Chapter 17 - Dark Past

*****Maddison's POV******

"Go have a quick shower and then we can talk." Coda says, exiting the bathroom with nothing but a towel hung loosely around his hips.

Woah.

I swear I actually drooled at his abs for a minute... and those tattoos... wow!

He smirked when seeing my reaction to him, before I blushed deeply at being caught staring...

I stood up and plodded my way past him and into the bathroom, closing the door behind me to see that he had left me a fresh towel and a change of clothes on the counter.

After we sat at the river for a while, we rolled around wrestling in the dirt some more and chased each other around, before heading back here.

I showered quickly, growing anxious to get back to him to have our talk since the reality of what had happened earlier was beginning to sink in...

I had a nightmare...

Then he got angry and strangled me...

I tried to leave...

Some guy tried to attack me...

I had so many unanswered questions.

I turn off the dial in the shower before hopping out to brush my teeth and change.

I throw my hair up into a messy bun on top of my head, before leaving the bathroom to see him sitting patiently on the bed waiting for me.

"Uh hey..." I state, causing him to turn to look at me.

"Hey." He replies briefly, looking rather... nervous?

I was growing more anxious about this whole discussion because I didn't know what to expect at all...

"Sit with me." He says, gesturing to the bed, bringing me back to earth as I notice I had just been standing there like a creep the whole time.

I move to sit by him, getting myself comfy as he fixes his position so that he's now facing me...

"I don't even know where to start." He huffs out sadly, avoiding eye contact with me.

This was so weird seeing him this nervous...

"Well why don't we start with why you strangled me earlier? What the hell even happened? I was having a really horrible dream and when I woke up my first instinct must have been to be close to you... but why did you react like that?" I question warily, watching him as he fidgets with his hands.

"Will you believe me if I just tell you the whole truth..." He sighs quietly, causing my heart to crack at his demeanour.

"Of course I will, take it away I won't judge you." I state confidently, figuring that this must be really important for him to get off his chest.

"No but... I'm scared that when I tell you, you won't want to be my mate anymore..." He replies slowly, as if wanting me to understand how serious this is.

"Like I said... I won't judge you, I'll be here to help you with whatever it is and I swear I won't hate you." I encourage him, and he eventually looks up into my eyes to see if I truly mean my words or not.

"Okay..." He breathes shakily.

"Take your time." Is all I say, causing him to gulp.

"Okay so... I'll start from the beginning..." He states, causing me to perk up slightly as he clears his throat.

"I came here years ago... shit... no in fact that's bullshit... more like I was coached into coming here years ago..." He states, getting angry with himself slightly for his wording.

"You were coached into coming here?" I repeat, as he nods his head.

"It started when she came to my pack when I was only nine years old... my Mother had just split up with my Father due to him being an abusive dick and our pack was basically crumbling in general at the seams. I moved in to a separate house with my Mom, still in the same pack, but I didn't understand any of what was going on since I was just a kid and I would just go to school and then back home to my Mom as normal.... until one day when I came out of school and found that nobody was there to pick me up... I waited for over an hour for my Mom and she never showed so I walked home, although it took me fifty minutes and I was only nine, I walked all the way back and when I eventually got there, I found my Dad beating the shit out of my Mom." He stops for a breath, as his eyes glazed over with tears.

Woah.

He blinks back the tears before he continues-

"I was horrified when I saw him and I remember when he caught me standing by the door and nonetheless continued to yell at me to watch him beat the shit out of her because he said she deserved it for being a whore... my Mom wasn't a whore though, she was perfect. But that dick banished her from the pack and I haven't seen her since... she begged him to take me with her but he refused. So she left alone and scared. I don't even know if she's still alive..." A single tear falls from his eye when he finishes talking.

"That's awful... I'm so sorry that you had to
go through that Coda... the minute that we get back home to my pack we will have everyone look for her I promise!" I state, my eyes watering at his story.

"Don't feel sorry yet. It just gets worse..." He gulps harshly, causing my face to drop in horror.

It gets worse? How? It was already such a horrible story.

Maybe he became a rogue to escape his father? That isn't too bad is it? But that still leaves a lot of my questions unanswered...

"Wait... you said that your Dad banished your Mother? Was he an Alpha?" I suddenly ask in shock, earning a nod from him as he scowls slightly in memory of his father.

