Ginger Fox Part 2

I cross my arms, leaning against the car, watching the ferry while I wait for Baby and Jon, who are inside the grocery store. I take a deep breath, savoring the fresh sea breeze. It feels as if my skin is being gently caressed. Tilting my head to the side, I smile like a foolish teenager, just reminiscing about lying in that quiet room, resting on his firm chest, my cheeks pressed against his warm skin, those strong arms pulling me closer. God, I'm completely lost! I shake my head softly. Jonathan has captivated me in every possible way. My body, sore and marked by every touch of his, feels pleasant, safe, and protected, making me cling to him even more. My leg rested over his, like a clingy puppy that needs to be close to its owner.
What threw me off balance, after he dragged me out of the inn, trapped in his arms, growling between his teeth at the masked men, was arriving at the mansion and, before entering my room, already prepared to open the door to my quarters, seeing him standing beside me, looking at me with anguish, nervousness, as if he wanted to speak, but the words wouldn’t come out.
“What’s wrong?” I smile, embarrassed by the way he’s staring at me. I clutch his blazer, tapping my foot on the ground.
“I don’t want you to leave when the summer ends, little Nautilus.” My heart tightens in my chest. I can't hear this, not from his lips. It’s already enough what my heart tells me. “But I don’t want you to stay. I don’t want to trap you on this island by my side.”
God! I’d stay trapped with him anywhere, anytime, now and forever. I would give up everything just so I wouldn’t have to see my days without him.
“Come with me, Jonathan.” In a spontaneous act, driven by my heart, my fingers clutch his chest tenderly. “Come with me. Leave this island, free yourself from whatever is holding you here.”
“I’ll hurt you, Gim. My past demons, the ones I carry with me, they’ll hurt you so deeply that you won’t want me by your side.” I don’t need much to understand what his eyes are telling me.
The game is over. Those sad blue eyes are telling me that.
After caging my being and binding it to his, he’s letting me go. I feel like a caged bird, afraid to fly away from its cage.
“I’ll make sure you have a good amount to enjoy your life after the summer.” What is he talking about? I don’t even know if I’ll have a life when I board that ferry!
“I don’t understand. Do you think I agreed to all of this for money?” His hand holds my face as I feel tears burning me. Whatever happened in that room, everything we went through, it couldn’t have been just a game.
“It’s my gift. I want you to travel, to see other places, to live, to be happy, my little adventurous submarine.” I close my eyes, refusing to see what he’s asking of me. Jonathan wants me to forget him.
“Come with me, Roy?” My voice breaks as I cry, holding onto him as if he were my life. “End this sham of a marriage, I don’t want to be happy without you...”
“So brave, my sweet Gim, so mine.” Yes, I want to scream in that dark hallway that I belong to him, only him. I want to scream for him not to be cruel to me, pushing me away. What did I do wrong? What happened for him to make this decision? “There’s nothing for me outside this island, no new beginning, just emptiness, just like I am inside. At least now I’ll have you, I’ll have your smile that will fill every room in this mansion with your memories.”
“Jonathan, there’s always a new beginning. Start over with me.” I’m not ready to leave him, I’m not ready for the game to end. “Ask me, just ask me, and I’ll stay... I’ll stay, Roy. I’ll stay forever and we’ll start over together.”
His eyes close, silently killing me as he steps away, leaving a space between us. My fingers cling tighter, refusing to let him go. He wants me to venture out, to be happy, but I’m just a lost child in the world without him.
“I can’t ask that of you.” His broken voice whispers, keeping his eyes away from mine.
My fingers fall, as lost as I am, without support, without direction, without the lighthouse of my island. I’ve bound myself to Roy in every way possible, both in this plane and the others. I don’t know if I’ll continue to exist; I just know that my soul will search for his even after it’s detached from me. My arms wrap tightly around my body, and I feel like I’m in free fall. Only the harsh ground awaits me at the end of the fall. I didn’t prepare for the end, I just enjoyed and took everything he gave me. I became his and no longer mine, and it’s killing me. But I don’t fall, I don’t feel the injury from the impact, not when he pulls me in a swift motion, lifting me off the ground, showing me what his closed eyes are hiding. It’s fear, anguish... His turmoil leaves him at the mercy of what hurts him because he has no control over these emotions, which seem so new to him. Roy is asking me with his eyes what his throat is holding back, hurting him. I let my trembling arms wrap around his neck, pressing my forehead to his. Jonathan moves with determined steps towards my room door, letting my heart start beating with life again.
“It’s a good feeling, isn’t it?” I open my eyes, only to find the porcelain doll standing in front of me. Her dark lenses are on her face, and she clutches her bag tightly in her fingers as she breathes heavily.
“Excuse me, are you talking to me?” I look around, hoping Baby is on her way, but to my disappointment, she’s nowhere in sight.
“I think the only one with that lovestruck look in front of me is you.” She removes her sunglasses, allowing me to see the coldness in her pupils. “It’s a pity Mr. Roy can’t return the sentiment. It’s almost tragic.”
I push myself off the car, crossing my arms. I don’t understand what’s with this bitter woman. I turn my face toward the ferry, not wanting to let her see how uncomfortable her presence makes me.