Chapter 55

I just watched my son play barbie, I did nothing but watch my son. I can see the joy in Zari's eyes, we are in the living room of the mansion and until now Zarius is still not coming down.
"Mama when can I see Dada? I already missed them ..." Zari stood beside me while holding her barbie.
"If your papa's agree to visit Dada." My son was upset. My phone rang correctly. Shit! I forgot to text Dash! Zari also looked at the caller, I saw a lot of text and calls.
"Mama is that Dada?" Zari asked, I nodded as his smile widened. I answered immediately.
"Where the fuck are you, Vien ?!" He immediately opened up to me, your grandfather was very angry.
"Dada!" The other line immediately fell silent when Zari shouted happily.
"I found her, Dash ..." I hugged Zari, while the phone was between us.
"Dad I missed you! Don't be so mad," said Zari. The other line is still silent.
"Dash ..." I called.
"Damn." I heard he was cheap. "Thank God you found her, but that Vien is still not enough for you to leave suddenly." I frowned,
"Zari's here, lolo Dash ..." I can imagine his cold aura at this moment, he hates it when I am calling him Lolo Dash.
"Mama is Dada's mad on us?" Zari whispered to me.
"Dada are you mad daw?" Ani ko.
"Where are you two? I'm gonna fetch you both." He said with authority, I would have answered when someone entered behind us.
"No one's going home." He said coldly, I know that voice.
"Papa!" Zari got up from me and went to her dad.
"I-we'll talk later, Dash ..."
"Tsk." That was his only answer before I turned off the call, I stood up and faced the father and son. I couldn't help but blush when I saw that he was wearing a boxer shorts and a white shirt. So I immediately averted my eyes.
"Papa, can I just see Dada?" He was our son, but he was looking at me, badly. I'm just playing with my fingers because I can't look at him, because my heart is still beating.
Gosh! Stop beating so fast! He might hear! That's right Ysla!
"Don't want your Papa?" He averted his eyes from me, his voice became soft. I feel like a stump at these times that I don't know what to do, we're the only ones in the mansion now because they went home Shaina was picked up by Chaos, Chaos was even surprised when he saw me.
It was already six o'clock in the afternoon, and only now did I feel hungry. Maybe I'll just send for Dash after I talk to Zarius.
"Its not that po, papa." I saw Zar's smile again at what his son said, as if I was amazed.
Gosh, Ysla stop fantasizing about her! The man has a girlfriend!
"But you missed your mama's boyfriend right?" My forehead wrinkled, when did I become Dash's boyfriend? But instead of telling the truth, I just kept quiet. That's where he's good at, judging without immediately finding out the truth.
What's the point of defending myself if he just won't believe me.
"He's not mama's boyfriend Papa! Mama's still single!" I immediately closed my eyes in embarrassment at what my son had said. Wtf.
"And you believed them?" Zar asked, when will a to tease ?!
"But he isn't!" I saw him kiss Zari on the cheek.
"Are you hungry already?" My eyes widened when he looked at me while asking that.
"Ah h-no ----" I didn't finish what I was going to say when he turned to Zari to add what he said.
"Zari?" You fool Ysla! You answer the answer you are not asked! I almost slapped myself, where are you! I hope the earth eats me!
"Yes papa, but I think mama's hungry too." They both looked at me, I felt joy in my heart when I saw both of their faces, Zari's really the girl version of Zar.
Zar just shrugged and took my son to the kitchen. When they disappeared from my sight, I just let out my breath.
"Gosh!" Why did I forget to breathe?
Even though I was hungry, I still went to the kitchen just to talk to Zar, I can't sleep here anymore because he won't let me. I will talk to him if I can visit my son again tomorrow.
I told Dash to pick me up later,
I caught up with the father and son, Zari was in the high chair while watching Zar doing something in the sink. Zari tells a story and Zar responds happily. I don"t know if I will disturb them or not.
"Mama come here please!" We straightened up and slowly entered the kitchen, especially since I felt my knees tremble the moment Zarius stared at me.
"Mama, are you hungry?" Zari hugged me around the waist.
"H-no son ..."
"You eat too." I was surprised by what Zar said.
"Papa's right, mama!" Zari pouted.
"N-no ... N-I need to go home too, Dash will pick me up." I told him, I saw the tension in his jaw at what I said.
He turned to look at what was being cooked.
"Mom, you're going home ?!" I nodded to Zari. Then turn back to the backward Zarius.
"P-can I p-go again tomorrow d-here?" I hesitate to ask.
"Mama, don't go home! Just sleep here please ..."
"I can't, son ..."
