Chapter 111

***Alpha Ethan*** 

Lost in a sea of calm meadow-green eyes, I stare down at the tiny female, *my* tiny female, her beauty beyond anything I could’ve fantasized during all those foul years. 
“And then, when I finally woke up, two months had passed.” I relive my nightmares. She sits stiffly on the garden bench, listening intently as I share stories from my life. With every new detail I’ve been revealing, I can see her body growing more tense. Despite the bright sunlight, the sprawling canopy of the tree beside us drapes the area in cool shade. “But the real horror started when I saw you two together again.” Despite the memory making my body rage, I try to focus on her angelic face in front of me. 
I promised her there would be no more lies between us, and I meant it. 
But, Goddess above. It’s fucking hard. Mainly because she still doesn’t show any interest in accepting our mate bond.
My eyes find her frame again. The sight of her makes my whole damn chest hurt like I can’t breathe or something. Happens every time I look at her, and that sweet scent, the natural aroma of her skin, has me drooling like a starved wolf. 
Possession burns in the pit of my gut, and I can rightly say I’d kill and destroy anything that ever tried to hurt her, or Az, again. 
“The rest, I already filled you in on that day when we got back from Summerville. I swear, Little Dove, that’s all!” I take a deep breath, blinking hard. My body is itching for me to pull her to me. Locking my eyes with hers again, I confess once more. “My heart had long decayed by the time you’d entered the picture. But you, love, blew off my dead heart’s dust with your sweet breath. Soaped off its tombstone with your capable hands every time you chose me. You breathed life into my dead heart with your unbearable, undeniable sweetness.” 
Before I can blink again, Alicent’s warmth envelopes me, taking me by surprise. Her body presses against mine, if she leans in a little bit more, she sits on my lap. 
The thought barely crosses in my mind, and just like that, she does it. Still hugging me, she sits, curled up in my lap as her head tucks beneath my chin, her arms firmly wrapped around my middle. 
I cling to her, desperate to feel her soft skin against mine. “That’s how I should have known, Little Dove,” my voice is barely above a whisper, spoken directly against my heart. “I should have known you’re mine. Even though I tried to lie to myself, I should have fucking realized how I felt about you. Because no curse,” I say, my voice steady but fierce, “could ever be strong enough to tear my love for you apart since I laid my eyes on you.” I stroke my hand up and down her back, my arms squeezing around her. The touch makes her nestle in closer, and I don’t know how I’d be able to go back to not holding her like this every day if she decides to not forgive me. 
My eyes shut. How ironic that I’m describing the very event that made me cursed to never find my fated mate to the woman who’d shamelessly clawed her way into my damaged soul. 
When she moves away, sitting back where she was before, I release my breath, my skin tingling from where her body’s touched me. 
Will she always have such a hold over me? 
Over my body? 
Will I always feel like this in her presence like I do? 
I sure hope so.
But I don’t force her to sit back on my lap. 
No. I accept every crumb she throws my way, letting her determine everything and take her time because that’s exactly what I did to her months ago. 
I deserve all of it. 
Yesterday, when she ran out of our bedroom after leaving me about to come, I almost went feral. I’m sure the growl I let out could be heard by the whole pack, and, yet, this naughty, perfect girl in front of me just giggled. 
My cock is raw from how much I’ve been stroking it. I’ve already come at least fifteen times since she left our room all cheerful—completely unfazed—until now when I finally asked to talk to her out here in the garden after breakfast.
Even after jerking off several times, the urge didn’t go away, in fact, it only got worse because my cock simply needed her, not my stupid hand.
Her scent changes, and before she can open her mouth to say anything, I can already smell what it will be. My eyes tighten and I clench my hands into fists. Yet, I sense no scary feeling about me coming from her.
