18. Caleb

**Caleb**

Although I am mad at how Red used me earlier in the kitchen, I am happy that she accepted me. I wish she would have accepted me because she wants to be with me and not because she wants to use me to forget that bastard. But if this is the only chance I get to win her I am going to take it.
I know it won't be easy to win her heart, but I have an entire month to make her fall for me.
While I think for a few moments, Red shifts uncomfortably on her feet as she looks at the rug.
"Red," I say softly. "What's wrong?" Red shakes her head and doesn't look at me. "Do you regret it already?"
"No! It's not that!" Red says but still doesn't look at me.
"Then what's the matter? Why do you refuse to look at me?" I insist.
**'You are so dense,'** Raven says. **'It's because you said she has to have sex with you!'**
I knew I should have not brought that part up but I wanted her to know that I want everything with her. But only when she is ready for that.
*'I am not going to jump on her like some beast that can't control his urges!'*
**'I know that! But you need to explain it to her!'** Raven growls at me.
I look at Red and extend my right hand. I see some blood on it, probably from that motherfucker that dared to show up in my territory knowing too well what he did to her. I wipe the back of my hand on my jeans, trying to clean it away.
"Sit with me on the sofa," I tell her. "I want to talk to you."
Red inhales deeply but she nods and we sit on the sofa one next to another. I angle my body so I can look at her and she does the same. I take her left hand into mine and rub the area between the thumb and index finger.
"Caleb," