CHAPTER FORTY FIVE

Jwala:

In the evening, I woke up and found myself hugging him so tight. He slept beside me, and I don't know when I hugged him. A knot tied by Aadarsh is hanging around my neck making me guilty for betraying Agni. I woke up and removed it from my neck.

Why did I do this? Why am I so foolish to marry someone else betraying my husband? How can I make Agni accept me as his wife? I didn't deserve him. I lost the right to be his wife. I should stay away from him.

He woke up and looked at me and mangal sutra.

"Are you an idiot? Do you know the value of Mangal sutra? Is it a chain or a toy to remove as if you want and marry whenever you want? If I know this, I would have never married you."

"Your parents got arrested for marrying you with Aadarsh without divorce. Even Aadarsh is in police station now for marrying my wife without divorce."

I looked shockingly at him.

"Agni, my parents didn't do anything. Please leave them."

"Shut up. I filed a complaint on you too for marrying Aadarsh. If you leave my house, you will get arrested, and they will bring you back to me. Your parents deserve the punishment" he said.

"Ok leave it. Is the body so sore? How are you? It takes a long time to heal."

"How do you know that I am there?"

"I planned to leave India. But, I felt to see you for the last time. I went to Aadarsh flat; I observed only Aadarsh coming out and going in. I didn't find you. I abducted him through my men and asked in my style. He said everything. Immediately with the help of my friend in the police department, I traced that fellow and talked about money to save you without creating a nuisance and immediately."

"Get fresh up; I will bring juice for you."

I nodded and tried to get down from the bed, but Agni lifted me in arms and dropped me in the washroom. After getting fresh up, he placed me on the bed giving me a towel and everything I need. Then he made me drink juice.

He took his dress and changed his clothing to go out.

"Where are you going now, I mean it's evening," I said slowly.

I was scared. Till now I didn't believe Agni. But now I am trusting only Agni and unable to confide in anyone else. I am scared to know that he is going out.

"Do I need your permission to go out? Just shut up and focus on yourself. I may go anywhere or to anyone. I may even go to a lodge... "

"Good night. I feel sleepy," I said and turned another side to sleep.

"Have your dinner and sleep."

"You no need to worry about me, go anywhere, do whatever you want," I said.

Suddenly he turned me towards him and made me sit on the bed. His grip on my neck is not tight, but it's still hurting due to bruises.

"I need to worry about you, and I am the only one who bothers about you, Jwala. Don't make me lose my patience and start hurting you again."

"It's hurting," I said in a low voice.

"What?" He said and immediately removed his hand from my neck.

"I am sorry, I forgot..., " Agni said kissing the injury on my neck.

"It's hurting, your love and care are hurting me," I said hugging him and crying hard.

He broke the hug and cupped my face. He wiped my tears.

"I want to kiss you," he said.

I closed my eyes to allow him to kiss you. But he didn't.

"How can I kiss you. With which right? How can I kiss someone's wife?"

"With which right you brought me here? With which right you saw me nude and kissed my forehead?"

"As you are my responsibility, I brought you here. As a caretaker who nurses the injured, I cleaned your injuries. Though I saw you nude, I didn't get any feelings for you. Do you know something Jwala? In the past, when you are beside me, I always used to get feelings on you with your words, touch, with your breathing too. But now, I am not getting any feelings for you. I kissed your forehead as a friend who cares for you and to relax you assuring that you are safe" he said.

"Do you have anything to ask?"

"No"

"Why did you marry Aadarsh?"

"I thought I love him."

He chuckled.

"But you are sure that you love me. So, there's no confusion about your feelings. As far as I know about you, when you married Aadarsh, I saw hatred on me than love on Aadarsh in your eyes Jwala. I want to know the reason behind your hatred. Even when you misunderstood me and thought I was the one who sent you to the hotel, you tried to change me but didn't leave me. Then what's that which increased your anger and created hatred on me?"

"If I say you will get angry with me."

"If you didn't say, I will leave you right now and will move to abroad as I planned."

"No, don't go please" I held his hand.

"Come on, tell me the truth."

"Aadarsh showed me the photos where you are beside Vedika."

"So what? I mean I didn't get you."

"You beside Vedika on bed nude" before I complete he slapped me.

I held my cheek, but I can understand his anger.

"Are you crazy? I already told you explicitly that Vedika is my best friend and we had no affair. How can you trust those stupid pictures?" He said pulling my hair.

As already my body is sore, eyes filled with tears due to his hard slap and a firm hold on my hair. He left me seeing my tears.

"I am going; I think if I am here that may hurt you more."

"Don't leave me please, I am scared of everyone."

He looked at me.