“I’m so tired, Ethan...” I want to speak, but I let her. “It’s not just your lies that are keeping me from accepting whatever this mate bond is.” Her eyes fill with tears. “What I went through with Logan... I don’t want to relive it all but know that it wasn’t easy, and I’m not talking about the kidnap part. Although now I feel more relieved that he’s no longer alive, for years, he was everything to me... I want this with you, but, I—” Little Dove swallows hard, a tear falls. “I’m a broken thing, Ethan, I—”
I cup her face between my hands and lean in so the tips of our noses are practically touching. “You are the most beautiful female I have ever seen,” I murmur firmly. “You are *not* a broken thing. You’re far from that. You’re perfect. You’re so fucking perfect, Little Dove.” I lick my lips. “Every time I look at you—your strength, your aura—I want to pin you against the closest wall of this packhouse and fuck you until neither of us can stand up. I want to throw you on my shoulders and take you to some deserted island where there’s nothing but sand and sex and food until you lose that haunted look in your eyes, love.” My lips graze hers as I speak. “And I don’t give a fuck what I have to burn to make it happen, either.”
She sucks in a breath. Tears threaten.
She looks at my eyes for a long moment and when I think she is going to stay silent, she repeats herself with a broken voice, “I’m so tired, Ethan.”
The last time she told me she was tired, I promised her she wasn’t alone anymore and that I would marry her to protect her. Now, I just want to kick myself for not keeping my word. Goddess, I deserve the worst.
Still, I say, “I got you.” And this time, I am not letting her go. “I got you, my Little Dove.”
She flies towards me, snuggling close as I place my arms around her once more. Against my chest, she says softly, “I’m beginning to see that.” 
Oh, thank fucking Goddess!
“Good. Then you’ll understand me when I say I will never make the mistakes of my past again. Not for any reason. Also, I’m not letting you out of my sight ever again. I don’t care if you like it or not. But I don’t let go of what belongs to me. I did it once with you and have been living with the repercussions of my mistakes ever since. I swear to Goddess, I don’t ever intend to do it again. You got me?” 
She nods against my chest. After sniffing, she confesses, “I just feel so... protected around you. Safe.”
“Good. Because I’d rain down every bit of my power on those that would do you harm.”
I’m not prepared for her next words. 
“If we didn’t accept the bond...” She clears her throat, letting go of the hug to look at me. “Would it eventually die?”
Her question settles like lead in my chest. 
Looking into her eyes, I whisper, “Not for me.” 
Then, without warning, her lips touch mine, and my heart jolts at the soft sensation of them. My Little Dove wraps her arms up around my neck, and my stomach does a weird fucking flip. That’s it! She’s accepting me! I deepen the kiss, parting her lips with my tongue. 
She moans as I devour her mouth. I hope she feels everything my heart is feeling. Pure, hot possession. Obsession. And when a whimper of need escapes her lips, I immediately drag her to my lap and devour her the way I want. It’s more than a declaration. 
I draw back. I’m panting slightly, and she is breathless. 
Moon Goddess, help me. She’s beautiful. “You’re mine.”
She smiles. It’s so infectious that it makes me smile too. “That was a very interesting way of showing that.” 
My heart hammers in my ears. I have forgotten how to breathe. 
Softly, she confesses after catching her breath, “I’m tired, Ethan.” Her frightened eyes soften. “But I want to figure all of this out.” 
“So, this means—” 
“I’m saying I love you, Alpha.” 
I am speechless. I struggle to gather a single logical thought until she opens a smile. Goddess, that fills me with so much happiness I think it may burst out of me.
The only thing I can think of is pressing my lips against hers, my hands cupping her jaw again. Instantly, my Little Dove responds.
She’s here, and she’s mine. 
She’s safe, and she’s mine. 
I catch myself repeating these words in my mind to finally convince myself of my luck. 

🐺 🐺 🐺
***Alicent***
His long-fingered hands are so warm against my face as he kisses me.
I didn’t mean to ask—didn’t want to ask—that question but I did. I needed to make sure about this bond one more time.  
After speaking with Vi and Maggie and uncovering so much about Ethan that I never knew—and now that I’m finally *allowed* to know—I’m even more convinced I’ve made the right decision. 
It wasn’t easy to make it because I learned the hard way that I shouldn’t settle for crumbs. 
I deserve more. 
I now accept Ethan not only because he is my fated mate but also because he gives me more than he did before. So much more. 
