Book 1: Chapter 36

I stood at the stove. The potatoes I was frying up were turning a delicious golden brown as I flipped the cubed pieces around. We were opening a little late today and it gave us the rare opportunity to eat together. Since, it was my turn to cook, I decided on a simple Cubano sandwich with potatoes. Solaris had made horchata earlier so that would be added as well. The plates were already set out on the bar counter and I was finishing up then potatoes before doing a final assembly of the sandwiches.

Finn was sitting on the bed, leaning back, talking to Solaris about our next trip to the castle. We’d been requested to attend a meeting there and possibly end up heading out of a mission if that was the reason for the summons. The Alpha King didn’t give Solaris much but apparently it was important enough that all the Alpha Prince’s needed to show up.

“Maybe it’s going to be an all out battle against them?”

Solaris hummed, standing between Finn and the kitchen counter. “I’d finally take out those two dumbasses. The old man knows that. So I doubt it’s that. Honestly. I’d kill the next two up too. Leave Arden and June to duke it out over the title.”

“Your old man still insisting you choose?”

She huffed this time. “I don’t know what he expects me to do. I don’t mind giving my opinion on the guys but choosing? He’s the damn Alpha King. Let him do his job.”

I chuckled. “Sol, he would have passed it onto you long ago. If he could.”

“Yeah well, I’m not happy about any of it.”

“Love, he trusts you. He trusted you with out kind, and still does.” Finn smiled at her.

Her face scrunched up and I laughed. “Don’t make that face. You know how much our kind, outside of the individual packs you’ve helped, look to you as their second king. If the Alpha King even just said that they were approved by you, many packs would look at the new Alpha King with respect. Because of you. Embrace it.”

“Embrace my ego? Let it expand my head further?”

Solaris started to laugh. The laugh though turned into a cough and at first, it was just that. Both Finn and I froze when Solaris reached out, grasping Finn’s shoulder tightly. She clutched her stomach as she doubled over until suddenly she spewed blood over the floor.

“Sol!” 

Finn was up in a second as she struggled against the coughing. She had her hand over her mouth but you could see the blood streaming through her fingers. The moment she gripped Finn’s arm to hold her self up, blood would spray onto the floor, the bed, and Finn. I was frozen. My body wouldn’t move. My mind blank. Fear gripped me, every ounce of me. It held tight as the grip on the cast iron pan tightened.

“Sol! Come on, sweetheart. Breathe!”

I realized as Finn shouted, she wasn’t able to inhale. Caught within the cycle coughing that she couldn’t take a proper breath. There was too much liquid, too much blood, coming up for her to be able to breathe properly. Coming around the kitchen bar after setting the pan down lightly, my hands were shaking but I slowly bent down in front of her, getting sprayed with her blood. The blood of my Alpha. My lover. My best friend. I could feel it on my face, on my arms, every drop. 

“Calm, love. We got you.”

I wish I believed my own words. That the strength that came out was something a felt. Not the crumbling that I was really feeling. The numbness started to come in, seep as my heart shut down. Clamping down on any emotion that was trying to bubble up. My hands stopped shaking but my heart still raced.

“Noah! What…?” Finn’s voice sounded like he was yelling under water. The pounding of my own heart drowned it all out. 

My fingers made their way into her mouth, and down the back of her tongue. It was hard, but finally through her coughing, I was able to get to her gag reflex. Solaris leaned over and threw up. Red poured from her mouth but she took a gasping breath. My hand shook as I cupped her face. It was completely covered in red, leaving a print under my touch.

“That’s it. Breathe. Slowly.”

She took a couple gasping breaths before finally sucking in more substantial and slower breaths. Her body sagged and Finn held her up. He had tears streaming down his face, emotions etched in ever facet of his body.

“Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.” Finn pulled her up and clutched her to his chest.

My hand slipped from her cheek and I watched helplessly as Finn carried her to the bathroom. The sounds of the water running made me peel my eyes away from the now slightly closed door. Looking down, hands covered in red, my mind lost all sense. Auto-pilot engaged somewhere and I got up, walking over to the kitchen sink. Using the dish soap, I scrubbed. I wasn’t clean. The floor wasn’t clean. The bed wasn’t clean. It all needed to be cleaned up.

By the time I was done, the skin on my hands and arms were pink. I also scrubbed my face and neck, getting any residual spray off. Turning, I grabbed towels and a cleaning bottle. The floor needed to be cleaned next. Three towels were needed just for the floor. Next was the comforter. Red dots littering the dark green fabric. Stripping the bed, I tossed the blankets and top layers into a pile with the now dirty towels. Another towel was needed for the bed frame. My eyes focused, scrubbed away what didn’t belong. Once there was nothing but the wood, I picked up the laundry and headed down stairs.

