An Asset

"I'm a law abiding citizen, an assert to the U.S government, and you..." he shook his head, and buried his face in his hands. "The Government invested millions into creating my background and my training. It would raise a controversy if I pursued this. Nuru, you should be with someone your own age and if I had any sense at all — I'd let you go — but I don't... and here I am."
I wanted to say something but I couldn't. The anger made my teeth tremble. I took two steps before he caught my arm.
"What do you want from me then, Roman?"
"I can't stand the distance any longer," he said, he closed his eyes and sighed a huge sigh. "It's very... painful — you can't possibly imagine how horrific — for me to stay away from you, for me not to see your smile."
I looked up at him anxiously, my thoughts a derailed mess.
"I'm a jerk," he continued. "I know. But you'll forgive me right?"
"If you go down on your knees, I might."
"You want me to worship you?" He teased, but then his smile faded and he was serious again. "I already do that."
I smiled but he was serious again and he turned me around completely to look at him. He sandwiched my face between his hands. And leaned into me so that he would captivate my eyes with his own.
"You've got to know one thing." He leaned into my face even closer.
And it was hard for me to concentrate. I closed my eyes. It was easier that way.
"What's that?"
"Your safety comes first, your happiness after that," he told me with annoyed clarity.
"Okay," I agreed. "I understand.

In the morning, I lay in bed glaring at the ceiling. I couldn't sleep at all the night before knowing that Roman was in the other room just within a ten feet walk and I couldn't be with him, couldn't fall asleep in his arms. What was he doing? Was he calling Hazel?
I sighed and tried to enjoy the quietness. After my cold shower I pulled on a yellow sundress, grabbed an apple and searched the TV channels for something to pass time. It was still too early for school.
Roman jiggled his car keys and I looked up at him. At his perfect face. I looked away. I had to remind myself of the need for caution.
"Ready to go?"
"Where am I going?" I asked.
"Campus." he frowned. "You're not staying at home today, are you?"
I nodded and followed him to his Range Rover. He helped me into the car.
Once he was strapped in, he turned to make sure my seat belt was secure before meeting my stare and flashing me a smile that cut my breathing short and momentarily stopped my heart. How could a single human being have such compelling features? If he wasn't human that would explain a lot but now... he left me tongue-tied.
"How was your night?" He asked worriedly.
I frowned. "Good. How was yours?"
"I couldn't sleep at all."
I couldn't help wondering if our reasons for not being able to sleep were the same. That uncertainty triggered an ache in my heart.
"May I ask why?"
"No, you may not." He winked at me.
I stared at his face in disbelief. Did he really have no idea what was doing to me?
"Regina, your ex..." I paused, searching through my vocabulary for the right words. "Where is she?"
"Honestly, I don't know." And he smiled, "And quite frankly I don't care."
"Don't you miss her?"
He shrugged. "Should I?"
The car started moving.
"Stop doing that. It's frustrating," I mumbled in irritation.
"What? Answering your questions with a question."
"Duh."
I waited, not breathing, while he deliberated.
"I'll get us a movie this weekend and we'll watch it together," he said and his voice sounded unsure. And I realized he was giving me a choice.
"Yes," I whispered. My answer came too quickly. My voice too enthusiastic. Any excuse to spend time with him.
From the corner of my eye I watched him hesitate before he spoke again.
"So how long have you been single?"
The question was so unexpected it made me glance up at him. "What?"
"Well I know you're a virgin but I want to know how many able bodied men couldn't convince you to harass them sexually?"
I looked out of the window, embarrassed. "Not even one."
He had an odd expression in his face. "Are you even into guys?"
"Are you a guy?" I asked.
He pressed his lips into a thin line as understanding dawned on him. He pulled into the driveway and I grimaced — holding that expression firmly in place — the disappointment instantly took over my insides.
He frowned down at me. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I grumbled.
"Come on, you can tell me anything."
I hesitated and placed a hand on the door. "Forget it."
He groaned. "Come on, Nuru, please." his voice sang with a seduction that no human possessed.
I didn't answer and he shifted to unleash the full force of his convincing eyes.
"Please, Nuru, please."
I pursed my lips and tried to hide my blush. "No." it was very hard to keep a straight face.
"If you don't tell me, you know I won't be able to concentrate the whole day at work, wondering about this conversation. It's so frustrating not knowing what you're thinking."
"Uh... okay... I... Um," I began but then lost my nerve.
"Yes...?" he encouraged.
I glanced at the dashboard and said in such a rush I was certain he wouldn't be able to hear. "I don't want to be away from you."
He reached up, hesitantly, to run the back of his hand over my cheek. "I'll be here, waiting for you when your class finishes."
"Can I ask what you'll do?"
Roman shifted his weight from foot to foot, uncomfortable. "Probably get some work done." His evasiveness made his voice sound strained.
I looked at him curiously. I wanted to know everything about him, wanted to know what he was thinking, looking at me like that.
"You're so complicated, and hard to understand," I blurted out honestly, lately, I noted, my thoughts were refusing to stay as such.
"You think I'm complicated?" he murmured under his breath. "You're hundred times worse."
The silence charged with flickers of electricity. My teeth locked together, trying to calm myself down. My heart was racing.
Roman twitched uneasily and took a breath. "Would you like me to get you some thing for lunch?" He asked. He was just trying to take control of the situation, after all I had a lunch box with me.
"You can cook for me tonight," I said, staring at him warily. "Can you even cook?"