"That explains why your wolf is so huge..." I mutter more to myself rather than to him, but he still hears me nonetheless.

"My father's wolf wasn't that big trust me... He was just an average Alpha. I would beat the shit out of him in a fight these days. He was nothing more than a coward. But yes, I do have Alpha and Luna blood in me, but I was just naturally a larger wolf than normal it has nothing to do with my father." He confirms sternly, as I nod not wanting to press him further.

He waits a minute, taking a small drink of water, before continuing-

"So as you can probably guess, I was forced to live with my father... I had to watch him come home with different females every night not understanding why he had gotten rid of my Mom. I truly think that at the age of 9, I was honestly depressed without my Mom. I cried every night without her. Hell! I even tried to sneak out during the night to look for her but I was caught by border patrol that brought me straight back. My father only started to beat me after that night... he told me that I would be a pathetic Alpha in the future..." My mouth was now fully open in horror as he continued to speak.

Surely this all can't get worse?!

"I went to school the next day with a black eye after I had tried to run away. Nobody questioned it either. Not even the kids in my class. They knew who my Dad was and they chose to stay quiet. But when I got to school that day, I had a new teacher. She was sweet, kind, genuine and trustworthy and she seemed to have a particular liking for me after being told that I was the Alphas son. She began bringing me sweets to school, helping me to put ice on my wounds after my Dad had beat me, she even made sure that I got lunch every day. Fuck she reminded me so much of my mother with how much she seemed to care..." I couldn't help but notice that his fists were now clenched tightly as he spoke.

He was seething with rage. But I couldn't quite tell who it was directed at so I stayed silent and waited...

"It was fake. Everything that witch of a teacher had done for me was fake. It was all a sick fucking lie to lure me here. She began telling me stories of a secret hidden land were rogues went to live happily... she said that she could take me there to help me look for my Mother and fuck did I want to go so bad after she had said that! I packed the little shit that I had left and that very same night she picked me up In her car and that was the last I seen of my father, my pack and most importantly my sanity." He looks down shamefully.

"Coda I didn't realise that you had been through this much..." A tear falls from my own eye, hearing his tragic story for the first time.

"There's more. I've not even told you the thing that I'm most scared to say out loud yet... I'm honestly scared to hurt you..." He mutters, looking ashamed of himself as he avoids eye contact with me.

My heart beat quickens, as I sit wondering what he could possibly mean by this... what could he have done to hurt me and make me not want to be his mate anymore?

I stare at him with fear evident in my eyes, waiting for him to say what he has to say...

"Maddison... since that evil woman brought me here... she's sexually abused and raped me since I was ten years old and she's been drinking my blood for years in order to become stronger and more powerful... I'm so sorry that I couldn't wait for you to be my first. If I would have had it my way then believe me I would have waited to sleep with you and do things right but this woman is too strong and I'm still too weak to even fight against her... even as a grown man which I'm ashamed of. I strangled you earlier because I promised myself when I first met you that I would never let you take advantage of me the same way that she does and the way you jumped on me earlier with your hands on my chest holding me down sent me into a frenzy... I'm weak against her but I figured I could hurt you which was wrong. I lost my temper and I'm sorry." He begins to sob, taking a few breaths again before continuing-

"The only reason I drink your blood is to keep me strong enough to protect you against normal wolves but as for her, she drinks every man is this place to their death. I'd be dead right now if it weren't for finding you..."

By this point he was a whimpering mess, I too was also a whimpering mess and all I could do was hug him.

I just hugged him tight whilst he broke down and cried.

This man. This strong, terrifying man was broken in so many ways. He's been mentally, physically and sexually abused for years and here he is worrying about losing me for something he could have never prevented.

"Listen to me. I do not hate you for any of this. None of this is your fault. You're so fucking strong and it's unbelievable to me how you've done it but you have. Your honestly amazing. The moon Goddess chose for you to be that horrible Alphas son so that you could take over and be a leader one day. You were born to make things right and I know you still will. I can see it in your eyes that you won't ever give up until we are both free from this. I can't believe you've lasted all these years and you've managed to endure so much. Coda I may not have known that we were mates for long, but just know that I truly know that I love you so much and I won't ever leave you. We will get through this together I promise."

I won't ever leave him.

Til death do us part. Truly.