Chapter seventy

Dallas

I felt a slight jab in my throat and it suddenly became had to breathe. I started gasping for air.

Lucien killed my mother!

Lucien killed my mother!!

Lucien killed my mother!!!

I repeated in my head like a broken jukebox. I didn't want to believe it, but a lot of things that happened after her death starts to make sense. Like how fast Lucien got rid of her things. How he never visited her grave since she was buried. How fast the police closed the case and the truck driver was given a light sentence. And every other thing I hadn't given much thoughts before. It was because he killed her.

“No, he wouldn't do that.” I half yelled, much to myself than the others.

No, I wasn't going to believe he would kill her off like she meant nothing to him. He couldn't possibly do that. I shut out the tiny voice in my head that kept reminding me of how possible it is.

“Joe has been on this case for months. He has acquired enough evidence to believe he did. I can show it to you if you'd like to see it.” Oliver said softly, his voice was so tender that I might have admired it if I wasn't so consumed by the thoughts swirling in me.

I didn't need to see the evidence. I knew deep inside me that it was true. I had seen enough evidence for the last four years, but I had chosen to turn a blind eye to them. I had been so focused on fighting the will that I didn't even stop to think about how she died.

“No!” I yelled, jolting up from my seat. I held my head in my hands, wishing the voices would stop.

I felt a tightening in my chest and I placed my hand on it. It became hard to breath an I started wheezing. I crouched down and squeezed my chest, hoping it would dissipate the pressure there.

Tears blurred my vision. I didn't even see Ethan leave the room, I only heard the soft click of the door as it closes.

Everything hurt. Breathing. Sitting. Even existing. It all just hurt so fucking much. It wasn't until Oliver hugged me tightly from behind that I realized I had been shaking. I turned to face him properly and pressed my face into his hard chest, crying profusely. I didn't even care that we were sitting on the bare floor, I just cried.

I let out four years of frustration, four years of sorrow, four years of putting up with Lucien's bullshit only to find out he was her murderer. I had been living in the same house with my mother's killer for the last four years. He had been living and walking around freely as if he didn't do anything, and I had just let him.

“I fed him.” I managed to get the words out of my mouth.

“I know.” Oliver said simply, his voice low and comforting.

“I worked so hard and brought food to his table. I fed him and his daughters for years.” I mumbled softly.

Oliver ran his fingers through my hair and placed a kiss on the top of my head. Some of the pressure in my chest dissipated and I forced myself to keep talking. I didn't know what else to do at the moment.

“Why? Why would he do that? She did everything for him. Everything. She was willing to leave everything just to be with him. She even shipped her only daughter half way across the world just to please him. Why would he–”

I couldn't even complete the sentence as I felt a huge lump form in my throat. I tried to swallow it down but it just hurts so fucking much. Oliver tightened his hold around me, but it still wasn't enough to save me from the sorrow I was drowning in.

She only wanted a family to call her own. After growing up in foster care and building everything she had from scratch, my mum just wanted a home. I didn't grow up to know my father and she never told me why he wasn't around.

I used to cry and pester her a lot. All the kids in my grade had both parents and I wanted one too. Maybe if I didn't push her, maybe if I had just forgotten about not having a father, maybe she'd still be alive.

It was stupid blaming myself, but I couldn't think clearly at the moment. The last phone conversation we had flashed through my head. I thought she wasn't going to show up at the tournament and yelled at her for always choosing the family she made over me. I hung up on her. I ignored all of her texts where she told me she was coming to Korea. The next time I heard about her was the coach telling me she had an accident.

But right now, the pain I feel in my chest was so intense, it's like losing her all over again.

“Make it stop. Please, make it stop. It hurts. It hurts so much. Just…please. I can't take it anymore. I can't… I can't handle it. I…I pushed her to remarry. She didn't want to, and now she’s dead because of me. I … I caused this. I brought Lucien into our lives. It w..as me.”

