15 - Dinner From Hell

“No fucking way!” Sam yelled out loud the moment I brought the idea of the double date when I met her for drinks later that week. I never told her about watching Kyle fuck her brains out while I brought myself to a climax. It was the cocky look on Kyle’s face that had angered me even, I had no right to be me mad at her about it – so I had to make it my little secret.

“Sam please.” I pleaded.

“You want me to lie to Shawn who’s like the nicest guy on the planet.” Sam said and I sighed.

“He’s suspicious for some reason and – ”

“There’s no reason he should be suspicious?” Sam asked me.

“No of course not, but I know Shawn, he’s going to start obsessing and I can’t deal with that right now. I just don’t need that and this double date is the only way to get Shawn to forget about it and know that Kyle is off the market, he needs to see it – to hear it from you.”

“That my ex fuck buddy is actually now my dream man – ”

“Come on Sam.” I held unto her hands desperately.

“Okay let’s say I buy into your awesome idea and logic, are you sure putting Shawn and Kyle in the same room is a good idea especially with your history with Kyle. He doesn’t exactly know how things went down with you guys, how intense things got – and I’m not just talking about the sex. So much happened between you two like real stuff.”

I stayed quiet pondering over her words as they bounced off my ears unwilling to get through because Sam was right, she was always right.

“What about you Aria, are you going to be okay being in the same room as him?”

“I – I have to be.” I said.

Sam sighed with a playful eye roll and I could feel her acceptance coming through, “Fine, I’ll go along with these crazy idea but Aria remember what he did to you – remind yourself, wear it every day like a Covergirl lipstick because he’ll destroy you if you even think of giving him another chance.”

***

Later that evening, Shawn and I were seated at the fancy restaurant with my hands safely tucked in his while we waited for Sam and Kyle to arrive. I was nervous and I wondered if Shawn could tell, if he could the perspiration building on palms while he held unto them.

Soon enough, they arrived and my heart literally stopped when Kyle walked into the restaurant dressed in a fancy suit and he smiled at me and immediately all the memories came rushing back. The intense moments we had, with my legs wrapped around his torso while he drilled into me. The wet kisses that made me mush in his hands – the way he was looking at me like I was the only thing he wanted to look at.

“Hey sweetie.” Sam approached me and pulling me out of the reverie of my thoughts and I smiled her while she moved on to exchange pleasantries with Shawn and Kyle approached. He didn’t say anything but rather he stooped down to give a simple kiss on my cheek and suddenly the air around me became cold that I froze but I managed to maintain my composure and hide the fact that a simple touch from Kyle was causing goose bumps on my skin.

“So – so let’s sit.” I offered.

“Shawn it’s been ages, how have you been?” Sam said after we said in a bid to lighten the tension that was slowly brewing over our heads.

Shawn offered an easy smile, “Been way too long Sam, how’s work?”

“Work’s good, a little mental but nothing I can’t handle.” she said.

“So Aria,” Kyle started, and my chest constricted, “I never thought you’d leave New York, you were always so excited about the city.”

“I was getting bored of it.” I offered, a soft smile on my face and avoiding his eyes because I could see from the corner of my eyes that he was looking directly at me and willing me to look at him, but I couldn’t dare to.

“Or you were running.” he said and this time I actually looked at him, my brows raised in confusion but he raised his hands in surrender as the tension begin to spread amongst us and both Shawn and Sam had their eyes on us now but I cleared my throat in disguise.

“We should order something – alcohol maybe,” I signaled the waiter with trembling hands, “Shots of tequila please.” I said to handsome looking waiter with a mullet and a nose ring and yet again Kyle wouldn’t let me have it.

“Why? You used to love coke and rum, what happened?”

I was going to speak but Shawn cut through and facing Kyle instead, “Well I guess her taste has gotten classier since you.” he looked straight at Kyle and Kyle smirked in response.

“Enough about Aria – so Sam how did you guys meet?” Shawn said.

