Chapter 100

***Alicent***

His hands cover my eyes, fingers splayed awkwardly as my son’s voice buzzes with excitement behind me. “No peeking, Mom!” His palms are warm against my face, and I can’t help but smile. 
It’s a struggle not to stumble as he guides me forward, his chin resting on my shoulder. Az’s growing so fast; he’s as tall as me now. I wonder how much longer I’ll get to enjoy moments like this before he’s too cool to spend some time with his mom.  
A few minutes ago, Ethan and Az showed up in my room to get me. They said they had a surprise for me, which felt a little odd because, up until yesterday, Az seemed really upset with Ethan. 
What Ethan doesn’t know is that after I fled here, Az kept asking me over and over why Ethan hadn’t come to visit us or if he’d at least called or asked about him. My little one’s been looking up to Ethan so much that after spending months living together, he started picking up some of Ethan’s mannerisms, something he never did with his own father, even though he loved him dearly. And I thank God for that.
I let him lead me, my hands outstretched to avoid walking straight into a wall. “Are we there yet?” I tease with a smile. 
Az just huffs, his breath tickling the back of my neck. “Patience, Mom. Almost.”  
A few more steps, and I feel the soft cushion of grass under the sole of my foot. The sunlight warms my skin, and the faint scent of flowers floats by on a gentle breeze. 
“Okay... ready?” Az asks, barely able to contain his excitement. I nod, and his hands fall away.  
My eyes flutter open, and I freeze, breath catching in my throat.  
A picnic. 
An actual gigantic picnic. 
Right here, like something out of a storybook. There’s a blanket laid out, perfectly spread, and so plush! Pillows are scattered around, big, fluffy ones that look like clouds that got tired of floating. 
My jaw practically hits the floor as my eyes try to take in everything at once.
There are delicate sandwiches with the crusts cut off, piled high on silver trays. Some are oozing with cheese and herbs, others stacked with layers of vibrant vegetables. I spot croissants, golden and flaky, probably straight from the oven because I can almost smell the butter. Little tarts topped with glossy fruit that looks almost too pretty to eat. 
“I think she liked it,” my son whispers from behind me, followed by Ethan’s chuckle.
There’s a pitcher of something pink, dotted with slices of lemon and sprigs of mint on a table on the other side. It sparkles under the sun, ice cubes clinking like tiny bells. Next to it, crystal glasses are arranged like they’re waiting for royalty. 
I don’t even want to touch them. 
I might break one and owe someone my soul.  
I blink, finally tearing my eyes away from the spread, and notice the backdrop. The garden wraps around the side of the mansion, bursting with flowers so colorful and vibrant they almost look fake. 
“Do you like it?” I hear Ethan’s voice, almost hesitant. 
“Did you make all this by yourself?” I ask, still not turning around.  
“Well, most of it was Az and me, but Mom swooped in with her ‘special touch.’ She said you deserve the best and wouldn’t let me get away with anything less. So, blame her if it’s too perfect.”
Although I want to reply to him, the mansion’s huge backyard is distracting me.
I turn my head to the massive fountain with water cascading down in sheets. The sunlight catches in the droplets, making them sparkle like tiny diamonds. 
Seriously, what is this place? 
Is Blackmoon enchanted or what?  
I take a few steps forward, still too stunned to fully process what I’m seeing. 
Who does something like this? 
Why is Ethan so invested in me?
My heart feels warm, my chest a little tight. No one’s ever done anything like this for me before.  
I don’t want to fall into temptation again with him, not after everything I’ve been through, but goddamnit, it’s getting hard.
I glance back up at the mansion so the tears from my eyes do not fall, I see its tall windows glinting in the morning sun. Did they... did they really do all of this just for me? 
My face heats up at the thought, and I sniff. Then I quickly look down, pretending to inspect the edge of the fancy blanket. But the butterflies in my stomach give me away.  
“Do you like it?” my son asks, making me finally turn to them. His eyes are wide and hopeful, his face beaming with pride. 