I’ve hated seeing the pain etched across his face, but before accepting this bond or his love, I needed to learn to love myself first. And now, I feel in my heart that it was the best thing I did. 
After everything he shared with me on this bench—how the curse came to be, the years he suffered under it, and how it was finally broken? And after all he’s done for me, pouring his heart out and declaring his feelings?
What could I say to that? 
There wasn’t a response in the world that would do it justice. That’s why I kissed him and accepted this. Because no man has ever made me feel as safe and loved as Ethan does. 
What is it about those fingers touching my face that makes me nearly melt into a puddle of goo on his lap?  
Pulling back a little bit, Ethan says against my lips, “Kral wants to meet you.”
I take a sudden sharp breath inward and abruptly stand up before him. “What?”
To my surprise, Ethan chuckles. “He won’t bite you, Little Dove.” A smirk plays on his lips as he rests both arms on the top of the bench before saying, raising a single brow. "*Yet.*"
I open my mouth. Someone may think it’s because of horror from a certain distance, but the reason is far from that. It makes me extremely uh, *curious* to know what it would be like for Ethan to mark me. From the smirk on Ethan’s face turning into a mischievous smile, it doesn’t seem like he’s been tricked.
I take a step back. “I don’t know if I’m ready,” I say, stroking my arm. I turn my back to him, looking at the mansion that I’ve discovered they call it ‘the packhouse’. I’m a little wary of meeting his wolf, so I confess, “You said it was Kral that kept you from having anything with me...”
“That was before.”
“I don’t know, Ethan...”
“Baby, he’s dying to meet you.” Ethan snickers in my ear as he tags my elbow in his large hand. 
How he’s gotten to me so quickly is a mystery. No, wait. He’s a werewolf. I look out one of the windows in the packhouse and spot Kelly looking down at us before she leaves the window. She arrived yesterday with Jordan, earlier than Vi said they would. I’ve been avoiding her ever since, I still feel uneasy around her.
“Little Dove?” 
“Yeah,” I whisper back, not taking my gaze off the window, even though she’s not there anymore. But I don’t miss how Ethan plays with the ends of my hair like he can’t control or prevent his own hands from touching me.
“Kral couldn’t be more anxious in my mind. Trust me! The wolf is whining more than a puppy,” he says, his breath tickling my ear. I can hear the smile in it. “You don’t need to be afraid, baby.” 
“I am not,” I lie.
“I know you are,” he says with his deep voice close to my ear, making me bite my lower lip.
“And why are you so sure of that?”
“For many reasons, but mainly because of the rapid beating of your heart.”
I face him abruptly. “What?”
Ethan grins. “We werewolves can hear your heartbeat.” 
“Crap.” I pale. “Why didn’t you tell me before?” I blush, remembering all the times my heart’d raced and I’d pretended I was unfazed.
“All of our senses are sharper than humans, Little Dove,” he smirks, looking at my lips. Then, seeming to remember something important, he says. “Just so you know, Az’s getting better at identifying what scents match which emotions. Our son will be a very powerful Alpha when he’s older.”
I can’t help but notice the proud way he says about Az. My heart warms every time he calls Az his son.
“Wait.” I frown. “Does that apply to smelling things? Like you have a super sense of smell, too?”
His small grin widens. “Why do you ask, Little Dove?”
That bastard! He knows why!
“Well, when you told me you could smell my...” I clear my throat. My face flames as I realize what I’m saying. 
Oh God. 
Why would I bring up the fact that I’d gotten aroused and that he’d smelled it? 
*Why do you hate yourself so much to the point of putting yourself in this situation, Allie?*
He said he could smell my arousal, but I thought it was just a figure of speech. However, as Ethan’s gaze on me darkens, nostrils flaring, I realize he was actually telling the truth.
His tongue runs across his full lower lip. My heart picks up speed, and I dart my gaze to the ground, looking for any way to redirect this stupid conversation. 
