Chapter 43

Brooklyn's POV

I walked around my small apartment after taking a long shower, I still haven't heard from Scott or Felicity.

I mind-linked my other siblings and parents and told them that I was back and to please let me know if they could get a hold of Scott for me, I was worried about him.

My brothers it seemed went on ahead and brought over my couches and TV and other miscellaneous things from the storage unit. They were really good older brothers, I couldn't ask for any better brothers than them.

Someone knocking on the door brought me out of my thoughts, by the second knock I snapped out of them completely.

"Coming" I called out and pushed off the wall. I walked over to the door.

I had a smile on my face because I was expecting Felicty or a guard to let me know that they were here.

But not him.

How did he get here Without being seen?

I slammed the door in his face but he caught it with his hand, making the chain rattle against the wood. "Get out!" I said as he pushed the door open more and stepped in, I stepped away from him as he did. "Get out or I'll call my dad." I threatened him.

He closed the door behind himself then locked it. I moved towards the kitchen so I was closer to the knifes, just in case I have to fight him off if he tried to attack me again, even if everything hurt like crazy.

I placed my hands on my hips and looked up at the ceiling. "Don't you think you have done enough?" I asked him bitterly. My own mate won't look at me because of what I let him do.

"My family has shunned me, kicked me out. My father has cut me off. So before I left...."

"No!" I told him, cutting him off. I didn't care to know what it was he wanted or needed from me, I wasn't doing it. He has taken every bit of my energy and strength but he will not take my ability to say no. I didn't get the chance to say it before but I am now.

"But you didn't let me finish!" He stated and I laughed dryly.

"Neither did your uncle!" I said and he looked away his nostrils flaring. I think I hit a nerve.

"Why are you like this? It's so fucking hard to talk to you!" He snapped at me whilst taking a step closer. I took one back and held my hand up at him.

"Whatever it is you gave me is still messing with my wolf and my ablity to link people. You attack me again, it goes agaisnt both human and werewolf guidelines." I reminded him. It took me four attempts to get in touch with Bailey and my brothers, twice for my mom, I couldn't connect with Scott. I was exhausted by the time I was done.

He gave me a smirk. "Soo, we're both kinda human at the moment?" He cocks an eyebrow while looking me up and down.

I gave him a disgusted look. "I have neighbors, Ryan. They are aware of what has happened to me and that you aren't supposed to be here. So if I scream..." I snap my fingers. "..the Alphas will be called here in an instant!"

He dropped his smirk. "Why did you come here, Ryan?"  I didn't really want to know. I just wanted him to leave, my heart was on the verge of exploding in my ribcage from beating so fast. I needed to relax and with him around it was really hard to do that.

"I came to ask you if," he looked down and mumbled something before turning on his heel. But I didnt hear what he said.

"I didn't hear you!" I said in a shaky tone. He stopped and looked back at me.

"I asked if you were alright..?" He asked softly.

I looked at him with wide unsure eyes. He has never asked me if I was alright. Not even after he came home after putting my body through hell when we were together.

He has only ever cared about himself. So I truly didn't know how to answer him.

"Do you...." I took a deep breath in. "Do you feel bad for what you out me through, for what you did?" I asked him, it was such a brazen question that I had to applaud myself for having the courage to ask it.

He turned and faced me head on, his chest was puffed out like he was trying to be macho about it. "It bothers me that it bothers you."

"Such a sociopathic thing to say!" I mumbled to myself then looked back up at him.

"Listen, Ryan, this is what I've learned being with you this long.." I began and lookat him in the eyes. "Ryan, if hurting me, does not hurt you.." I olaced my hand over my heart "..then you don't love me you, you are using me."

He looked pained by what I said. "Because if my pain don't make you hurt, then nothing you do that causes it will ever change." I could feel my eyes burning with unshed tears but I refused to let them fall.

"If anything you owe me a sorry, or atleast acknowledge that you hurt me and take the blame for it. Don't just show up here, wondering how I'm feeling when you of all people don't deserve to know, let alone pop up to my place of residence unannouced." I exaggerated the last part a bit.

Although I was tempted to call the local police station and have a tresspassing warrant put on him, I knew he would find a way to break it, so I didn't.

I pointed at my door. "Now I'll ask you once more. Get out of my home. Or I will either call my brothers or the police." I told him through gritted teeth. My heart skipped a beat when his hands balled into fists and my knees buckled a little. I leaned against the counter so he wouldn't notice, thankfully he didn't.

He looked at my trembling hand then at the door. Within a second he dashed towards it, he slammed the door open so hard it bounced off the wall, Ryan almost ran into Felicity as she stood there with her hand up like she was about to knock on the door.

She glanced at the person who ran past her then at me then back at the person. I let my arm fall and allowed my tears to fall from my eyes like waterfalls. I let my body finally relax, but that was probably a bad idea because I nearly fell.

I grabbed the counter to steady myself then went over to the couch and sat down and buried my face in my hands.

Did Ryan show up here just to make me feel worse about myself all over again? Scott wanted nothing to do with me, and it was all because I allowed Ryan to touch me. It's not like I enjoyed it or remember most of it. I despised every second I do recall and will forever hate myself for metting it happen to begin with.

"Oh honey.." I felt arms wrap around me, I curled into her arms. "It's alright, everything will be alright now." She cooed.

I shook my head. I needed to find Scott. I had to hear him tell me that he loved me. That he would always protect me and be there for me. I had to hear him say those words or I wouldn't believe it from somebody else.

"I think he blames me!" I told her with a sob leaving my lips.

Felicity lifted her hand and placed it on my head, then began running her fingers through it. "He wouldn't do that. He knows how hard it is for us women to go through our heats." She defended him.

"Then where is he?" I asked her while raising my head up from her shoulder then removing my arms. "It's after midnight and he is nowhere to be found. Did he even know I was missing for hours today?" I asked her not giving her time to answer the first question.

"He loves you, Brooks!" Felicity told me softly.

"Are you sure about that?" I countered. "Because he isn't here with me, and helping me heal." I said and stood up.

"I think the guest bedroom is set up. If not the couch has a pullout mattress. I'll lend you a pillow and get you a blanket." I let Felicity know. She nodded her head and followed me down the hall. She knew I was done taljing about it.

We both checked the guest bedroom, it was set up thankfully, I told her goodnight and left her alone before I got her reply.

I went back down the hall and into my bedroom, after closing the door I closed my eyes and slid down the door. And once again today I felt tears fill my eyes.

I missed Scott. I knew he would be mad at me, I felt that in my heart. That's probably why Zena has abandonded me now too. She is grossed out at what I did.

I placed my face in my legs and cried, I sat there and cried until morning came through the curtians, illuminating my fragile state to the world where the darkness hid it.