Chapter Twenty Five

Jay:
"From now, you are not free to do anything you want. Now let me show you how hard it is to bear when our loved ones hurt us," I said.

Vidya bent her eyes not to look at me as she was so scared of me.

"Look at me, Vidya."

Vidya looked at me and her eyes are filled with tears, making me weak. Her tears hurt me the most.

"From today, you should never cry before me. If you cry, I won’t come to home anymore. Decide yourself."

Vidya immediately wiped her tears.

"No, I won’t cry."

"Good. Second thing is that you should do whatever I say without argument. Third, Never go out without my permission. Fourth, give me your credit and ATM cards. You are not allowed even to spend a single penny without my acceptance. If you didn’t follow any of these, I will be avoiding you permanently."

Vidya nodded.

"One more thing is you should answer me with words and not by nodding. This is also one of the rules you need to follow."

"Ok."

"Handover your mobile to me. If you didn’t get idea to use it when required, I don’t think you need it."

Vidya handedover her cards and mobile to me.

"Now get ready and bring me a coffee."

Vidya left to get ready and I remembered my behaviour with her. Tears appeared in my eyes.

As you didn’t care for my feelings, from today I am not going to care for your feelings too. I will show you how painful it is when the one whom we love the most won’t care for us. I hate you, Vidya. I hate you.

Vidya got ready and brought coffee for me. I sipped it and threw it on the floor.

"Is this coffee? The worst coffee I have ever drank. Get out of my sight," I shouted at her.

Vidya eyes got moisten but she controlled herself remembering my conditions and went off from there. After sometime, I came downstairs but seeing Vidya, I tried to go off.

"Jay, breakfast is ready," Vidya said.

"Did you prepare it?"

"Yes."

"But I am not going to eat it."

"Why are you showing your anger at food. Please, have it," Vidya said.

"Don’t argue with me."

"I am not arguing with you, Jay. I am just requesting you."

"I am not having it because I want you to wait for me without eating until I eat after returning home. I want to see how much you love me."

"Ok. I won’t have anything until you return home."

"Good. I will see."

I left to the office. I went home at 1 AM. I saw Vidya sleeping on the sofa. By seeing her face I understood she is weak and remembered my words said to her in the morning. I checked the dishes and found that Vidya didn’t eat anything until now. I forgot my words being busy with work but now seeing her so weak, I remembered those words. I woke her up.

"Vidya, please wake up."


Vidya saw me coming out of her slumber.

"I slept just now waiting for you."

"Are you mad? I just said you to wait for me without having food in anger. Atleast you should have called me to remind me to return home sooner. Anyways, first have this food," I said.

"Did you have food?"

"No. First you eat and then, I will have it," I said as I am worried for her health.

"Shall we have together?" Vidya said and I agreed immediately.

We had food and I stared at her scolding myself for hurting her so much. But when Vidya looked at me, I behaved as if I don’t even care for her. Vidya slept after having the food.

"Should I remind you everyday to take tablets?" I said.

Vidya smiled at me. I understood that Vidya remembered me messaging her everyday from time to time to take tablets even though I didn’t talk with her.

"Stop smiling and take tablets."

Vidya took tablets.

I went near to her and cupped her face. I kissed her lips but Vidya didn’t respond. I know she was frightened remembering the way I kissed her in the morning. I acted as if I am going to bite her lip again. But then left her.

"I am sorry for behaving stupidly in the morning. I lost myself and became a bit wild in temper. I really didn’t want to behave like that with you. But surely I don't love you anymore," I said wantedly though I still love her so much.

I saw Vidya and found her sleeping. I caressed her hairs and kissed her softly not to disturb her sleep. I covered her with blanket.

I don’t like hurting you. But why did you kill our baby? Why didn’t you care for my feelings. I love you so much but you don’t love me. I want to love you, care for you and keep you happy every second. But now because of you, I am hurting you. I will make you realise your mistake by being rude to you. I do not care even if it hurts you.

I was about to get out of the bed but Vidya held my hand. I turned and looked at her. I tried to free my hand but found that she is sleeping peacefully holding my hand. I laid down beside her without disturbing her sleep. In sleep, she hugged me and started murmuring.

"I am sorry, Jay. I really care for you and your feelings. I love you so much. Please, forgive me. Don’t be angry with me. Don’t leave me, please. I can’t leave without you."

I looked at her and found she is crying in sleep too. My anger went off at once seeing her in that stage and I took her close to me. I made her to sleep on my chest, holding her tightly in my arms. I caressed her hairs and whispered in her ears.

"I won’t be angry at you. I won’t leave you too. Please sleep peaceful. I am here with you and will be with you forever."

Vidya hugged me and started crying. I think she woke up as I held her tightly.

"Don’t cry. Sleep now."

Vidya slept and I too slept. In the morning, I woke up and saw Vidya arranging my clothes. I woke up and got ready. I am observing her but didn’t show her that I am seeing her. Vidya gave coffee to me and I had it calmly but neither complemented nor scolded her. Vidya called me for the breakfast and I followed her to have the breakfast. Suddenly, Vidya fainted. I caught her and brought her to the bedroom. I made her sleep on the bed and called the doctor. The doctor came and checked on Vidya.

"Mr. Jay, your wife is so weak because of internal bleeding caused at the time of miscarriage. She should be happy and tension free. Worrying and tension makes her health worst. It may even put her life into danger. Please take care of her.

One more thing, as a woman, I can say how much stressed she is after thst abortion. She is totally shattered. Give her a hope and reason to live. Otherwise at any time she may lose hope and her life too. If anything can make her normal, it's only your love. Give her your love and she will recover soon."

The doctor left and I sat beside her. I remembered how badly I treated her without understanding her pain and health condition. She is depressed and craving for my love. And what I did is ignoring her completely.

"I am sorry, Vidya. I didn’t understand your situation and hurt you a lot. I am really sorry. You are more important to me than our baby. I won’t put your life in risk. I love you and I will love you forever," I said with tears. Tears fell on her face as she is on my lap, and Vidya opened her eyes.


"Why are you crying?"

"Nothing. How are you?"

"I am fine. Just a bit weak. That's it."

"Ok, take rest."

I was about about to leave but Vidya held my hand.

"Please stay with me for some time. Please, Jay."

"I am going to bring food for both of us. Let's have it first and then I will be with you for the whole day. Don’t worry, sweetheart."

I made her to eat and I too had food. Then, for the whole day I spent with her chit chatting. Vidya felt relaxed as I didn’t show anger at her and made her to feel my love.

"Jay, shall I ask you one thing?" Vidya said.

"Yes."

"You said I killed our child. But do you know I saved many lives. Is this nation India and Indians more important than us and our happiness?"

I looked at her with her straight question.

"I didn’t get you," I said.

"By sending that clone as the District Collector, they planned a blasting on the Independence Day as no one checks a collector. That's the reason, I risked my life. I felt I can sacrifice my life if I can save the lives of many people. Now tell me, am I wrong in risking my life? We are sad for losing our child but we must be happy for saving our nation," Vidya said.

I looked at her surprisingly as I never saw this version of Vidya till now. I remembered my sister’s words who said nothing is more important than India and we can sacrifice anything for the sake of our nation.

I kissed her on the forehead.

"I am sorry for misunderstanding you, Vidya. You are right. Nothing is wrong if it is to protect our nation. I am proud of you."

"I need to discuss this with Suhana. Because I think they won’t be idle. We flapped their plan but they may plan something else. We should find out and reach the one who is helping them in our nation. We should save the people."

"But for that we need your parents to come into conscious. Shwetha revealed the names of a few persons but before we reach there, they are shot dead," I said.