Chapter 40

Euniel
My father asks me to take a seat in the chair. His face is not friendly at all. He doesn't even offer to keep my suitcase in the room, or even offer me something to drink. For a father who has spent more than ten years without seeing his only son, it's still curious that he behaves like this when he sees me. There is no doubt that my presence does not help him. I can read in his eyes an ardent desire to ask me what I'm doing here. However, he tries to control himself so as not to appear indelicate. Anyway, what else could surprise me about this man? I have seen black and white with him in the past. No matter he can do or say, it does not change anything concerning the idea I have on him. However, I do not blame him for his attitude. He looks at me oddly, then he sits down on the chair next to me. His eyes on me don't take off at all.
"Hello dad, how are you?" I tell him, breaking the heavy silence that reigned in the room.
"I'm fine thank you, what are you looking for here?" He ended up asking me the question that was nagging him, almost in an aggressive tone.
"What question?! You are my father after all, do I have to give you a reason before I come to see you?" I question him.
"I did not say that you should first have a reason before coming to my house. However, I believe that you could have informed me before making the trip, and especially that you were coming very early on the morning. I could've prepared to welcome you better." He responds by looking for bogus excuses.
"So you will never cease to amaze me dad! It's been ten years since you my father, you haven't seen your son, but all you care about is asking why I haven't warned you before I left or Why did I come in the morning? Is this the reaction of a father towards his only son? Unless you are not my biological father?! Because your reaction to my coming can only mean such a thing."
I drop that last phrase on purpose, trying to see his reaction. I am a psychologist and therefore I can psychoanalyze people easily in order to see, from their reaction, if they are lying or hiding something from me. My father's reaction will give me a big lead on the truth. After hearing my last sentence, my father gets nervous all of a sudden. He starts to look around the room, avoiding my eyes. Then he replies looking nervous
"What a question my boy!Of course I'm your father Euniel, where do you get such weird ideas?"
"Ah yes? That's not the impression you give me though. Since my childhood, you have always behaved towards me as if I were not your son, despite my efforts to catch a bit attention from you. And your attitude this morning further consolidates this doubt. I don't know what a father and son relationship looks like, but ours is everything except that." I reply, keeping my gaze on him. I can see that he is more and more uncomfortable.
"But what are you talking about my boy? I see that you are not well in your head there. Did you fall on your head on your way while coming here? Or maybe you need to drink something to recover you spirit! I have beer in my fridge, do you want me to serve it to you? We We'll continue this discussion later." He responds by getting up with a nervous gesture. As for me, I keep my composure and always scrutinize him. I look at him so much on purpose, because the effect of my gaze is to bring out his feelings and his emotions on his face. In a calm voice like since the beginning of this conversation, I answer him
"No thank you! I believe that if you really wanted to offer me a drink, you would do it when I arrived here and not while trying to escape from this chat. To believe that you are hiding something from me."
"I'm not trying to escape or hide anything from you. Are you here to visit me or do you have other ulterior motives?" My father says aggressively.
"Did I already tell you the reason for my presence in your house, or are there other things I should know that you haven't told me?" I retort calmly.
"Of course not! What other reason should there be? Stop talking nonsense boy! I don't know what's on your mind or what nonsense you've been put in your mind, But surely you must be making up your mind. You've been years without setting foot in my house, and then you show up in the middle of the morning?! It's normal that I'm a little intrigued by your arrival. That's why I'm telling you I asked all these questions, it's nothing like you imagine. Never mind, I'm still your father, and always have been. If you felt like I was harsh towards you when you were still a child, know that it was just because I felt bad and you were the perfect target to vent on." He answers me by wanting to look for pretexts. My eyes still on him, I ask him
"You felt bad? And why so? What was my role in the pain you felt? Was it my fault that my mother had left the house? Or did I have something to do with it?"
"No, you probably had nothing to do with it. However, the fact that your mother left her home to go on an adventure traumatized me a lot. Therefore, you were an easy target for me to pour my anger. I kind of wanted to make you pay for all the harm his leaving had done to my life. I was basically mad at you because of your mother."