But Ethan leans in a little closer and cups my face. “That isn’t all,” he says. “I can read you by your aura, too. It’s like it alone has a pull on me. But your scent... Your sweet scent alone...” His eyelashes lower, and again, his face moves a bit closer to mine. Only inches are between us now. “Makes me go feral,” he murmurs, his eyes fixing on my mouth in an entranced, absent way. “You smell divine. Like the scent of the morning air as the sun rises... Clean and untainted.” 
Now I’m just jealous of the Werewolves. Their strength, their speed, their power. Right now, I would have given anything to be able to smell Ethan like that.  
“Really?” I murmur, my voice breathless than I’d intended. “You smell all of that?” 
“Sometimes it’s a bit difficult to concentrate on just one scent, and if the scent is too strong, it can end up hurting our noses, but your scent...” Ethan bites his lower lip with a small smirk, and I know exactly that he’s holding back, just for my sake because my blush can’t get any more intense than it already is. He clears his throat. “I could never have enough!” His eyes lift to mine. 
Even though I don’t sense all these things like he does, I can feel all his feelings exposed in his eyes as his black eyes locked to mine, his pupils expanding in a way mine can never.  
Before I can claim his lips again, I hear Ethan growl, closing his eyes before he gently but quickly pulls me behind him.
Then I hear Vi’s voice, “Oh my Goddess, stop being so territorial! I need my best friend to help me pick out an outfit for later.”
“She’s mine, and all I can hear you saying is that you’re going to get her out of my sight.”
Stepping out from behind him, I playfully slap his arm. “Ethan!”
Vi laughs. “Why don’t you just pee on her?” Vi suggests with a beaming smile.
“Ew!” I look at the two of them back and forth. “Please tell me you guys don’t do that!”
They both laugh loudly. I groan.
“I hate you two!” I say, crossing my arms as Ethan hugs me from behind.
“I’m going to pick up Theo, Az, and Lily at the waterfall,” Vi says. She’s wearing an oversized black T-shirt that’s big enough to cover just her ass. “Do you want to come with me?”
Even though Az was grounded, I still let him go to the waterfall with his friends after breakfast because, unfortunately, my opportunistic little son convinced me after he shifted into his adorable white wolf and sulked fluffily in the corner of our bedroom until I gave in.
For God’s sake, as *a puppy’s mom*, I simply couldn’t deny what he asked.
Especially after Az said that if something happened, he would mindlinking his Pops.
My heart could not say no to his cuteness!
I still can’t believe my introverted and traumatized child is now living like a normal, happy kid.  
“No. I’m convincing Alicent to meet Kral,” Ethan tells his sister.
“Oh,” Vi makes a gun gesture at us. “Got it.”
“You’re going to go to them...” I clear my throat. “In your wolf form? I mean, are you going to shift?” I look up at Ethan for reassurance about the term. He nods with a small smile, tightening his grip on me.
“Yeah,” Vi replies, making me look back at her. “See you guys later then.”
Then, just like when I witnessed the entire Blackmoon shift, Vi turns into a huge gray wolf with a bright white spot on her forehead, her clothes tearing apart in the process. Without even looking in our direction, she runs toward the trail that leads to the waterfall like it’s the most natural thing to do.
“Wow!” I find myself saying.
“That’s Roxy. Vi’s wolf.”
“She’s so beautiful!” I admire Vi’s wolf until she’s out of sight. Turning in Ethan’s arms, I ask him, “Does it hurt? I mean, shifting?” 
“No.” He shakes his head. 
“It’s so fast!” I contemplate. “When you guys shift into wolves, do you still think the same way? How does it work? To have a wolf inside you, occupying all your thoughts?”
“Kral is nearly always on my mind. He guides me in everything. It’s hard to separate us because we are ultimately one person. Of course, there are some instincts and senses that take over in Kral’s form. The impulse to hunt, for instance, is very powerful. To chase a scent, track down someone... That’s why you shouldn’t run when you’re close to my wolf’s form.”
I can’t help the way I clench my legs, feeling a gush of warmth between them. 
Imagining him running after me and then catching me. 
I clear my throat, but I still tease, “Is it an Alpha thing?” I bite my bottom lip to contain my smile. “I should see for myself if it’s true then.”