Book 1: Chapter 24

I bolted up from bed, drenched in sweat. Taking deep gasping breaths, I tried to slow my heart rate back down. Swinging my legs over the edge off the bed, I put my head in my hands.

*'Just a dream, Silas. Nothing more.'*

*'It’s not a fucking dream, Eros. It’s the memory of them taking my sister. Of watching her get hauled off on the shoulder of some rogues.'*

I took a deep breath and shook my head. There was no way I was going back to sleep tonight. Getting up, I threw on a shirt and headed out of my room. The house was dark and quiet. Finally looking at the clock, it was 3 a.m. Heading out the back door, I shifted and took off into the forest. I needed to run some of this feeling off. Nate had dredged up memories I would rather forget and thus the nightmares plagued me.

Heading south, I ran and realized I was headed towards the pools that we used to go to as kids. They were off the territory but the three of us used to sneak off and go swimming during the summer. I passed the territory line and headed further down the stream. The pools were about a mile south. Sliding to a halt, my eyes widened as I saw a huge black wolf laying on the side of the pool.

Growling, I alerted them of my presence but they didn’t even raise their head or open their eyes. Sniffing the air, I didn’t smell anything. Slowly walking around, I saw the blue glow in the metal of it’s legs and I realized it was Solaris.

Shifting, I went down on my knees and touched her muzzle. “Solaris, you okay?”

There was no sound or movement and suddenly my heart started to beat faster. Leaning down, I put my ear and I heard the very slow heartbeat but it was much slower than I thought it should be.

“Solaris, come on. Wake up. Shift.”

I ran my hands over her fur and scratched her side and belly. She didn’t move or shift though. Cursing, I leaned down in the water and cupped some in my hands. Letting it fall on her head, I waited but still no movement.

“Fucking hell. Solaris, wake up.”

Dropping some of my Alpha command into the order, I finally got some movement. Her good eye opened up and landed on me.

“Solaris, shift. I can’t lug your giant ass back home.”

She rolled her big eye and closed it again.

“Oh no you don’t. Come on. Shift” I pushed more weight into the command and it had to be the first time I heard a wolf sigh out loud.

Finally though, I saw her shift her body slightly and slowly it started to take on a more human form. But I sat there, horrified, as the bones that cracked didn’t shift in the correct places at first and where the fur retracted, blood flowed out from the roots. I took hold of her good arm as it finally shifted into place so that she didn’t fall further into the water. Her lower body though was shifting so slow and disturbingly, I had to look away.

It looked excruciating and from the look on Solaris’ face, it was extremely painful. Her body basically collapsed back on the ground after the whole shift was done.

“Goddess, Solaris, why bother shifting if you have to go through that every time?”

She let out a breathy chuckle. “It gets worse every time.”

“Fuck. What are you doing all the out here?”

“I like the pools.”

Looking down at her face, her eyes were still closed and she was breathing slowly.  My hand came up and shifted some of the hair out of her face.

“Come on, let’s get you back to your mates.”

“No, Silas, wait. Just…”

She breathed out heavily and tried to sit up. Blushing, I looked up and away.

“Hold on.”

I got up and went over to the trees, grabbing some clothes I kept in there for when I went swimming in the pools. Pulling on some sweats, I grabbed a shirt and helped her into it. She sat up with her legs still in the water. Sitting next to her, I eyed her suspiciously.

“What do you want?”

She looked up at the sky. “Maggie said it shouldn’t be my choice.”

“Maggie, who the hell is…” My mind suddenly filled in the blank. Maggie was the name of Nate’s Aunt.

“Are you related to Nate?”

Solaris shook her head but as it came to stop, tears filled her eyes. For so long she had been so bad ass. A picturesque statue of fucking infuriating bad ass-ery. It was not great looking at this woman who was the First Alpha Prince break down.

“Silas…” Her voice was so far away.

I didn’t answer, I didn’t think she wanted me to. Her chest rose and fell until there was a point where she chuckled.

“Do you remember the crazy winter that blew through here years and years ago? Usually we would get maybe a foot of snow but we got close to four feet of it.”

My brow furrowed. She talked so familiarly about the area. Closing my eyes, I tried to remember back.

“I think I was eleven.”

She nodded. “We couldn’t get out of the door. It piled high in front of the house and we couldn’t get out. So Nate’s bright fucking idea was to dig a tunnel through the snow. To try to get to the playhouse we had out back.”

I smiled, remembering telling Nate and Aelia to wear jackets but they refused to because they didn’t want to dig the tunnel any bigger than it needed to be. The memory was so deep I felt myself falling into it. Seeing the wall of snow, smelling the fire in the fireplace and smoke.

