Chapter ninety four

Dallas

I'm in love with Oliver Kang.

I've been for a long time but I didn't even realize it. I've never been in love with anyone. Maybe it was when he took me in after Lucien threw me out. Or when he got on a sixteen hours flight to Korea because he missed me. Or when he let me cry on his shoulders. Or when he did everything in his power to lighten my damp mood after the court trials.

At some point, over the past few months, the dynamic of our relationship start to change and I developed strong feelings for him.

I had always known I felt something for him, but I was scared to admit it. Scared that he didn't feel the same way. Scared that he'd reject me. But now, I couldn't be more sure. I loved him with everything in me.

The realization brought a smile to my face. I was certain that he felt the same way about me even if he hadn't said it. He'd shown me multiple times. He'd expressed his feelings through words and actions, but
I've always ignored it.

I start to wonder why he's never told me how he truly felt about our relationship. Why he ignores the topic whenever it was brought up.

“If you care about me so much, why are you still engaged to her?” I asked the question that has been bugging me for a while now.

He sighed and dropped his hands. I had an idea of what the reason was, he'd hinted about it in the past. But I wasn't going to jump into conclusions anymore. I needed to hear it from him.

“It's what he would have wanted.” He said simply.

What his father would have wanted for him. I didn't know Oliver's father enough to know if he would have wanted his son to end up in a loveless marriage. But from what I've read and seen about him, he seem to believe in love. He loved Regina so much and never hesitate to show the world.

Oliver wanted to do what he thought his father would have wanted. While his mother was taking advantage of his guilt to get him to do her biddings. Jenna was manipulating the whole thing from behind the scene. She was using him to fulfill a sick childhood fantasy of hers. The thought of it was nauseating.

“I know how insane and selfish this sounds, but I just can't bring myself to break the engagement. I feel like my father wouldn't be happy with me if I do. If I make his wife sad. He loved her a lot and she loved him too. After what happened to him because of me…” he gritted his teeth together and released a long sigh.

“Mum blames me for it and I blame myself too. I took away her life partner, it's only right I let her choose mine. It won't make up for what I did, but it's the best i can do.” he said in a somber tone.

I understand that everyone deals with grief differently, but it was really unfair to Oliver that he gets all the blame for his father's death when it should have been the other way around. I'm not necessarily assuming his parents had bad parenting skills, but if they had noticed something was off about the nanny and fired her, none of this would have happened.

Oliver had been traumatized by her, long before the kidnapping happened. But neither of them was around though to pay attention to their own kid. They let it happen, and she just turned around to blame him for something that wasn't his fault. It was cruel.

“Jenna is the safe choice. It's not because I feel anything for her. I can't even stand her presence for long. I chose Jenna because she would never expect me to be her husband. That way I'd appease my mum and still be free to do whatever I want. It's why we have the legal contract between us.”

He closed the distance between us and brought his hand to my face, he seem to comtemplate something before dropping his hands, not making contact.

“I know this is very selfish of me, but I want you with me. You deserve so much better. You deserve someone whose life isn't as fucked up as mine. You deserve someone who would be fully yours. I know I don't deserve you, but I'm too selfish to let you go. I'm not a hero who would let you go and hope you'll find someone that'll treat you better, I'm the villian who would keep you despite knowing I shouldn't. I can't afford to lose you, Dallas, because I can't imagine my life without you in it. Just please. Stay with me.”

He stared at me with pleading eyes. He looked so torn and my heart ached for him. I knew what I was getting into when I agreed to be in a relationship with him months ago. I would be the other woman in this life. But things were different then. I hadn't realize how much I loved him and how I'll do anything for him, including saving him from himself.

I will help him deal with his guilt him and free him from the shackles of the people using it against him. I'll make sure I expose Jenna for who she really is. And make him see that what happened to his father wasn't his fault.

Because this man saved me when I was drowning in my world. He rescued me and brought me to shore. He stood by me when I had no one. He believed in me when I lost faith in myself. He was there for me.

And now, I would do the same for him, because I love him.

“You're not gonna touch her ever again, not even by accident.”

The image of her clinging to him flashed across my mind and a new wave of anger surged in me. I quickly quenched it before it could rise further.

“I'm never going to give her the chance to be close enough to do it.” He said firmly.

“I’m not saying we should broadcast our relationship all over the media, but I'm not going to be hidden. I refuse to be your secret girlfriend or the other woman in your marriage.”

“The people that matters already know about us. I don't care what anyone thinks. You were never a secret, Dallas.”

It was true. Our relationship was never hidden. His friends knew about me. I can assume Regina knows too, which means she now despise me more than before. And now Jenna knows too.

I caught a glimpse of him curling his fingers into a fist. He was itching to touch me. I fight back the smile that tilted the corner of my lips. I love that I have that effect on him.

“Don't hide from me ever again. I want to know everything about you.”

I need to know everything if I want to succeed in this.

“You already know more about me than anyone does.”

“I want to know more. Full disclosure.”

“Done.” He said without hesitation.

“I'm serious, Oliver. Don't hide anything from me.”

“I can never hide from you when you're the only person who sees who I am at my core.”

My breath caught and I became speechless. I had no idea what to say after that.

I closed the distance between us and wrapped my arms around him.

“I'm never leaving you.” I said softly and meant it.

I couldn't survive without him in my life. He's become a major part of my life that I can't afford to lose. I don't want to imagine a time in my life without Oliver in it.

He placed his hand on the small of my back and pulled me closer to him till we breathe in each other's air.

“I don't deserve you, but I'll keep you anyway.” he whispered, his lips inches away from mine.

“You mean so much to me, Dallas. So fucking much.”

I swallowed hard, itching to say those three words, but I didn't want to push him away when he's finally decided to be open with me.

“You mean so much to me too.” I said instead.

I drew his lower lip in between mine, kissing him slowly. He parted his lips slightly, giving me the entrance I needed. We kissed slowly, taking our time to savor the taste of the other. The kiss was slow and sensual. It was everything that needed to be said and more. It was perfect.

When we finally broke the kiss, our eyes shone with admiration for the other. He brushed away the strand of hair on my face and tucked it behind my ear.

“And FYI, I've never been a fan of heroes. I happen to like the villains better.” I smirked.

His eyes darkened with lust. Without warning, he captured my lips in a feral kiss, shutting down everything in me and making me surrender to him.