I can break free from her, my sister uses some superhuman strength to spin my chair and wrap her arms around my neck.
I let the sadness take over the rage as the horrified and fearful look my mother gave me flashes in my mind. It repeats, screams in front of my eyes, mocking me.
My mother is afraid of me...
'You are loved, kid! I don’t have real parents the same way you don’t. The only person I truly have is my brother. He’s my other half! It’s you!' Bruxinha cries, clinging to my neck. She hugs me so tightly, making it clear she’s terrified of losing me. I rest my forehead on her narrow shoulder, which smells like roses, and allow myself to show the pathetic little shit that I am. 'I love you! Don’t be like this, please! Don’t let this destroy you, because if I ever lose my brother, I won’t have any reason to live. Do you understand? You’re all I have, man.'
'I love you too!' I sob, wrapping my arms around my sister. 'I’m sorry! I’m not going anywhere, Bruxinha. I’d never leave you alone. You’re my little sister.'
'What are you apologizing for? You’re a victim, Nate. Our parents fucked up our sanity. They’re both screwed up. And it’s not fair for you to apologize for having a disorder.' Bianca pulls back and gently wipes my tears. She gives me a sad smile, showing her small teeth, with a slight gap between the front ones. 'You know what I think about every night before bed? Do you know what goes through my mind when I’m suffering? That I was never alone. I always had you, and that’s a comfort. If our life is shit because we have a bastard for a father and a lunatic for a mother, at least we have each other. And that will never change.'
'You’re amazing!' I kiss her bangs. 'You’ll always be my Bruxinha! And I’d go to hell for you.'
'I’d go beyond it for you, kid!'"