Bonus Chapter 10

“You’re my own Moon.”
I slap his shoulder, and he smirks. “Cedar!”
“What? You’re my favorite view.”
“You know what I mean!” I slap him again, then accuse, “You read my bucket list!” I growl. “How did you find it?”
“It’s easy to find stuff when you’re snooping, sugar,” Cedar tells me with a grin. “I found it yesterday in your bedroom after you passed out from coming non-stopping in my mouth.”
I groan. “You really are the worst.”
Cedar takes something out of his pocket, and then he opens the paper with my Bucket List written on it. “Well, as far as I know, here at the top says ‘To My Fated Mate’, doesn’t it?”
I look where he points, and certainly, inside a red heart is written exactly what he says.
After I nod, he goes on, “Then it belongs to me.” Suddenly, Cedar’s voice becomes low and dark. “When I saw it... I nearly crumpled it and set it on fire at the mere idea of you having done anything on this list with that fucker. But fuck him, I don’t care! You wrote this to me, so it fucking belongs to me. Just like you do.”
“Fair enough,” I whisper, and he opens his gorgeous smile again.
Goddess... This male!
Cedar pulls me close to him. “It’s going to take me a while to check everything.” 
“What?” I ask. “What are you talking about?” 
“Your bucket list.” He takes a green marker out of his pocket and starts writing a checking mark sign on the list. “We can check off holding hands while watching the sunset. And, oh, yeah. We had a picnic.” He checks off as I stare at him, mouth open. “We also counted the stars. That was nice. And, well, I know I built the treehouse for Lily, but—”
“It counts. I’s perfect!” I cut him off. I grab the marker and mark it done. “I don’t even know how to thank you for that. The treehouse is perfect. Lily loved it. And so did I.”
Cedar smiles as if he’s just won the lottery. “We’re marking it as done, but most of these things we’ll do over and over again, sugar. Just once isn’t enough.”
I feel a little numb with shock.
“The main thing to know is I’m not leaving you, Violet. I’m here for you. I’m going to take care of you.” 
“I don’t want you to leave me.” 
“I don’t want that either. As long as I live, I want to spend it with you.” 
I lick my dry lips, and my eyes drop to my lap. “No, you don’t... You shouldn’t.” Tears start to fall. “I’m messed up, Cedar. You think we can be together, that you can fix me... That’s kind and all, but you can’t.” I shake my head, and then I blink hard. “Your-your fated mate is more fucked up than you could ever think.”
My breath catches when Cedar lets out a growl before cupping my face between his big hands. 
“I have never experienced feelings like these before, Violet. I burn for you. You’re so fucking perfect.” My eyes meet his. “I was not aware that a being could be so beautiful until I saw you.” His eyes drift down, across my revealed shoulders, then to the neckline of my dress. Closing his eyes, he takes a deep breath before ripping his gaze off there to back at my eyes. He whispers a pained curse through gritted teeth, desire pooling in his green gaze. “I didn’t know I would have a fated mate. I didn’t know I could be so lucky. But here you are! When your perfect chestnut eyes looked at me for the first time... I was done. You’re not broken, Vivi, and I don’t need to fix you.”  
“I hate myself so much, Cedar. For everything Jordan did to me. I should have known better—”
“It wasn’t your fucking fault!” Growling, Cedar snarls. “I don’t want you to ever say that again. Do you hear me?” I sob, but he isn’t having it. “Never say that again. Do you hear me, Vivi?”  
Reluctantly, I nod. “Y-yes.” More tears spill down my cheeks, sobs racked my body. 
It’s like a wall inside me has come down, allowing emotions I’ve kept trapped inside to escape. 
I cry for myself. For everything I’d suffered and lost over these years with Jordan. I cry because, frankly, I don’t know what it means to have a truly fated bond, I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’m so damn scared. 
“Oh, Vivi, have you been holding all of this inside?” Cedar asks. 
How does he understand me so well? 
The true mate bond between two Werewolves is nearly creepy. Well, okay, I don’t actually find it creepy. 
He wipes my tears away. “I know *you can’t trust* easily anymore, Violet. But I’m not going to just let you walk away. I can take care of you. All you need to do is trust me.” 
Even though he hasn’t marked me yet, I can feel in my own skin his relief when my lips touch his. 
“Thank. Fuck.” He mutters against my lips before kissing me hard.
This time, his palm cradles the entire back of my head, and for a few moments, he thumbs the tip of my ear as he devours my mouth like my body is the most perfect and precious thing in the world.