"Except you," I said.

"You will be scared of me soon. I will help you to recover but don't expect mercy from me because I don't know forgiveness. You have to pay for your betrayal. Do you remember your last words before going to your maternal home? You lied to me saying you want to see your parents. I sent you as I trust you and there you got married betraying me. Do you know the pain of being betrayed by loved ones?

It kills us. It makes us lose hope in life and trust in people. I am rude but not cunning like you. You may think that I made you pregnant through cunning means. But, no. I realised what am I because of you. So, I thought I shouldn't lose you. You brought back the human in me with your innocence, kindness, love, and humanity.

In this whole world, I trusted only you, more than me. I thought your heart is pure and can never cheat. But, it's not true. You are just one among all those people who cheated me and enjoyed seeing my pain. You love to view my pain and if I suffer. I never knew it. You changed me into a human, and now you turned me into a beast. See what this monster with no heart will do.

Till now I had no affairs. You are the only girl whom I touched. But, from now there will be an endless number of girls in my life except you. Whenever I start keeping an affair with a girl, I will send those photos to you. Because as you know, it's my habit to make my private life as public" he said sarcastically with anger.

"Agni, please..... "

"Now I am going to a lodge where a call girl is waiting for me. I will share my experience with that girl with you after returning"

I clenched my fist hard unable to bear his words. How can he talk like that to me? I know I did wrong but imagining my husband with someone else will kill me. Wait, my husband? Do I have that right to say that he was my husband when I broke that sacred bonding? I was the one who made our marriage as fun. Maybe he too felt the same way or more than this when I married Aadarsh and went to his house. I cried without saying anything.

"Are my words hurting you? Your actions killed me. You are not able to bear even the words. Then how do you think that I can bore that pain? You married that idiot and went to his house holding his hand. If that wh*re and b*st*rds didn't come at that time, you would have given yourself to Aadarsh. Do you know how hurting it is to imagine for me? Answer me you sl*t" he shouted.

He got changed. His words too changed. I am crying continuously, but he didn't react at all.

"Sl*t is the word which suits you better. That's what you are to me from now, just a wh*re. To respect you and treat you as my wife, you didn't have knot I tied to you. From now I will call you as my sl*t" he said.

Suddenly Vedika came from nowhere and slapped him shocking me.

"Do you understand what are you talking? Mind your words Agni. Stop abusing her. Learn to respect your wife first and then point out her mistakes. You are the one who made her do all that. You tortured her; you abused her, you even made her pregnant without her notice and sent her to clients. How can she trust you? Whatever a husband does including keeping affair; a wife will forgive him when he realises his mistake and tries to change him. But, if it's a wife who makes a mistake, husband never forgives her. Why? Why can't you forgive her Agni? Society is always ready to throw stones at women whatever they do, but it's family who should understand and correct their mistakes patiently. Please understand her and heal her. Don't become one among those crowd who suffer wife for every mistake. Please Agni" Vedika said.

"I am sorry Jwala, I won't talk like that again," he said to me.

"But Vedika, I can't forgive her forever. She can stay here. I will care for her, will do everything for her except loving and accepting her as my wife. I can't do that" he said

"Agni, but" Vedika tried to say something.

"I am leaving Vedika; I didn't want to talk anything now," he said and left the house wiping his tears.

Vedika hugged me to console.

"Please don't cry Jwala. He loves you. It takes time, but I am sure Agni will forgive you one day. Try to regain his love. I know you both made for each other. As you don't know about this world, you trusted everyone. You saw the darkest side of Agni and sweetness of Aadarsh and Vigna. So, you trusted them and not your Agni. But, now you realised the truth. Try to make Agni understand that you realised your mistake. I am sure he will understand because he loves you so much. I saw how much he worried about you when he knew about your situation from Aadarsh. I saw his tears and tension for you. He can't hurt you" Vedika said to me.

Vedika phone rang. She smiled and received the call. It's Agni.

"Vedika, how is she?"

"Who?"

"Jwala, is she crying?"

"Yes, that's what you want, right?"

"I don't know Vedika. I get hurt seeing her tears, but I am the direct or indirect reason behind her tears every time. I am trying hard to control my anger but seeing her; I am unable to do that. I think it's better to stay away from her for some time."

"Avoidance increases problems Agni, and moreover she needs you at this time. Please don't be foolish by leaving her at this stage. Come back; she is waiting for you."

"But"

"More than medicines, only your love can heal her," she said and disconnected the call.

I remembered the baby. If I say about the baby now, he will torture me more. But, Agni becomes more dangerous, if he comes to know about the baby from another source. What should I do? It's better to accept the punishment by admitting my fault than hiding it.