51 - The fear of being an Aller

In his deepest dreams, Sebastian would have imagined carrying Helena to the door of the new apartment, she would laugh about it and they would both cry with happiness and then embrace, because of the new stage they were about to start as a couple.

But this was not the case. They both went up the elevator of the new building facing different sides, feeling the awkwardness of the silence.

They reached the floor where the newly purchased apartment was located and walked apart, the CEO in front and Helena hugging her backpack and looking at her feet as she walked behind.

The heir felt like shit, this shouldn't have been like this, he felt like he was about to cage a bird that deserved to fly free. That he would keep her in a beautiful, golden cage, yes, but not let her live independently.

-Well, here it is...- she said opening the door of the place she had just acquired furnished and ready to be used.

Helena shyly entered the apartment, she didn't feel victorious, that place she hadn't gotten it by her work and effort, as she had always dreamed since she knew she had to help her family.

"You got it by being a bitch" the cruel voice of her subconscious told her.

-It's cute," she sentenced curtly.

"Just cute? Is that all you're going to say?" the heir shouted inwardly.

He had looked at pictures of thousands of available apartments, trying to find the right one for the redhead, imagining which one would make her eyes sparkle with happiness, until he saw that one and knew it was the right one.

Although now she had her doubts.

The CEO gave her a tour of the new home, while Helena followed him silently through the beautifully lit rooms.

-And this last room is..." he coughed uncomfortably, as he opened the door and let his former secretary see the room that seemed to be for a child, "For your little brother," he exclaimed shyly.

Finally, Helena paid attention, staring with wide eyes and a gleam in her blue orbs at the room that would be any low-income boy's dream.

A bookshelf with many new and popular toys. A library with a variety of fantasy books. A desk with a computer and a double bed with a space picture comforter. It was just perfect.

-This is...

-I'm sorry if I went too far- replied the CEO quickly- I just thought that when I got out of the hospital- Sebastian realized at that moment that he was getting into a delicate subject and he didn't know if that would happen- I'm sorry, I'm an idiot.

-No no... It's perfect- she answered interrupting him, and turning to him, her sky blue gaze with a crystalline layer that melted the CEO- Thank you Sebastian.

The young heir couldn't remember when was the last time Helena had called him by his name, but he was sure that before it had been just out of obligation, but now, coming from those beautiful lips, in a genuine and unpressured way, Sebastian knew that he didn't want anyone else but her to name him like that. Just her.

-you're welcome," he exclaimed with a goofy grin.
Both remained silent, but it was not an uncomfortable silence, but one of those that make you get closer to the other person.

-Well, I'll leave you alone to settle in, later I'll come back with the money you asked for, okay?" he answered, cutting the atmosphere with a razor and returning to professionalism.

-Yes, it's fine," she answered, although she really didn't know what to do with such luxuries.

Sebastian nodded in greeting and left the apartment.

If it had been any other situation, the redhead would have screamed and jumped for joy, phoned anyone just to tell them the good news, and even planned a celebratory gathering. But she wasn't.

Still feeling uncomfortable and in a strange place, she silently walked through the rooms.

Could she really live in a place like this?

She didn't know. The place was beautiful, but it lacked love to make it a home.

He took a pencil and paper from the library and began to write a note to his little brother's nanny, the only person who had contact with him.

Please take care of Lucas in my absence, I have gotten a job abroad for almost a year, here I leave you an advance of my salary to pay for any medical expenses and for whatever you think is necessary. I will send more later.

Atte. Helena

PS: If he wakes up, tell him that I love him very much and that I am doing all this for him.

Helena folded the letter and kissed it, then rested it on her heart.

-You don't know how much I miss you Luquitas," she murmured painfully, wishing that her brother would never find out about all this.

After several hours, in which the redhead did nothing more than being an entity wandering around the rooms, finally the CEO returned along with food and shopping bags.

-Hi, I brought you enough food to last you for a week and also some ready-made food for dinner.

Helena nodded automatically, she felt she had to obey this man, who was helping her to fix all her stupid mistakes.

-And here you have half of what was agreed.

The young woman took the wooden paper envelope and from inside she took half of the money and then gave the envelope back to Sebastian who took it in confusion.

-I need you to give this money to David," she then took the letter, which she closed neatly in an envelope and gave it to him as well.

Sebastian took both things feeling that he was squeezing them tighter than he should.

-Can you do that for me? If not, I can go...

-No..." he interrupted her dryly "I'll do it, you eat and rest. I'll see you later in the week," he sentenced, leaving the apartment quickly, before Helena noticed his annoyance at hearing her name that idiot David.

"And on top of that he was giving her his money and a love letter?"

That infuriated him even more.

As soon as he stepped outside he furiously opened the letter, breaking the redhead's privacy, unable to contain his impulses because of the jealousy he felt knowing that Helena's heart might belong to someone else.

But when he read what the letter said, and saw the dried tears that had stained the paper, he knew he could always sink a little deeper into idiocy if he set his mind to it.

-You're stupid," he said to himself wanting to punch himself.

The CEO lifted his face to the balcony with the light on, where inside sat the redhead.

Something in him flared up, a need to want to be a better person for her.

Never before in his 32 years of life had he ever had the intention of wanting to change. He had only kept his feelings locked away, knowing he would never love anyone for fear of being an Aller.

But now he stood there, watching the balcony as if he were Romeo waiting for his Juliet to show herself, but with a fear rising from within, a fear of hurting the one he was truly beginning to love.