"Let your mama go home Zari, so she could have spend time with her boyfriend." Suddenly Zar promises.
"Please Papa, stop Mama! I want to sleep with her." I saw tears dripping from Zari's eyes so I immediately hugged her.
"Ssshhh stop crying baby, mama will be back tomorrow ---"
"Even if you don't come back." Zar suddenly groaned but I just ignored him.
"Mama has no clothes here, I'll be back tomorrow mama promises." I wiped the tears from his eyes and then kissed him on the head.
"B-but I don't want you to go, mama." Me too, son.
"Zari, mama will come back okay? I know Lola will only sleep mama then when I wake up tomorrow I'll go right away, is that okay?" He nodded slowly. I took a deep breath and kissed my son again.
"Let me talk to your Papa, just a moment." He nodded.
"Can we talk?" He turned to me, he was still cold in his treatment of me. He said nothing but went straight to my son.
"We'll just talk, wait me here okay?" Then he kissed my son and left the kitchen. So I followed until we reached the living room
"What?" He asked. I can see he doesn't care what I say.
"I-I just want to say that s-please allow me to see my son. Please, don't take him away from me." I bowed, I no longer knew why I was still embarrassed.
"Isn't my son a hindrance to you and Dion?" I immediately looked up at him.
"Zari has never been a hindrance to us, Zarius. Whatever you think about the two of us, I don't care about that, just don't touch Zari." I heard her breathing.
"You're so defensive, I also don't have a pack if you really are ----"
"If you don't have a pake, why do you ask a question and you always insert it into the conversation then ?!" He looked at me coldly
"Because Zari's involved, and my daughter Zari, I don't want her to think that she has a broken family. Aren't you ashamed? You're making the flirtation obvious to the child ----" I immediately landed on her palm. He's overdoing it! He is trampling on my dignity so badly!
"What right do you have to tell me that ?! Am I interfering with your girlfriend's life? Don't be clean because you're the one doing that to both of us! That's right, you're doing too much to judge my person. You don't know the truth, you prefer what your eyes see to knowing the truth! " I was breathless when I said that, I could no longer stand the judgment he was throwing at me.
"Wow I'm still really? Who left? Who went for another man? Who received money just to leave me?" I couldn't stop myself from crying in front of him, he stepped on my personality too much.
He doesn't know what I went through in the past year and then what he is criticizing me for now is wrong. I couldn't see anything on his face when he saw me crying.
"Y-is that the reason you know for leaving you then?" I almost whispered. She moaned.
"Don't go back to that ---"
"But you're the one trying to come back!" He did not answer but averted his eyes.
"Stop throwing me your false accusation Zarius, you don't know the truth."
"Why don't you just tell the truth then?" I didn"t answer, why would I say that? I will let him know his mistake and marealize all the false information he is throwing at me.
I swallowed first and faced him again.
"I hope this is our last fight, you yourself said don't go back to the past. So I'm begging you, give Zari back to me. I'm not depriving you of always visiting my son. I know I made a mistake before. I didn't tell you, but please Zari is all I have now. " He just looked at me, saying nothing
I turned to him, grabbed my pouch from the couch and left. I was surprised to see a woman standing in the double doors of the mansion. He averted his eyes when our eyes met.
"Sherina!" I heard Zar harvest. When I got my gear I went straight to the exit. I just passed the woman, she's still wearing her uniform.
"You're thinking wrong ..." I hid on the side to hear them.
"I didn't think of anything else, and I heard everything." I could hear the modesty of the woman's voice.
"Fuck, I'm sorry. I was just mad, sorry baby ..." my heart seemed to break when I heard Zar's greeting.
"Are you okay, p-but she's right with Zarius. She's the mother of your child, give her a chance to be with your child. We know she made a mistake but you see she raised your child well, it's not right Give her a chance, how would you feel if Tita Aleja was treated like that by Uncle Janmyr? " I was happy with the woman's reason.
"I know, I'm sorry baby ..."
"Tomorrow when he comes here, I want you to be sorry! You did something wrong!"
"Alright, if that's my baby's wants. Thank you I love you. Thank you, Sherina for trusting me. I love you so much."
I suppressed the softness of my knee, along with the pain of my heart. No more, it's okay to rely on her Ysla! You heard and you saw that he loved someone else!
It's sad to think that he doesn't say that to me anymore, the pain is pain. When will it stop? Isn't my misfortune in life over?
Even though the footsteps were heavy I forced myself to leave. When I came out of the mansion, I saw a man leaning against the car while looking at me.
I turned to wipe the tears from my eyes first and slowly walked towards her. I forced a smile in front of him
"Where's Zari?" He asked.
