No Answer

"I don't want this" — he gestured a hand between us — "but why can't I see a future without it?" He sighed angrily and looked away. "It baffles me."
"Oh," I gasped, his words finally making sense.
"I haven't always been fair to you, Nuru," he whispered. "Do you think you could ever forgive me?"
"I forgive you," I mumbled. "What did you say you did again?"
The way he looked me was unnerving, staggering and then he smiled, running his hand through my curls.
His eyes were still fierce. "You're the most humane person I know."
I barely heard him over the drum behind my ears.
"As I was saying..." he looked away from me. "I didn't want to be with you" — he scoffed — "who am I kidding. I wanted to be with you but I knew I shouldn't. But, sick, I know... I couldn't see anyone good enough to be with you."
"Not even you," I guessed. I wasn't able to hide the cracks of panic in my voice. I glared at him.
"Yes," he agreed. "I still think you can do so much better."
His resentment was baffling. I shook my head once. "Better than you?"
He glared back, frustrated.
I looked away first, folding my arms across my chest. "Stupid jerk."
He chuckled. "You like swearing at me." His eyes glanced at the dashboard and he sighed. I thought I saw a hint of disappointment in his eyes. "I have to go," he mumbled.
"See you later, I guess."
He reached across the car and pulled my hair into a ponytail. My heart skidded to an abrupt stop. He smiled, staring at my face.
"There," he said, the grim still on his face. "You're beautiful. Stop hiding behind your hair."
I opened the door and with one last look at him I stood on the parking lot. He drove away. I watched the car disappear out of sight.
I met up with Zoe at the entrance.
"Was that Roman?" she asked immediately and with enthusiasm.
I nodded. "Yes it was."
"Why is he always with you?"
"I'm just as puzzled by that as you are," I said honestly. "I mean, he could have almost any woman he wants, right?"
Zoe nodded, her eyes speculative, her face closed off.
"But he's a bit older than you don't you think?" she said, her tone rebellious.
"So?"
"So," she began, staring at the floor. "Don't you think you should be going after guys your own age?"
"We aren't dating, Zoe," I said curtly.
"But you're spending too much time with him," Zoe mumbled her dismay.
I frowned, uncertain, puzzled. "And that bothers you because?"
Zoe shrugged, scrambling for a response. "I know it's none of my business b—"
"You just said it, it's none of your business," I snapped. "Stay out of it."
"I'm just saying."
"I didn't ask for you opinion," I mumbled and my eyes narrowed. "Butt out."
We met up with the rest of the group and I quietly withdrew from the conversation. I just made sure to laugh when it was appropriate, gasp dramatically when it was expect.
When the school day finally ended, I caught myself singing off tune to a song playing on Melissa's Ipod. My friends noticed as well as I practically skipped to the parking lot.
"You're better than this morning," Chad told me.
"What?"
"Your mood," he said, returning my smile. "You're cheerful. I like it better this way."
"Oh that." I shrugged. And the second we broke outside I was searching for his car. Of course, he was already there, leaning against his car, arms folded across his chest — the picture of perfection.
I took a second to admire him and then waved goodbye to my friends.
"Wanna get out of here?" Roman asked me. He was already opening the passenger side door for me.
"Thought you'd never ask."
We drove in silence for a while. I contemplated letting my hair fall over my face. I could feel his burning gaze on me. Couldn't he look at the road or something?
"Can I ask where we're going?"
He sighed but didn't answer, I noticed that he was nervous and he clenched the wheel with white knuckles. Even his hands were shaking and naturally that worried me.
I reached my hand out to his, to silently let him know I was here for him. He flinched at my touch and I couldn't help but swallow nervously.
It was extremely hard to concentrate on looking out of the window when my eyes wanted to feast on him instead. Caution, I reminded myself.
"I seriously hope you weren't planning on killing me, today."
He almost smiled. Almost. "No, not really. "
"If not then stop driving like a maniac."
He decelerate to a much more acceptable pace. To slow for him but still a little fast for my liking.
We drove until the houses were replaced by highways and trees. I fidgeted with my hands. His gaze was still on my face. I hoped we'd reach our destination soon.
Five minutes later the car came to a stop and I glanced up, surprise made me purse my lips. "A cemetery?"
He nodded and got out of the car.
"I thought you said you weren't burying me today."
He grimaced but said nothing. I could feel the nervous tension rolling off of him as we walked side by side between the tombstones. Even then, with unseen decomposing bodies laying around, I only felt chills from the overwhelming electricity flowing through me from him.
"This way," he said, grabbing my arm in his impatient hand as I fell back a few feet.
"A cemetery?" I said again, panic clear on my voice.
"I told you I'm not planning to kill you today," he told me, glancing at me with annoyed disapproval. "Or any other day. I want you around for a long time."
"That's not what worries me," I whispered desperately.
"What then?"
My answer came as a gush. "Ghosts."
He stiffened for a second. "Ghosts?" he asked with a trace of disbelief. "In the twenty first century, Nuru?"
I pursed my lips. "Well things happen. You're here!"
He chuckled. "I'm not a ghost."
I led the way. He followed behind me. "Well I know that dammit."