I sighed in relief as Sam was more than happy to fill the air with details that never happened, and I shot her a grateful look, “Well we ran into each other in France about a year ago and it got pretty heated from there – ”

“I mean she couldn’t resist my charms.” Kyle cut through, just after a swift shot of tequila, “We took a ride on my motorcycle at sunset and it was pretty much a done deal then.”

“I never knew you still rode the motorcycle.” I offered unconsciously suddenly remembering the first time Kyle took me out on a ride, my hands wrapped tightly around his torso and unwilling to let go. I had closed my eyes, with my hair whipping in the wind and Kyle had told me then.

*“Open your eyes Aria – don’t be scared.”*

But I didn’t.

“You were scared of it.” he said, “But does Mr. Lawyer here ride a motorbike? You know what Aria, I never pegged you to date a lawyer, I thought you liked bad boys?”

I locked eyes with Kyle but it was only for a moment, I just had a second to chirp in, to defend Shawn before Kyle was ready to strike again and that was when I realized this whole dinner was a big mistake.

“I’m very happy with Shawn, happier that I’ve been my entire life.” I said and then I stood up abruptly from my chair.

“If you’ll excuse me, I need to use the restroom.” I left the table and went straight to the restroom with my legs shaking and unable to work properly. I stared at my reflection in the mirror with drunken eyes and a conflicted heart. There was Shawn, beautiful Shawn with curly hair and innocent brown eyes who was in no doubt in love with me, and there was Kyle who had been my life with piercing blue eyes and a magnetic aura I still couldn’t deny because he ignited feelings I was sure I had buried deep down.

“Fuck!” I yelled, running water over hands in a bid to dissipate the anger and confusion that was festering within when the door flung open and Kyle walked in, I stared at him in surprise.

“What the hell Kyle! What are you doing here?”

“Just hear me out Aria – I’m sorry, I was being a dick but I can’t help it when it comes to you.” he said attempting to move closer to me but I only stepped back.

“You must be out of your goddamn mind Kyle, you can’t be here.” I sidestepped him attempting to leave but he grabbed my hands.

“Aria – ” in the loving and manipulative way that he does and it felt like a flood gate had opened within me and I turned around swiftly, pulling my hands from his.

“Don’t call my name like that,” I yelled angrily, “You broke my heart Kyle, you broke me, completely shattered me when I needed you most so don’t you – ”

My voice cracked and I struggled to keep my composure, to not let the tears from my eyes at least not for him, “Don’t you dare call my name like that.”

“I’m here Aria, I’m here. I want to do better.” his eyes held a promise I wanted to believe but the wounds still felt fresh, because he ripped out the band aid by showing up at my presentation.

“It kills me every day, how things ended between us but I swear I’m not the same person I was. When I walked into your presentation that day and everything came rushing back. Why do you think I moved to California, because I still – ”

“Nobody asked you to do that Kyle.” my voice was frantic, desperate and angry with every emotion I felt directed at him but he grabbed my hands instead pulling me closer to him. I felt so weak that I couldn’t resist him anymore, I couldn’t felt him so I allowed myself in his arms, I allowed his sweet scent to waft through my nose. I allowed him to hold me and piece back the parts of me that he had broken.

“I wanted to,” he said and I shook my head.

“You shouldn’t have.” then I pulled away from him but I held his stare. His eyes drilling into mine, holding a promise that set my soul on fire, that set my body on fire with his hands wrapped around my waist, I felt invisible. It felt like it was just us, no one else.

“I wanted to Aria, how could I not? It’s us - ”

“Because you still what?” I interrupted him remembering his statement before I cut him off and I could feel the words at the tip of his tongue but I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear, I didn’t think I’d be prepared for the aftermath of that statement, whatever it was going to be.

“Because you still what?” I repeated – desperate.

“Because I still – ”

I didn’t hear the end of that statement even though he said something because someone had barged in and it was Shawn, immediately I pulled away from Kyle but it was too late. The hurt and disappointment on Shawn’s face was blaring that he stormed out immediately.

“No Shawn, wait – ”