*Jordan may have broken my ability to trust, but Cedar is building it back up bit by bit with every second I spend in his presence.*
With record speed, Cedar savagely rips my dress off from my body. I gasp. “Cedar!”
But he captures my mouth again. I’m not wearing any bra, only my panties are left on my body now, which are already very, very wet.
“Anyone can walk in!” I pant. 
He chuckles, tearing my wet panties. “Sucks to be you, then, sugar.” His fingertip slowly slides between my legs, up the slick slit of my pussy.
“Oh Goddess,” I cry. 
It feels so good. Tingles dance over my entire body, and I let out a moan. 
Gone was the easygoing man; only Cedar’s deep, commanding voice remained, issuing the order, “Tell me you want me, Violet.” His finger plunges inside of me.
I cry out, the pleasure from his finger fucking me making my mind go blank. I tilt my head back, his other hand firmly holding the back of my neck. 
“Ask me for our mate bond.” 
He adds a second finger to the first, and together, they slide inside of me. My muscles tighten around them. One more plunge and I think I’ll come. 
*Really*? He wants me to think right now? Not cool.
‘Tell him, human,’ Roxy orders me too. ‘I can’t stand being without my mate anymore!’ 
“I-I want you, Cedar. My wolf wants you. We both want you,” I confess. “Desperately. So please.” I moan, opening my legs wider as he his fingers in and out of me. The Full Moon and stars shine brightly above us, making both of us feral with the pull. I look into his eyes. “Please accept our sacred mate bond. Please... accept me.”
Cedar slides his finger deep into my passage as though in reward. But then he doesn’t move them. 
“If I say yes, there’s going to be some conditions, though.” 
“Conditions?” I give him a wary look, but I know I’d agree to anything this male says. 
“No more lies. No more running away. No keeping stuff from me. No holding back or saying things are fine when they aren’t. Or that you don’t fucking mean it, Violet.” 
“That-that sounds fair,” I pant. 
“If one of us is upset, angry, or sad about something, we stay and fight it out. The months you were away... I can’t live through that ever again. I mean it.” 
“Neither do I.” My vision blurs with tears forming. But I reach up and cup the side of his face. “I’ll accept any condition you say. Please accept our mate bond, baby! Please!”
“I’ll be your husband and your fated mate, Violet. What do you say to that?” His words cause a clench and a gush of my pussy. His fingers fuck me, in and out, harder and faster now, and I’m gasping and rocking my hips, stealing every ounce of pleasure he’s offering me. 
“Oh, Cedar. Please. Yes! I want all of that.” 
Right at this moment, I don’t give a shit if anyone shows up here. 
“Do you know why I’m telling you to ask me this? It’s not to belittle or humiliate you, but because, Violet, I can tell you’re not used to asking for what you really want. And we have to work on that, sugar. I know you’re traumatized by everything that happened with that fucker, but I need you to tell me what you want. I want to hear what you want. *Trust me* that nothing you ask will make me leave you.”
I cry with pleasure and the sudden emotion in my chest. Still cupping the side of his face, I ask, “Cedar, are you sure? I can be a lot...” 
“You’re damn right, I’m sure.” 
I let out a deep breath. I’m not still sure it is the right thing to do, condemning him to live with me but I know I can’t let him go. “Why?” I whisper. “Why do you still want me?” 
“Oh, Violet.” Cedar chuckles, that wicked smirk playing on his lips. “Don’t you get it, sugar? You are in it for me. There is not a rule I wouldn’t fucking break. A line I wouldn’t cross for you.” He finds this perfect spot inside me and rubs his fingers over it. 
“Oh. Oh. Oh!” I moan loudly. 
The impending climax takes over, becoming the only sensation in my world. Just as I’m about to burst, Cedar stops, freezing all the pleasure, stopping my climax right at the brink of orgasm. “No! Please, don’t stop.” 
“You are going to let me pamper, sleep by your side, and protect you, or so help me, Violet. I’m going to spank your ass every Full Moon for a year!” 
I stare up at him in shock. Does he just realize what he’s said? 
But as I stare at him, I spot a very real fear in his eyes, like he’s afraid I told him those things without meaning them. 
But then I think... What if I did it? I need to do better. Am I really insisting on living in the past when it is the last thing I want? When it’s causing not just me but my real fated mate such pain? 
“I’m sorry.” 
Cedar blinks. “What?” 