I give him a smile, and he smiles back, then he looks up at Ethan next to him with a toothy smile. Ethan winks at him, the corners of his lips lifting up.
My heart melts. 
I pull Az into a tight hug, ruffling his blonde hair, which earns me a loud, exaggerated groan. “Mom! Not the hair!”  
I giggle, blinking back the tears that threaten to spill. “I love it,” I whisper, my voice cracking just a little. I look up at Ethan’s black eyes. “It’s perfect.”  
Ethan has no idea what kind of chaos he’s caused inside my heart. Or maybe the bastard does.
Then his voice is firm, “Little Dove, you shouldn’t walk barefoot.”
I look at my feet, wiggling my toes. “I like walking barefoot. I like to feel the ground beneath my feet.”
“But you could stand on something sharp and hurt yourself,” Ethan adds, crossing his arms. He is wearing a t-shirt that, despite being dark blue, outlines every muscle of his.
*Don’t look at his muscles. Don’t give in to temptation.*
But logic pales so pitifully in the face of Ethan’s biceps.
“Oh yeah. Mom, you should have shoes on.” Az shakes his head slightly, mirroring Ethan's stance by crossing his arms, too. I struggle to not laugh. Then he spins around and dashes into the mansion, calling over his shoulder without even looking back, “I’ll grab your flip-flops, Mom!”
I gape before smiling. “Did you just see that? Az thinks he gets to tell me off now.” 
“Hmm, it means I’ve got someone to help me keep an eye on you,” Ethan comments, cupping my face with his big hand. 
“What?” I drone, glaring at him, less annoyed than I want to admit. Then I come to my senses concerning the fact I’ve been letting him touch me. I pull away. “You’re all ganging up on me.” 
“It’s not ganging up on you,” Ethan tells me. “We care about you.” 
I peek up to find his black eyes intent on me. 
He can’t be serious...
But before I can find words to say, Ethan bends down, his hands wrapping around my waist, and effortlessly lifts me up. In one smooth motion, he sets me down a couple of steps away, settling me onto one of the soft pillows.
“Ethan!” I squeal. 
“Yes?” 
“You can’t just lift me like that!” 
“Why not?” When his hands let me go, they slightly brush against my already stiff nipples. 
God, help me. 
Ethan starts by placing some pastries and mini triangles sandwiches on a big plate. “Would you like me to fill a croissant for you?”
“Are you filling a plate for *me*?”
“Of course, Little Dove,” he replies without looking at me, continuing to diligently fill the white plate with little gold decorations on the rim. “Would you like me to fill a croissant?” he asks again.
“Sure,” I chirp, shrugging like it is no big deal he piling food onto my plate before making his own. My squirmy insides would beg to differ, but Ethan doesn’t need to know that.

🐺 🐺 🐺
***Alpha Ethan***

My dad is grinning so wide, his eyes twinkling at my fated mate currently sitting next to Mom, who’s peering around the room, genuinely happy because everything ended up being the way she planned. 
I shove away a spark of jealousy over the way my parents and Little Dove are smiling at each other. 
When Az came back with her flip-flops, he didn’t come alone. Lily, Vi, and my parents came with him, and soon after that, Josh, Maggie, and Theo showed up.
And now my Little Dove’s in here giving that megawatt grin to other people, who are grinning back at her. And I feel like I want all her smiles for myself. 
The way she lit up when she saw the picnic set up in the packhouse backyard was priceless. So precious. It’s a moment I’ll never forget.
And if I am honest, it nearly had me puffing out my chest in satisfaction.  
Mom stands up, walks over to the table across from where we’re sitting, and picks up two thin glasses. She mixes up mimosas on the glasses and then glides back to her seat, settling in gracefully. “Try this, Allie,” she says, handing her a glass, then she hands the other one to my dad. “I learned how to make it from a chef in Paris.”
