69-Taco Baby

**Saviera's POV**

Jillian Mirabella-Rose Laurens is six pounds even, nineteen inches long, and was born at seven twenty-eight at night on October 26th. She is perfectly healthy and the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on. We are settled into our room that we'll be in for the next two days as our parents come in to visit first. Our parents and Daveed's siblings all come rushing into the room so they can see her. We decided we aren't letting her get passed around the room because it's flu and RSV season, so no one is holding her today. I'm grateful that everyone loves Jilly-Bean enough to respect our wishes to keep her healthy. My sister will be visiting on Halloween so that we have time to get settled in at home and she'll be able to bring Jax and Chandler. Bringing two wild boys into the hospital doesn't sound like the best idea to her and she knows how overwhelmed a mother feels after delivery. Everyone leaves at almost nine o'clock because that's when visitation hours end.
Zuri gets in bed with me and we cuddle Jilly-Bean together while Daveed is asleep on a pull-out couch. He did so good delivering our baby and it makes me excited for when Zuri has our precious boys. Her pregnancy has been pretty smooth since she stopped getting sick.
"She is so perfect. Let me hold her," I hand her to Zuri so that she can do skin to skin bonding with her other mommy. "New baby smell is the best smell in the world."
"I have been thinking the same thing all night. Daveed is over there knocked out like he was the one who just gave birth," Zuri and I try to laugh as quietly as we can so we don't wake him up. "In all seriousness though, you both were the bomb. Everything went exactly as I imagined."
"You did amazing, Sav. I always imagine women screaming and being mean to their spouse when they're in labor, but you were strong the entire time. This whole experience actually comforts me because now I know first hand that labor isn't always a horror like people try telling you. No one ever tells you about the good experiences while delivering a baby." Zuri gently plays with Jilly-Bean's hair as she sleeps soundlessly on her chest.
"I won't lie, it is painful. Did I feel like screaming? No, but I think I had it easy. Not to mention, my labor wasn't long at all. I hope yours goes as smooth as mine did." I don't want to lie and say delivery was easy, but when you have the right support and everything goes right, it sure makes it tolerable.
"I'm surprised you aren't sleeping. You can get some rest and I'll be on mommy duty tonight until she needs fed." Zuri offers.
"That sounds like a good idea. I love you and I'm forever grateful for the way you love me," We share a slow and gentle kiss before I turn on my side and fall asleep.
I wake up to the sound of Jilly-Bean crying and Zuri gets her from the little bassinett to bring her to me. She's ready for another feeding, but she isn't latching the way she is supposed to. The lactation consultant said feeding shouldn't be super painful, but this is terrible. I unlatch her and try again, but it still isn't right. I'm trying so hard to not get stressed out, but Jilly-Bean is hungry and she starts crying harder.
"Do you want me to get a nurse to help?" Zuri asked.
"Yes, please," I nearly beg. I'm on the verge of tears. I don't want her crying because of hunger. What if her tummy is hurting and I'm not able to help because I'm not doing it right?
A nurse comes in and she shows me how to use a nipple shield to make it easier since Jilly and I are so stressed out right now. She was able to latch, but I don't like using this. It feels like it's harder for her to feed with it and I don't like having that barrior there. I hope tomorrow we can get the latching issue figured out.

Morning comes and breastfeeding does not get easier. I still end up resorting to using the shield because I would rather swallow my pride and use it than to make her more upset. I'm so exhaused because she was up most of the night. Daveed and Zuri wake up with me, but they aren't able to feed her unless I start pumping. I'm home all the time, so I didn't think I would need to pump. Now that I think about it, I probably should. There will be times when one of them will want the bonding experience to feed her too and I know I will want to get sleep some nights.
"Sav, have you considered formula feeding? It would be a lot easier on you and Jilly." Daveed asked.
"I really don't want to do formula unless I absolutely have to. I understand why some moms use it, but I would like for our babies to be breastfed." I might be struggling right now, but Jilly-Bean and I will get this.
"Okay, babe. I know you can do it," He kisses my head and gives encouragement.

It's Halloween night and my sister is here with Jax and Chandler. They are incredibly excited to meet their little cousin and they're being so easy around her. We have Jilly-Bean dressed as a little taco with a lettuce hat and I have never seen anything more cute than this. It's getting kind of late, so Selene takes the boys home.
We're doing a little better with the breastfeeding, but we have our struggles sometimes. I've been told that once we get past this bump, it becomes much easier until your baby starts teething. I don't know if I want to breastfeed after she gets her teeth in because apparently babies bite pretty hard at that point. I guess I will cross that bridge when I get to it, but she will at least be fed breastmilk from what I pump.
Something I wasn't warned about was this healing process. The cramping is absolutely dreadful and I ran out of the little icepack pads that the hospital gives you for your lady bits. There are so many things that people warn you about, but this is the worst part of it all and I got no heads up. Of course the delivery was the most amazing experience, but the aftermath is killer. I know I should stop complaining because one day, I'll be wanting another baby and I'll have to willingly go through this all over again.
That's crazy. A mother being in excrusiating pain for days will go through this all over again if it means having another beautiful blessing in their arms.