“I’m so sorry. I will never do that to us again. I didn’t even know you well, and I missed you so fucking much. Every. Single. Day. I’ve spent so long thinking of ways to keep everyone around me happy and safe all my life, and... it’s just... it’s taking a bit to change my mindset to where my fated mate wants to keep *me* safe, wants to pamper me... Thank you for saving me from that situation I didn’t even know I was in with Jordan. You saved my life, Cedar. I just... deep down, I feel I’m not that worthy of our mate bond, much less being pampered.” 
“Fuck, Vivi. That hurts me more than you can know.” He squeezes his fingers around the back of my neck. “Don’t say that again. It isn’t true. It’s going to be okay, Vivi. I swear, I’m going to make it okay for you, my Moon.”
His Moon. *His*.
The knot in my stomach starts to unravel at his words. “How’d you get to be so perfect?” I whisper. 
“There’s nothing perfect about me, Vivi... But I know I’ve done something right in my life to be given you as my fated mate. I’m not perfect, but I’m definitely the luckiest man I know. You own my heart, Vivi.” 
I sniffle. “Stop. I don’t want to cry anymore.” 
“You will cry, but it will be for another reason.” His fingers start to move again. Leaning in, Cedar kisses my lips as he continues finger-fucking my pussy. 
The pleasure builds once more, even more intense than before. I rock my hips faster as I ride out the first wave of my orgasm. 
“Oh, Goddess! Yes! I’m yours, Cedar! I’m yours!” My back arches, and I cry out in delight at the powerful release.
“That’s my good girl.” He slides his fingers free, and I whimper. 
I’m not ready for him to stop. But then he raises his hand to my mouth, running the tips of his fingers over my lips. I open my mouth, and he slides his fingers inside. 
I hum, tasting myself as Cedar moves his fingers in and out. 
“You’re being such a good girl for me, aren’t you, sugar? I think you deserve a reward.” 
After removing his fingers, he leans in to kiss me. “Fuck, baby, you’re too delicious to resist any longer.” 
“Then don’t. Don’t resist me,” I say, breathless. “Take whatever you need.” 
Cedar has a smirk on his damn lips as he kisses his way down my naked body until he reaches my pussy. 
Then he attacks me with his tongue, flicking at my clit before sucking on it and then moving his tongue lower to my passage. 
Back and forth, he goes. I’m so slick I can hear the wet sounds. Finally, he replaces his sinful tongue with his fingers, moving his lips up to my clit, and then he grazes his teeth around it. 
I tense, my hands find his soft blonde hair, much shorter than the first time I saw him. “Cedar!” I scream. 
“You’re so fucking sweet. I was right. Sweet like sugar. Come for me, Violet. Come all over your fated mate’s face.” 
I definitely do not need any further encouragement. I come so hard that I stop breathing. 
This is like nothing I’ve felt in my entire life. It managed to be stronger than any other orgasm before. 
Muscular arms wrap around me, pulling me tightly against a firm chest. I realize then that I’m crying. It’s too intense. Cedar holds me until I come back into myself. 
Stirring, I wiggle so I can stroke his hard cock. 
His breath catches. 
I love that I can give him pleasure. I try to move out of his firm hold.
I want to touch my fated mate. I need to! 
“My turn!” I say, my hand flying to open his belt.
“Hey, wait. Wait, sugar!” He holds my chin between his thumb and forefinger. Goddess! I can smell myself. “Are you all right?” His other hand wipes my tears away. 
I nod. “Yes,” I tell him breathlessly. “I’ve just never felt anything that intense before. Kind of took me by surprise.” 
“But you’re sure you’re okay, sugar?” His eyes study my face. “You don’t need to rest or anything? We don’t need to—” 
“Cedar, I want you! I’m not delicate. I’m all right.” 
Stroking my cheek, he says with a small smile. “You’re delicate, my Moon.” 
I swallow the lump in my throat in the loving way he looks at me as if I were perfect. As if I really were his own Moon. 
But I still snort. “You need to get to know me better then. I’m not as delicate as you think.” I run my hand over his huge cock again, and he hisses. He’s so damn hard! “Um, can I suck your cock now?” 
“All right then.” Cedar sits on one of the rocks near the blanket and opens his legs. He bites his bottom lips as he stares down at me before saying with a smirk and that fucking wild glint in his green eyes, “On your knees, sugar. Prove to me that you have another use for that pretty mouth other than sassing me.”