Book 1: Chapter 28

I sat across from Silas in silence. The place he had chosen wasn’t fancy, but it wouldn’t be my usual go to. Luckily, I had the sense to forgo the ripped jeans and tank top but I still got looks with my leather jacket. It was nice, it just definitely wasn’t my scene but Silas fit right in. He was wearing slacks and a button up shirt. Not tie but he had cuff links for fucks sake. I’d never felt like the disappointment of a little sister before but here we were. 

We had ordered drinks, they came. We ordered our food and were waiting on it but he still hadn’t said a word to me. I wasn’t about to break the silence. Not after the yelling match we had in the forest and not after holding him back from killing our father. I knew who I was. The issue was that Silas didn’t.

Noah asked me about how much I would tell Silas and I told him that I would give Silas the truth but only if he asked. My life hadn’t been what his was. Sure, he had to watch his father get exiled and take over as Alpha but anyone sitting us side by side would say Silas had it easy. Hell, all my tattoos were to cover up scars that couldn’t heal and usually it worked. People drew their conclusions and looked away without really looking.

Our food arrived and the waiter looked nervously between us and I just shot him a quick smile. I guess he wasn’t used to his table not speaking either. Grabbing my fork and knife, I started to cut into the steak I ordered. It was perfectly cooked medium rare with just a little more on the rare side. If we were going fancy, I was going to get a good steak. Finn knew how to grill a mean steak but sometimes a good restaurant steak was where it was at.

Looking up, I noticed that not only had Silas not touched his food but he hadn’t touched his drink either.

“Sil, eat.”

His eyes met mine and he seemed a bit shocked for a moment. “No one calls me Sil. Not anymore.”

“Well, Silas just makes you sound like a stuffy Alpha.”

“Which I’m not.”

I smiled. “Oh no, you are. But not to me.”

His nose crinkled but he picked up his fork, eating the food slowly. I managed not not inhale my steak but I definitely inhaled the garlic mashed potatoes. The level of butter and cream would probably give a human a heart attack looking at the calorie count but they were incredibly fluffy.

The waiter came by, asking if we were good and I nodded. “My compliments to the chef for the mashed potatoes. I think if I was asked what meal I would want to have, it would just be a bed of the potatoes.”

Silas choked for a moment on what he was eating and I kicked him under the table. The waiter chuckled and nodded. He scurried off and I sat back in my seat. Grabbing my wine glass, I swirled it around before taking a sip. 

“Is there a reason you’re taking me to dinner? Or did you want to be seen with a hot biker chick to ward off all the she-wolves?”

“You were right.”

I laughed. “Of course I was right. When have I not been right?”

“Aelia.” Silas was looking at me seriously.

“Why would I lie to you, Sil? You’re the one in the bubble not me. I’ve been through…a lot. But it gives me a unique ability to gather information.”

He tapped his glass before take a sip. “Why…why didn’t you come back earlier? We could be a family…had time…couldn’t have…”

I sighed. “Sil, stop.” Grabbing my wineglass, I took a sip. “When I finally got out, I was in no condition to be anyone’s family. I was…not in a good place for a couple years. Even after that, I was…I wasn’t Aelia anymore. I was crueler…harder. It wasn’t until Noah and Finn started to get under my skin that I loosened up. It took years.”

“What happened?”

I sat back and the waiter came, clearing our plates.

“Any dessert this evening?”

Humming, I smiled. “I’m good. What about you?”

“I’m good. I’ll take the check.”

Once he left, Silas looked back at me. “You didn’t answer.”

“It’s not…not something I can just go into in a place like this.”

His eyes narrowed but he nodded. We quietly waited for the check. Once he paid, we stood and headed out of the restaurant. Silas didn’t stop as we exited and turned to walk down the street. I had to jog slightly to keep up with his pace but I watched his back as strode on the sidewalk. 

Some things really hadn’t changed. He would have the same posture, same stride while we were exploring the forests. I would be running behind him, watching him be the leader, as Nate followed behind me, making sure I didn’t trip or fall.

“Sil, what…?”

“Just follow.”

My mouth shut and I followed. I could just turn and go back to my bike. Noah and Finn were skeptical about letting me go out with him anyways. It took Silas a few days to reach out after what happened with our father. A shiver ran down my spine as I pictured our father, the condition he was in. He was left on his own all these years and that’s what became of him. A shell of deep seated hate, anger, lunacy, and probably loneliness. Not that I would ever vouch for the dick but I’m sure it had to be damning to lose everyone, especially your son. The one person he put so much time and effort into molding.

Silas stopped in front of a club after a couple blocks. He nodded to the two bouncers who moved for him automatically. Holding out his arm, he motioned me forward and I headed in first. It was only about eight or so in the evening but the place was already pretty busy with a line outside the door. The music was on point and I moved my head with it, a smile coming to my face. There was a vampire who was standing right before the whole club opened up. He and Silas shook hands.