I can hardly contain my smile seeing the three of them getting along well. “What about a drink for me?” I tease, but Mom knows I don’t like mimosas.
“You know where the table is,” Mom replies, making my Little Dove giggle. 
“Well, I know where I stand in the family tree now,” I answer. 
“Apparently, at the bottom with me then!” Vi adds, making her own mimosa. However, unlike me, who is not very fond of mimosa, Vi likes hers, specifically the way she prepares it, so even if Mom made it, she would probably remake it.
Mom rolls her brown eyes, shaking her head, but she still smiles at my sister. 
Across the yard, Az, Lily, and Theo are playing near the fountain. While Josh and Maggie are cuddled up on the edge of the blanket, almost asleep.
“You want some?” Little Dove asks shyly from beside me, offering me her glass.
“No, baby, but thank you.”
I stare at the red flush that lingers on her cheek, marveling. 
*Mine*, I think, happy, covetous, greedy. 
It’s a new feeling of belonging. And owning. 
After my parents chatted enthusiastically with her, Mom and Dad got up to go to the kitchen, but when they came back, Little Dove was snuggled up on the blanket, dozing. 
My poor Little Dove! She’s been so exhausted, at least she feels safe enough to let her guard down and sleep next to me.
Despite having stopped eating, everyone remained seated, chatting about the latest pack stuff. Beside me, Little Dove stirs and rests her head on my thigh. I start stroking her soft hair as I answer their questions. On the other side, I hear the children’s laugh as they play happily.
“She’s almost waking up,” Dad says, also listening to her heartbeat. “Let’s all go inside so you can finally tell her, son.”
I nod. “I think I’ll take her for a walk in the woods,” I reply as they stand up. “Alicent loves that trail nearby.”
As my parents, Maggie, Josh, and Vi, walk through the door of the packhouse, Little Dove wakes up. I smile, but inside, I feel anxious.
“Hey, baby—” I glance at her face, tears streaming down her cheeks. “What happened? Did you have a nightmare?”
I cup her jaw with one hand and wipe her tears with the other. “No,” she answers.
“Then why are you crying?”
“It’s because I had a really, really good dream.”
“Was I in it?” I ask with a smirk. “Naked?”
She rolls her eyes. “You weren’t naked, Ethan,” she replies with a smile as I keep gently brushing the tears from her cheek. 
“But I was there?”
“Yes,” she breathes out, staring up at me with a look of such intense happiness that it shocks me into silence for a moment. “I dreamed I had a daughter. I watched her grow up and become a beautiful woman with... your eyes. I felt so happy when she got into college, and then when she got her dream job. She came to tell us happily that she had also found the love of her life.” She looks down at her hands in her lap. “But she cried afterward, and when you worriedly asked her why she was sad, I just woke up. It was all so real. It felt like she was real, like you are here right now by my side... The way Az was happy when she was born and called himself her big brother...” She starts to cry silently. 
“Hey, baby.” I pull her up and sit her on my lap. 
“I’m sorry.” She wipes her tears away this time.
“It’s okay.” I tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear.
Little Dove looks up at me. “It was all so real, Ethan. I swear! I had never dreamed of something like that before. I know it sounds weird, but it felt like I lived it all.” Tears fall from her eyes. Her voice is weak and soft, “I loved my little girl, and I can’t believe that it was all a dream, you know?” She blinks hard. “That she never existed.”
“What’s her name?”
Little Dove shakes her head. “No. I don’t want to say her name out loud. It’s already too painful knowing that I woke up and my little girl doesn’t exist.”
I wipe the tears from her face with my thumbs. For a moment, I think about it. When Alicent was sleeping, not only me, but also my father noticed that her aura was shining brighter than usual. I’ve never seen her sleep this close to me so long before, which is entirely my fault, so I had no way of knowing if this was normal or not.
“I miss her,” she says with a small pout.
I wrap my arms around her. “Let’s make one then!”
“Ethan!” She playfully slaps my chest. “I’m being serious here.”