My voice cracked at little. “We got pretty far too. But then the tunnel collapsed between us and the house.”

She laughed. “We got stuck for hours out there. Nate and I were stubborn and refused to take jackets and so we were huddled up like penguins.”

My eyes widened as I looked at Solaris, realizing what she was saying. This memory was only with the three of us. Me, Nate and Aelia were the only ones that knew. That and our father that picked us up like wet pups and threw us into the house. All three of us ended up with colds for a week.

“How do you…”

Her head tilted to mine. “How do you think I know, Sil? How do I know that you refused to kiss Jean in elementary school? She told her Dad and we had to have his whole family over for dinner and they made you apologize.” She snorted. “She was a slut even then.”

I started to shake, taking in the woman in front of me. This motorcycle riding, tattoo covered, part metal, bartender with two Beta’s that absolutely took her to bed. All the things that raced through my head that I knew about her, being a rogue, being an Alpha Prince. My mind rammed to a halt as Noah and Finn talked about her dying soon.

“Sil…”

Shaking my head, I stood up and put my hands on my head. I started to pace the length of the pool.

“Aelia is dead. Dad said…”

“He lied, Sil. He lied about a lot of fucking things.”

I growled at her. “He wouldn’t lie over this. He was distraught when she were taken. He lost a piece of himself, Solaris.”

Her eyes blazed with anger. “Because they weren’t supposed to take me, Sil! They were after Nate! Dad told them where we would be. The Hunters were threatening to attack the territory if he didn’t give up one of his kids. It was so easy for him to just choose Nate because he wasn’t blood related. I chose to get in the way. I couldn’t let them take Nate…”

There was pain at the end of her words.

“Dad wouldn’t have…”

“Wouldn’t have what, Sil? He lost himself when he lost Mom. He became cruel and uncaring. You didn’t see it because you were his golden boy. His next in line. He used to send kids to the Hunters from the orphanage, Sil. But the Hunters wanted more. They needed someone of Beta or Alpha blood so they threatened him. And instead of being a warrior and refusing, he was a coward. His cowardice cost him his daughter.”

“You don’t know what the fuck you are saying!”

“Oh no? How about the time you twisted your ankle while you and Nate were play fighting in the forest? Dad was furious and he made Nate stay outside for the night. But you and I tied our bedsheets together so that he could climb through the second window and sleep inside.”

I shook my head.

“Or how about the time when…”

“Just stop…please…”

She leaned forward, her hands dipping into the water. “I’ll stop when you believe me.”

“You died, Aelia.”

She laughed hollowly. “Oh, I died many times over the years. I tried to take my own life even more. First, I couldn’t live in that fucking place. I couldn’t keep living with what they were doing to me. Then, I couldn’t live with the fact that I now had to carry everything they had done to me with me every day of my life. How do you cope with what I went through? You don’t. So I tried to off myself…”

“Solaris, stop.”

“You know what Solaris is right? It’s Latin for sun. Instead of Ancient Roman.”

My nostrils flared and I slammed my first into a nearby tree. “Aelia is dead.”

She sighed. “You may be right. Your sweet, smiling, caring Aelia is gone. She died after she realized that no one was coming to rescue her. That she was on her own in a lab filled with Hunters. I remember her crying that day. I remember her losing hope as her heart shattered.“

“I can’t…I can’t even…” I turned, heading back the way I came. Back to my territory, back to my safety net.

“What does Eros say?”

I stopped and turned. “What did you say?”

“I said ‘what does Eros say?’ The crystal, it holds back my scent. But touch…touch doesn’t get blocked. It’s the reason why I’ve kept Nate at least ten feet away at all times. He would have felt…felt the bond. But you can feel the blood bond. When I first ruffled your hair on impulse, it was so fucking natural but Goddess be damned if I didn’t oust myself then. But Eros never said anything to you, did he?”

*'Eros?'*

*'She’s right, Silas. That’s Aelia. She’s our lost little one.'*

I coughed out sob and shook my head. *'She’s dead, Eros.'* “Aelia is dead!”

“Go, Sil. I can’t take you anymore.”

“I…”

She slammed her hand down on the ground and I watched it split open with the force she put into it. “Get out of here, Sil! Leave me the fuck alone!”

Turning on my heel, I shifted and raced back through the forest. The sun was just starting to peak up through the trees and any other day I might have enjoyed it’s beauty. Any other day I might have stood in the rays that filtered through the trees. Today though, today I wanted nothing but to disappear into the darkness.