“Keann, it’s good to see you.”

“You as well, Silas. What can I do for you tonight?” The vampire, Keann looked at me with an eyebrow raised.

Silas didn’t seem to catch his drift though. “Do you mind if I use the apartment above?”

Keann nodded and pulled out a key from his jacket pocket. “Just clean it up after you’re done.”

I giggled but didn’t say anything as Silas stared to walk down the hall ahead of us. There was a small stairs that went up to another hallway. It was quiet and he stopped in front of a door. Using the key, he opened it and held out the door for me. Walking in, it was not all what I was expecting.

The room itself was fairly large and very modern. It was clean and with the lights off, it was only illuminated by the lights outside and the neon sign that hung below the windows. It was high enough to see over quite a bit of the city and I took in the view as Silas turned on the three low lights of the kitchen.

“You want anything to drink?”

“If I’m going to recount this shit, I need something strong and hard. So whatever you got that fits that.”

He didn’t say anything as I heard him rummage around in the small little kitchen. I looked back over the view. Someone knew this view was lovely, putting the couch facing the windows. There was no TV but there were a few bookshelves scattered around the place that were full. Silas came up next to me with two bottles and two glasses. Setting them on the small table in front of the couch, he plopped down on the sofa.

“What is this place?”

“It’s where I come to meet people that I can’t necessarily have on my territory.”

I smirked. “So that’s everyone outside of your pack.”

“Not everyone. Charles comes up into the pack for things.”

Rolling my eyes, I shed my jacket and threw it on one of the chairs adjacent to the couch. Sitting down on the opposite side of the couch of Silas, I poured myself a double and him a single.

“Make it double too. I have a feeling I’m going to need it.”

“That’s probably true.”

Finishing pouring the drinks, I sat back and stared out the window. Sipping occasionally as I tried to get my thoughts in order. Maggie said I should do this but honestly I really hadn’t thought much past, ‘hey, it’s me Aelia’. There was a lot I didn’t want to touch with him, that I knew. Silas didn’t need to know some of the more gritty details of what had happened.

“Dad said that Nate was the one that was supposed to be taken. How did you know?”

I turned my head to look at him. His eyes were bright even in the dark. The magic in my eye could pick out every detail and see far better than I could normally but he stared at me with a sheer determination to get the facts.

“I didn’t know about anything until we started to get attacked. I remember them yelling ‘get the blonde one’ and ‘grab the blonde one’. At that point, it had been pretty obvious who they were going after. It also was obvious that they were specifically going after us if they knew exactly who to grab. So I did what I had to do. To keep you and Nate safe.”

Silas’ growl turned into more of a grumble. “We were there to protect you. We always protected you.”

“When the hell did you ever protect me, Silas?” My question and irritation seemed to catch him off guard because he sat up a bit. “You didn’t do shit. Not against Dad, or the other kids in the pack, or when shit went bad. Not once did you or Nate protect me. Walking around flanking me on either side is not protecting me if I still can trip and fall. You didn’t do shit. I protected the two of you time and time again. You were my responsibility.”

“That’s not…”

Huffing, I took a drink. “You can take those damn rose colored glasses off when looking at the past, Sil. When Mom died, our home turned into hell. I know that. Our upbringing wasn’t kind or rosy or anything anyone should be envious of. I’m sure it wasn’t much better after I got captured.”

“I’m not…”

“You are. While part of me is flattered that you look at it that way, because it means some of my faults might also be glossed over, it doesn’t change the fact. You are remembering what you want to…in the way you want to.”

He put the half sipped glass down, hard, on the table and started to refill it. “And of course you don’t.”

“I don’t have that luxury, Silas. I wish I could. I wish I could say I looked up to my father when he wasn’t beating Nate or I. When he forced me to break mates a part for his own gain. Watching others grow up normal, watching you and Nate go off to school while I was left back with him. If it wasn’t out of the frying pan, into the fire, I would have almost been happy to be taken away from it all.”

“Don’t say that. I know what Dad did. I’m not that ignorant. It turned worse as soon as you left. Worse and on the both of us. Though, Nate got the worse of it. Now, I guess I understand why. It was supposed to be him and I’m sure Dad blamed him for that.”

Finishing my drink, I poured another one from the bottle. Suddenly, this became much harder. I’d wish sometimes that I would have an older brother relationship back with him. There was some semblance of it with Maggie’s kids but it was different. Too different. Now though, Silas was a thirty-one year old Alpha who had grown up without me. And I without him. I’m not sure if we could ever have that kind of relationship back. There wouldn’t be enough time.

“So what happened, Solaris? After you were thrown on the back of that rogue. What happened to you?”