My father succeeds in digging the abscess by evoking this painful period of our life. Unwittingly, I feel strong emotions rising within me despite the enormous efforts I make to contain them. My anger becomes strong and resurfaces. I see like a movie all my childhood, my father's indifference towards me, as well as his empty gaze on me. This memory is still fresh in my memory and hurts me so much. It is often said that time heals the wounds of the heart, but this is not true. It is just a bandage and at any time the wound can bleed if the bandage is removed. Just see the example with me right now. Seeing this execrable man again making me shed tears almost every night because of his indifference towards me, pisses me off. So I take the floor and despite my efforts to calm down, I find myself raising my voice at him.
"Make me pay you say? So you weren't ashamed? What kind of person are you? Or were you a monster, or rather a coward because that's the right term to describe you, to persist About an innocent little boy who asked nothing more than to live peacefully with his father and be loved by him? What kind of man does that? What had I to do with my mother leaving? "
"I recognize that I was wrong all along for behaving so badly with you. Believe me, I understood it, but a little later, that you were not your mother and you shouldn't have to pay for his mistakes. You didn't deserve the way I was acting towards you at all..."
"If at least you acted even a little bit, it would have been bearable. The real problem is that you didn't act at all. You were like a ghost father to me. I didn't exist not in your eyes. And that for a child is worse than inflicting bodily harm." I interrupt him, speaking with bitterness in my heart. This man had hurt me so much. I think spitting this in his face right now allows me to free myself from this lump that has been stuck in my throat for years. He looks at me in amazement. He surely doesn't understand how I react like that. I've always been a talker. I had always taken everything without deigning to open my mouth. But that era is over. I need to free myself from this prison of my past, in order to move forward.
"I'm sorry my boy, forgive me for all the harm I've done to you! I acted like a jerk, forgetting that you were only a child and that, more than me, the departure of your mother had more damage. I was so blinded by my pain that I had not even seen yours. Believe me, I was hurt myself, but that should not clear me of my mistakes. "
My father takes the pain of my mother's departure to justify his behavior towards me during childhood. Surely he doesn't suspect that I know the truth. What amazes me so much and makes me lose my way is the ability he has to play his role so perfectly. We would easily believe it. After about a minute during which there was a rather telling silence, I decided to question him, with an icy tone,
"Why ?"
"Why what?" He replies looking lost. I resume with the same cold tone
"Why did you let me live with you knowing everything?"
"But come on boy, what a question?! Where was I supposed to let you live? Even though your mother abandoned us, you are still my son after all. Even if I was a jerk to you, that doesn't take away ke the fact that you are my son and that I loved you. I couldn't let you go anywhere else. Besides, what do you mean by knowing the truth?" He lies shamelessly.
"Well, I'm obviously talking about the truth that I'm not your son. The one you know very well." I answer him calmly. My gaze is very intense on him.
My father, like any reaction, nearly toppled over from his chair despite how comfortable he was sitting. He begins to run cold sweats on his forehead. If I wasn't in the same room as him, I would have thought it was hot, whereas the temperature is very mild this morning. Like any answer, he starts to say anything
"But what are you talking about my boy? You must surely be delirious. What are you going to invent again this morning? Did you come here to invent bullshit?"
"I'm not making this up and it's not bullshit, and you know that perfectly well. I'm going to ask you the same question again, why did you keep me in your house when you knew I wasn't not your son? Who was forcing you to do it? Because you never loved me and it was obvious that you were acting under duress in keeping me. If it was up to you, you were going to leave me in an orphanage or even in the street without having any remorse. However, what I would like to know now is who made you keep me at your house, and for what purpose?
"I believe that your studies in psychology go to your head a lot, to the point of giving you the most overflowing imagination. You are always welcome at my house, however, if you come to talk nonsense, I will not tolerate such a thing . I have already apologized to you. For the rest, I cannot accept it." My father, or should I say Charles, shamelessly tells me. I stare at him in silence and come to feel disgust for him. What kind of man is he? I wake up with a lighter heart and give him a hard look
"I don't think I owe you anything anymore. Between you and me, there is nothing more. I know everything, DNA test to support that you are no longer my father. And believe me, I will go looking for my mother and I will find her, even if I have to fight the whole earth. As for me, don't try to contact me anymore."
