Reality in the Face

Emily watched as her mother kept sobbing into her hands and all she could do was just look at her as she cried and wish that there was something she could do for her.
Emily knew how hard losing their father had been for her mother but she had never seen her cry even once. It was hard watching that strong woman break down now was a little nerve-wracking. She rose from her bed and walked to the balcony opening the door before walking outside.
She followed her outside watching her watch the place

" You knew he was gone" she murmured, she wasn't sure what answer she was hoping to hear or if she would even like it. But maybe asking would be a way of getting it off her chest. Her mother said nothing, just watched the trees and the sun that was setting in the corner.

" Why did you never tell me about Dad" she asked softly¨C again, finally voicing what had been on her mind for so long.
It was a question she had wanted to ask ever since reading his diary entries a few days back
She stood there frozen, just staring at the space in front of her, then she turned her eyes wide with what I could only describe as fear or was it sadness? What was she afraid of?

" Mom" Emily whispered, she turned away from her facing the open forest, she blinked rapidly her hands fluttering over the bar and then coming to fall on it gripping it tightly.

She swallowed tensely as she sighed

" I need you to know I did what I thought was best at the time" she muttered, Emily reached for her hand grasping it tightly in hers, no matter what happened she would always love her mother, nothing could change that.

She was wrong if she thought she or Sam would hate her, she had been there for us our whole lives and had raised us to be good people so we didn't feel the absence of our father so that the loss would not be like an insurmountable obstacle.

" I met your father when I was twenty. I was young and full of ideals but I was hopeful that I could find love as well" she whispered, tugging her jacket around her. She walked to the chair and sat down patting the remaining space out for me to sit by her.
" When he tried to get me to marry him, I was flustered but I was happy. My relationships had never been very stable but he was a good man and he made me happy. I said yes."
" Things were normal until you and Sam were born. Then some things would happen that I couldn't explain, flecks in your eyes and growling noises. Your father always seemed to be calm" she sniffled taking her hand into her laps
" Then he explained to me, what was happening and I felt so angry about it all. I wanted to leave him but where would I go? He was the love of my life and it felt like betrayal. So I stayed and prayed that you would be submissive like he was" Emily winced, she didn't want to be submissive or whatever her mother considered to be normal, she wanted to be a werewolf and her mother seemed to consider that to be abnormal and she didn't know what to think about that.

" Then the letter came at midnight, your father said he had to go somewhere. I begged him to stay and told him I'd go with him. He said no and begged me to stay put with you and your brother for a while. That he would be back" She began looking at the almost dark clouds half-heartedly
" He did not explain much but I was willing to do what it took, he was my best friend before we married and he left his pack. I would have done everything for him"

" What happened'' she asked the longer the silence dragged out like she was unsure what to say or how to continue

" he was supposed to come the next day, but he didn't, I was worried so I decided that I would look for him, but you were too little so I dropped you off at my friend's place just in case"

" The next night he still wasn't back all I heard was the tales of the killings that were carried in all the cities we had, and it was impossible to control the wagging tongues that had been eager to spread the news," she pulled her hand out of hers running them through her hair, Emily could remember the event of those days a little. When everything had been the government's fault.

She wondered how many of those deaths had been from what happened that night, she wondered if it had been the ghouls too.
Even now the sounds from the attack earlier and the blood that was spilled as the ghoul had bitten into the body of that man making him cry out in pain and the blood-stained face of the ghoul before he had been ripped off her.

Finn had something to do with this, she knew he did.

" I searched everywhere for him, I looked everywhere I could think of but nothing. And he hadn't been with his pack for a while so I couldn't reach them since I was human "

" The longer you took to transform the more I worried less for you that anything that had taken your father would take you too."

" I lived with the fact that he wouldn't come back and I made do. I was grateful you were with me" she murmured
" I just wanted you to be normal" she whispered and Emily sighed– what did normal mean in this case why was she so interested in me being normal?

" But I wasn't normal" she whispered and her mother sighed

" Maybe that was my fault but I did what I thought was best you weren't even werewolves and you needed to be safe " she huffed and she nodded

" I know " Emily replied softly no matter how she had done it Emily did believe her mother wanted the best for her.

She gripped her hand in hers and kissed them

" I love you, mom"
" But maybe it's my turn to do what I think is best" she finished

She pulled her into a close hug

" Thank you, Mom, for everything," she said softly and her mother nodded.
She looked pale and tired her face was almost white, she needed to eat but Emily knew that it would not be easy to get her to do that so she lifted her by her arm.
" Come with me, let's get you into bed" she mumbled and her mother nodded dragging herself to her feet to follow her. They walked back into the room and she put her into bed tugging the bedspread over her.
" Sleep a little. It will be good for you" She nodded her assent.
" Don't let your brother in and don't tell him anything. He'll worry for no reason" she muttered and Emily nodded
" I won't" Once she heard the even breathing she rose from the bed and

She walked away leaving her there, Sam was at the door looking worried so he shook her head at him
" She's asleep let her be " she murmured and he sighed nodding
" Are you ok?" he asked and she grinned nodding. She was not really but she had to go do this on her own, she had to find a way to get what she needed to become more skilled at fighting at the very least because this problem wasn't going away any time soon. She had to find a way to contribute to stopping this Finn from hurting anyone ever again.
She walked back to her room and then changed her mind she needed to find Logan and she also needed to stop fangirling over him. They were on the cusp of the end of the world. She found him in the training yard, he was shirtless practicing which made his muscles bunch beneath his shirt and made her almost swallow her tongue.
She shook her head when he grunted, she needed to stop fangirling over him right now.
She caught glimpses of a small book that she hadn't seen before a green-covered book,
maybe it was another dictionary for the symbols they had found recently. She bent over it and looked at the title

El braïn Caûsus.
She frowned at the reaching to pick up the book, Logan grunted rolling down to the floor his opponent pinning him down, He still watched them as he just lay there as if complacent before he pushed the man off of him and moved to hit him.
She sighed at his victory and stiffened when he looked her way, she dodged into the nearest wall grasping her chest as she escaped swiftly, and she found herself down a corridor of some sort trying to be desperately quiet.
She heard steps of feet behind her and then they paused. She stood there still in hiding against the wall clutching the book to her chest.
" Oh get out of the wall " a voice grumbled and she froze that was Logan, her face turned beet red like an embarrassing cherry cake. This whole moment was embarrassing.

" Aren't you supposed to be in bed?" he asked and she pried herself out of the wall, she laughed

" I was in bed, but then I couldn't sleep and so I decided to walk" she drawled and he scoffed
"Uh-huh. That's why you're with that book" he asked and she glanced down and winced realizing she was with a book
" You shouldn't be touching people's things " he whispered and she scoffed
" It's not like your name was written on it " she mumbled and he sighed stretching out his hand. She dropped it in his palm reluctantly and he nodded turning away from her. She grabbed the waistband of his shorts
" I want you to teach me"