I cried harder and pressed my face harder into his chest.

I took slow inhales of his scent, hoping they'd work their magic and calm me down. Any other day, they would have. But right now, not even the strong scent of mint and sandalwood was enough to reduce the pain I felt in my chest.

I just want it to stop. The pain. The pent up frustration. The guilt. I want it all to stop.

“It’s not your fault, Dallas. Don't blame yourself.” Oliver said softly as he continued stroking my hair.

“Just let it all out, little monkey. Let it all out.”

And I did.
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After a very long time, I finally got a grip of myself and stopped crying. I was still sitting on the bare floor of Oliver's home office, my head placed on his chest. I had cried so hard that my eyelids felt heavy.

Oliver hadn't made a single complain. For someone who hates dirt, he didn't seem have a problem with sitting on the bare floor to hold me. Granted, his office was sparkling clean, but it was Oliver. I know how big of a deal it was for him.

“Hey!” I said. I sounded tired after crying for so long.

“Hi,” he said softly, his fingers drawing soothing circles on my back.

I raised my head from his chest and stared into his eyes.

“Thank you,” I paused, slightly frightened by the sentence that was at the tip of my tongue. Those three words. No, this isn't the time or atmosphere for it.

Besides, it's not like I would have meant it. I wasn't in a stable emotional state at the moment.

“I really appreciate everything you did for me.” I said instead, a tight knot at the base of my stomach, but I managed to smile.

“It's fine.” A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his lips before it disappeared.

“I would do anything for you.” He added with all seriousness.

There was some conflicting emotions in his eyes as he stared back at me. I swallowed down as the heat in his eyes bore into mine. It was almost as if he wanted to…kiss me, but something held him back.

I wouldn't have mind if he did. It doesn't matter how many times I've slept with this guy, I never seem to get enough. I tilted my head forward a fraction, but he turned his face away slightly.

“You're still buying me a new shirt though. This one is tear soaked and it's very expensive.” He said.

I blinked at his words. It took me a minute to comprehend what he said before I retreated. I let out an awkward laugh.

“Oh, don't be greedy now. You have a lot of money and plenty of shirts. I'm sure this is not a big deal.” I said and waved my hand.

“Yes, but now there's a reduction in the number of white shirts I own. How do you plan on fixing that, missy?” He arched an eyebrow at me.

His expression was hilarious that I couldn't refrain my laughter. I laughed for so long that my stomach hurts. He stared at me with a pleased expression on his face.

“That's right, keep smiling. Everything is going to be fine as long as you keep smiling.” He said and gently stroked my cheek.

I stopped laughing, but I still had a bright smile on my face. I felt so much lighter now. There was another intense staring, but I was the one who interrupted it this time.

“Alright, let's get off my floor now, shall we?” I said and rose to my feet.

He stood up after me, towering over me. I had to tilt my head up to see his full height. I sighed. I'll never get used to how tall he is.

“I want to go meet him.” I said immediately.

I knew Oliver's plans was to hand Lucien over to the police, but I wanted to confront him first. Despite how risky and stupid it sounded, I needed to confront him. I needed to know why he did it.

I already prepared a whole argument in my head Incase Oliver refused, but surprisingly, he merely nodded. He must have picked up on my emotion.

“Dallas, there's something else you should know before you decide whether to see him or not.” He said.

A sorrowful expression clouded his face in that instant and I was suddenly worried about whatever it is he wanted to say.

“Lucien wasn't alone.” He hesitated for a moment. “He had a partner. Someone you're very familiar with.”

“Who is it?” I asked, despite the nagging feeling at the back of my mind urging me to not ask the question.

But I've already had enough bad news for the day, what's more bad news? And I'm pretty sure whoever it was must be condescending as Lucien so I wouldn't be exactly pained.

The look Oliver gave me suggested otherwise. He simply pulled out his phone and showed me a video on his phone. And my world stopped.