Charlote Roy Part 2
I can still see his broken blue eyes staring at me with pain, from our last conversation at my house before I traveled with Boxtom. I carry the guilt within my soul to this day for letting him leave without a hug, without telling him how much I loved him. The alcohol burns as it slides down my throat, easing the remorse that always pushes me deeper into despair.
"You should have looked at Miss Fox, Baby." I let go of the glass, pulling the upholstered chair from the vanity to support my weary body and soul.
"Oh, stop, Aunt! I don’t need to look at Ginger to know she’s falling for Jonathan..."
"But you should have looked anyway; you would have seen the same thing I did." Baby falls silent, rubbing her hands together, cracking her fingers. "It’s Miss Fox’s emotional reflections that shine in his eyes. You tell me Jonathan is searching for her, but you’re mistaken. Roy is searching for what’s lost inside that closet. His feelings, which somehow that curious girl allows him to nurture through her."
"Roy is going back to that closet just to hurt himself again. The past was not meant to be relived..." Baby collapses onto the bed, keeping her face turned toward the window, following the night. "Jonathan seeks death. He has always pursued it like a devoted lover, and that’s all he wants, Aunt."
"No, Baby. Your brother is seeking to feel alive, and Miss Fox makes him feel that way..." My eyes shift, getting caught on the sad reflection in the mirror.
"I need you to listen to me, Chá." The tears keep flowing; I can’t stay strong. My fingers clutch the telephone, pressing my hand against the glass, seeing it both close and distant from me within the prison.
"Why don’t you tell the truth? God! Why don’t you tell him, Reimond?! Your children need you! Your business! Your legacy! Everything you’ve built is falling apart, and you still protect her." There’s nothing left in his gaze but a vast abyss. "They’re saying you were involved in a satanic cult, that’s why you killed her, but we both know the truth..."
"I can’t, and you can’t! Do you understand, Chá?! You can never tell anyone! It will make those newspaper rats dig where they shouldn’t, my children will be exposed!"
"Reimond, I can’t see you like this behind bars, doing nothing when I know the whole truth! The media portrays you as a cold monster, but the only heartless monster was her!" I slam my hand against the glass with hatred, with rancor. God! I should have pushed him away, should have tried harder to open his eyes. But Reimond was blinded, obstructed by the disease he called love, that he harbored for that monstrous woman.
"I can’t ask you to do that; I know I have no right, Charlotte. But you’re the only one I trust to take care of them..." He lowers his eyes, visibly having no desire left for anything. This is not my brother, not the intelligent man who came from nowhere and built his empire in the midst of oil.
"Reimond... please." I want to break the glass, want to hug him and tell him it wasn’t his fault, but I know he was already gone the moment he fired the bullet that killed her. He hated her as much as he loved her, and he knew he was destroying himself from within.
"I bought a mansion some time ago, in Norfolk. It’s a small island, but it will have security there, for you, Jonathan, and James. They will be protected, away from speculations." I wipe my face, listening to his low voice from the other side of the line. "Some things need to stay in the shadows, Chá. I’m not involved in a satanic cult, but I need to keep quiet to ensure the safety of the boys and their future."
"Are you talking about that place you were frequenting?" Reimond clenches his fist, looking serious at me, making me fall silent. His face turns to the distracted police officer at the door, then back to me.
"There are places you enter and can’t leave, so you will stay away from everyone. I’ve arranged everything. When the time comes, they will take care of his future..."
"Reimond, you will... You will get out of here. Just tell the truth in court. No jury in the world can condemn what you did, because any human with feeling would react the same way to the monstrosity done to Jonathan." He is angry. His heavy breathing grows louder, crushing his phone as he moves closer to the glass.
"You don’t understand, Charlotte! I can’t throw this shit in the fan without putting my children at risk! I won’t make that mistake again." My brother shakes his head, looking lost into nothingness. "I need you to do me a favor, Chá..." He won’t speak; his eyes confirm that. Reimond never told me what he’s truly involved in, only that powerful people are involved, and I know that’s what keeps him silent. Something bad is surrounding him. "The brown bear that’s in James’s crib, in my room, needs to be taken and hidden as if your life depended on it. Leave the rest to me. I’ll take care of you, Chá."
Reimond killed himself two days after I visited him, leaving a letter confessing to killing Sonja with a shot to the head, after killing the supposed lover, claiming they would never find his body. That night, I cried curled up in the corner of my room, holding the brown bear with glass eyes he asked me to retrieve from his house. I hadn’t had the courage to look; I knew I wouldn’t have the stomach for it, but when I received the call saying he had been found hanged in his cell, I opened the damn stuffed animal, found the tape hidden inside, and cried even more, horrified by the cruelty I saw on the video cassette.
My brother was not a monster. And even if no one else ever knows, I do. I am the only one who carries with me the face of the true monster in that room. I feel my body crumble along with my soul, amidst sobs of pain. I can’t believe the misfortune that has befallen my family or how everything ended, but I promised to take care of my nephews, and I would keep my word to my brother; I would protect them from everything I could.
And that’s what I did, every year that followed. The only thing I couldn’t do was protect Jonathan from himself. He is no longer my smiling, affectionate boy; he is just a hollow being with dead eyes, identical to the monster that attacked him. Jonathan came out of that closet, but his soul did not. It remained trapped with hers in the darkness.