The laundry closet was next to the door that headed down into our gym. It was an laundromat sized washer and dryer, since we did sometimes have table clothes, napkins, and the drapes from the bar but it helped being able to wash huge loads of normal laundry as well. Shoving the towels and bedding into the washer, I started to strip down as well. My shirt, covered in red. My pants, covered in red. They all needed to go. Once shoved in, I turned on the washer after filling it with soap. Watching the water fill for a minute, I stared at it. My mind still completely blank. Only feeling the slight chill down here in boxers. 

Walking up the steps back to our living space, I narrowed my eyes at the food I was almost finished making. Turning off the burner, I set the pan aside with now the way too crispy potatoes. Slowly and methodically putting away each of the fixings for the sandwiches. What was I going to do with this? No one was going to eat it, were they? Did I just make food for no one? I stared at the inside of the fridge. What just happened?

“Noah?”

My eyes snapped to the bathroom and I walked over, pushing the slightly ajar door open. Finn was sitting on the edge of the tub, his button up shirt and pants riddled with red. My fingers itched to take them and throw them in the laundry. They were dirty. They needed to be washed. I needed to clean them. If I hurried. I could get them in with this cycle.

Finn interrupted my thoughts. “Noah, my mate, come back to me.”

My eyes slowly lifted from his dirty shirt to meet his eyes. “Dirty laundry…” It was all I could say. Swallowing, I saw the pile of red riddled clothes on the floor next to him. The wet towel hanging on the side of the tub. I started forward towards the pile.

“Noah. Stop.”

Eyes snapping back to Finn, he was on the verge of a breakdown. Following his gaze as his head turned, our Alpha was in the tub. The water was warm and steam was barely coming off of the top in wisps. Her eyes were closed, body clean of any red, leaning her head back against the tile. She was breathing, slowly and methodically. Meaning, she had to have fallen asleep.

“I need you to take her out, dry her off, and put her into bed.” Finn looked back at me.

My brow furrowed. “I’ll…take the laundry. You can…I’ll…”

“Noah. I cleaned her off. I need you to take care of her. She needs you.”

Shaking my head, I stepped back out of the bathroom. Swallowing hard, my minds auto-pilot was failing.

“I…I’ll clean up. I’ll open. You stay with her. Make sure…”

“Stop, Noah! I need you to do this! For me. I’ll take care of the rest. You need to stay with her.”

My hands curled up into fists. Why was he forcing me? Why was he doing this? I was the Alpha between us. I was the one who took care of everything. What he was asking was for me to break. I’d break. He knew that but his eyes were still hard as they captured me. Pinning me in place where I was as I tried to back away.

Finn got up from the side of the tub. His hand coming out of the water. My eyes flittered to Solaris. She was starting to slip further into the tub. His hand had been holding her up in her sleep but now he was picking up the clothes off the floor and towels. She was going to slip under. Reaching out, desperately, my hand caught her arm and I gently held her in place so she didn’t slip down anymore. The water was now just under her chin.

“Finn!”

He didn’t say anything as he walked out of the bathroom. My eyes trailing the empty space he left in the doorway. Looking back at Solaris, she was still sleeping peacefully. The towel was laying on the sink counter and I tried to think the best way to do this. It wouldn’t do her any good to stay till the water got cold. She needed rest and to be in bed. Reaching up, my thumb brushed against her red lips. I felt the numbness starting to crack and I took a deep breath. Getting an arm under her knees and snaking the hand I was holding her up with behind her back, I adjusted myself for the lift. Gently grabbing her side, I lifted her up out of the water.

Placing her onto the sink counter, on top of the soft towel, I managed to wrap the towel around her. Even to where I could lean her against my body, using the free towel to dry her off. Solaris still had her usually short hair, though it had grown out a bit. I could barely reach her head with the towel I had, so I grabbed my that was in reaching distance. Drying her off, slowly, gently. Under her breasts, her stomach, between her thighs, her legs and feet, back, neck, lastly her face. Halfway through wiping, a glass broke down stairs and I closed my eyes. For a moment I stood still, listening to the angry cries from my mate. Him self-destructing, away from everyone. 

My heart couldn’t handle my emotions, let alone his. My eyes opened and I went back to my task. Softly I brushed her lips, her cheeks, her eyes, taking the water droplets away. Picking her up again, I walked us into the bedroom and laid Solaris out on the bed. Going into the closet, I pulled out some underwear and two of my shirts.  One I pulled on, the other I lifted Solaris up and pulled it over her head. As expected, it pooled at her butt where I was holding her up. Next, I slipped on her underwear. Pulling back the sheets, I slipped Solaris into the bed. Another trip to the closet and I took out our spare comforter and laid it across the bed.

Finn walked up the stairs, only in boxers, and headed into the closet. He came out in another button-up shirt and pants.

“Finn, she needs you. I can do…”

“Take care of her. I’m opening the bar.” He closed the door to the stairs behind him.