"B-I'll be back tomorrow, come on?"

"Where are we?" He grabbed my arm.
"S-let's go home first, I've already said goodbye." I was about to board when he stretched my arm again. I was surprised when he hugged me, that's when all my feelings came out. As well as my moaning.
"Tell me what happened?" He said affectionately as I felt him caress my hair.
"A-the s-sick pain ..."
"What is it, please? Its about Zari?" I shook and hugged him even more. I want to tell him that I still love Zar so much and I continue to depend on him. But what can I do? It's too late.
He already loves someone else.
Kim was right, I was never his rule.
We only have a child but that doesn't mean that I will end up with him til the last.
I'm not the first, am I the last?
"Ssshh stop crying ..." he promised affectionately.
Ayoko na, tama na Ysla. This is probably the time to forget to move on as well. You see, he's been moving on with you for a long time, right?
I let go of Dash's hug and faced him, he raised his right hand to wipe the tears from my face.
"Do you like me, Dash?" I boldly asked him,
"Yes, Vien." There was no answer in my eyes.
"Since when?" I whispered.
"It's been a long time, Vien first."
"But when we first met, b-I was pregnant. H-aren't you even naturnoff?"
"Why would I? It doesn't matter to me, Vien. I know that I treat you differently, I'm becoming rude. But that's the only way I can see for you not to notice me, because I know you love someone else ... "Gosh! That's right Lani.
"But why me?"
"Do I need to have reasons to like you? It's not hard to like someone like you, Vien. I can't be the perfect guy that you want or I can't be Zarius, but I promise I'll make sure I 'll be the better guy for you. I'll wait, Vien. "He raised his hand to caress my other cheek. My heart is also beating for Dash but not like Zarius.
When Dash is by my side, everything becomes okay. I calm down, he was always there for me. He didn't leave me, even though there were neglected jobs, he didn't leave me. When I was still pregnant with Zari, she didn't complain every time I asked her to look for me.
Every morning that I puke, she is always there.
Dash is a serious person and rarely smiles, but when he felt Zari kicking my thigh, he looked like Zari's real father and even put his ear to my thigh. He even sing ABC song while facing my tummy.
He always cooked, wash my clothes etc. And even though I'm disgusted with the way he looks, there's nothing wrong with him. He always understands me.
So why not just him, Ysla?
Why don"t you teach your heart to love Dash?
If my sacrifice to Zarius was so great then, it wouldn"t be able to match Dash"s sacrifice that Zarius never did.
"Dashiel, thank you for everything. There are no words to thank you for everything you did for me and for Zari. I want to give you a chance, please take this pain away. I want him to disappear from my heart until it's just you I think. Please, can you do it for me? "
"Gladly." He said and smiled.
I couldn't stop myself from squatting and kissing her on the lips. And I even managed to hook my arms around his neck to kiss him hard.
It's up to you, at these times. I will gamble my heart, it is enough to hope for someone who is loved by others. It's not hard to love someone like Dash.
Starting tonight, Dash will be my everything. No more evening stars or moon.
Gradually we let go of our kiss. Both of us felt sorry for each other.
Dashiel was holding my both cheeks.
"Promise, I will erase him from your heart as long as you just let me love you as I slowly take your heart. Let yourself fall for me, Vien. Stop hurting yourself, I will wait for you." I slowly nodded and turned a blind eye to what he said.
He's right, it's been enough for a few years that I relied on people that I have never been able to trust. The hope that I will come back is enough, I know he is very angry with me and his suspicion is wrong. But I made up for all my mistakes as I sacrificed everything. He has reached all his dreams now.
It doesn't mean that we are destined children, sometimes we just have to accept the fact that we just met but were not destined.
Maybe, I just accept our fate. Even if I'm not his last, or he may not be my end game, I know God has a plan for everything.
It is enough to explain to the person whose brain is closed to know the truth, no matter what I do to cleanse myself with him it cannot be changed that he loves someone else. I'll just be happy for him.
He has Sherina now, and I can see that Zarius loves him very much.
"Thank you Dash, let's build new memories. I also promise, from now on I will forget him. I will take him out of my heart,"
"Don't promise, Vien. Make it happen." He whispered, I nodded. He leaned his forehead on mine.
This night, I am finally letting you go Zarius. Be happy.
I am finally letting my evening stars chasing his beautiful moon. Hoping that one day we crossed our evening night again under the beautiful stars, maybe I may not be your rule and end game. But I would bring all the beautiful memories that we shared together before.
You will always be my beautiful mistake, a lover, a memories, my star.
And my favorite Melody that completed my songful soul.
The Stone heart of her
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