He challenges me with his gaze, and finally declares
"You don't know what you're up against. You've become a balanced man today and you can build yourself a happy family. If I were you, I wouldn't venture into this terrain, because believe me, it's very slippery."
"You finally decide to have balls, it's already a good point for you. However, you can keep your advice to yourself. Anyway, I never asked your opinion to make a decision and you never meant Nobody to me." I conclude then I take the direction of the exit door. I'm so happy with myself for what just happened. My father had just confessed to me in half words that my mother was being held captive and that he knew these people behind her captivity. Now the race to find my mother is on and I don't intend to rest until I find her.
pen
I was already on the point of leaving this town and by extension my job, since the reason for my development here seemed not to exist. I had even already written my letter of resignation, but I learned information that called everything into question this decision. Indeed, Mr. Hawam in one of our conversations mentioned to me his daughter called Muse who returned from the trip a short time ago. I immediately understood who it was. Indeed, it is an impossible coincidence that it is another Muse than the one I am looking for. So I decided to stay to carry out my mission. But it's already been more than three weeks since I've seen Mr. Hawam. I learned at work that he is sick and is now at home. I could have gone to his house to visit him. However, with the presence of that plague Muse in his house, it would cause a scandal and my plan would fall through immediately, as I must not jeopardize my cover. So I have to wait patiently for Mr. Hawam to get back to work to see him. I'm going to apologize to him in his office for not going to visit him during his period of illness, on the pretext that I had a lot to do at work.
For a week already, there is a young woman who has been hired in the company. She is very beautiful and very hot. As the good predator that I am, I don't hesitate to make eyes at him. Already that I have been made easier by putting it under my service, which is that of marketing, things will go quickly. I believe that she is not indifferent to my charm. His shy smile and his way of checking me out when my gaze is elsewhere, made me realize that I had an effect on him. So I decide to go on the attack to seduce her more. Her first week working here, I invited her to the restaurant where I behaved elegantly towards her. I do everything to make his heart fall. On the last working day of the week, while we were having a meal during the lunch break, I said to him
"You are a very interesting girl. Since I have been working in this company, never has a girl been so successful in capturing my attention." Of course, I told him canards. My sole purpose is to put her in my bed.
"Ah yes? And how many girls have you told this to before me?" She questions me, looking at me with soft eyes.
"You're the only one I tell of course! Why think I'm lying to you?"
"Maybe because you're a hot, hot guy and a middle-aged grown man, and I'd be surprised if you were still a heart to take." She replies without putting an end to her game of seduction.
"I swear to you, however, that I am a free man like the wind. It has been years since I decided not to put myself in a relationship with anyone anymore." I lie to him without scruple.
"Ah yes? And why so?" She asks me doubling attention.
"Maybe because the maid hasn't shown up yet?! Or maybe I was deeply bruised in love. I loved a girl with all my heart years ago in the past, but she didn't hesitate to spit on my heart by tearing it into a thousand pieces. Since this heartache, I had sworn to myself that I would no longer trust a woman to the point of putting myself in a relationship with her."
I invent a story for him that has nothing to do with me. Girls love guys who jerk off heartbreak stories and they fall into their trap like a fly in the soup. Works every time. I know she'll fall for it too. And as I had imagined, Audrey's face becomes sympathetic and friendly. She tells me
"I'm very sorry for such a painful past! I hope with all my heart that you can find a woman who will wipe the tears from your eyes and make you love again!"
"Thank you so much for your concern. Who knows, maybe it's you that woman?! As soon as I laid my first sight on you, I knew you were a good woman. All the barriers I built around my heart have all fallen." I add my spiel to knock her out once. She smiled happily hearing that.
"Wow, how flattering is that?!" She exclaims.
"No Audrey, I'm not flattering you at all. You only have to see you to know that you're a queen. Would you do me the honor of accepting a date this weekend?"
"Like this weekend starting tomorrow?" She hastens to question me.
"Yes, or is it early for a date?"
"No, not at all! That would make me rather happy!" She hastens once again to answer.
"Alright then, in that case it works."
I conclude with a charming smile.