“Well, me too!”
“Ugh. I hate you!” She states, looking up at my eyes. Her voice gives her away, though. Soft and breathy. And her eyes…
I pull us both to our feet at the same time. Then I ask, “Let’s take a walk.”
Her brows knit together for a moment. It wasn’t a question, but she nods. “Uh, sure.”
I take her delicate hand in mine, and we start heading toward the trail she’s so fond of. I’m starting to get anxious with anticipation.
I pull her hand up to my mouth and press a kiss to the back of her knuckles to calm myself down.
It feels good. 
Perfect. 

🐺 🐺 🐺
***Alicent***

We walk lazily along the trail with our hands entwined. No wonder I like this place; it seems like an enchanted forest. I don’t ask where we are going, though. Frankly, I’m still thinking about my perfect dream.
Unable to stop myself, I lean against his arm, my cheek resting on his big biceps as we walk. Ethan glances down at me, then I feel him kissing the top of my head. 
“You feel pretty right just there.” 
Just that small gesture alone and his words have me curling my toes in delight, trying to contain the rush of happiness bubbling inside me.
Yes. I feel pretty right to him as well.
“Why are we here, Ethan?” I ask, and he stops walking.
Turning to me, Ethan cups my cheek. 
For no reason. 
He just seems to... want to touch me. 
And I’m already a little addicted to his heat, so I lean into it like I am well past needing an intervention. I should hold back, but it’s really hard around him, I feel this odd pull...
“Do you want to talk to me about something?” I ask, confused when he doesn’t say anything.
“Yes, my Little Dove.” 
And there it is. 
The words that send more heat and happiness rushing through me. That has me wanting to do anything for him, just to hear him call me *his Little Dove*. 
Good Lord, I have it bad. 
*Get a grip, Allie!*
I take a step back, away from his hand on my face. “What do you want?”
“You.”
“Last time I heard that, I ended up regretting it.” That’s a low blow. Ethan isn’t Logan, but I still find myself saying it.
I swallow, stare, and watch his pupils darken and grow until only the barest rim of his irises circle them. 
“Say you trust me. Ask me anything, and I’ll give it to you.” 
My heart skips a beat, and as though he’s able to hear his effect on me, he smiles.
Oh, what I wouldn’t give to wipe that smug grin off his face. “I told you, Ethan. I don’t want a relationship like we had before anymore. I deserve better than that, and I won’t accept being your second choice or not getting an ‘I love you’ back because you *can’t* love. I don’t want to live like that anymore, no matter how hard it is for me to let you go—”
I don’t get to finish the sentence. Because Ethan’s kissing me ravenously like he’s never going to stop, and I’m kissing him back in the same way because I’m that weak.
And suddenly, I’m boneless. I know I need to fight him, but my body refuses, mistaking his big arms around me for somewhere safe. I hate that he can be both so gentle and so maddening.
He reaches out and grabs my hand, then places it in his heart. “You feel this?” Ethan asks, his forehead against mine. I hear the thump thump of his heart racing. “It only beats for you, Little Dove. Every second I spent away from you when you were gone... It felt like I was dying a slow death. Like I was suffocating.” He let out a low chuckle humorlessly. “And I know I deserved it for everything I put you through. I couldn’t breathe all this time until I saw you and Az again at my house.” He lets go of my hand, and in one smooth motion, both of his come up to cradle my face. It’s warm. And I feel so safe. I whimper when I realize right then that I’m crying. Ethan goes on with his deep voice. “I don’t just love you, Little Dove. You’re the air in my lungs, baby. I need you to survive. You’re my first and only choice. You’re just mine.”
His head moves away a bit, enough that I can look into Ethan’s gaze, and see starlight in the inky black of his eyes.
I find myself asking the question I’ve been asking myself ever since he found me at the house where I was living with Logan and Az in Summerville. “Why now, Ethan? Why so suddenly? You’ve had so many opportunities. You just...”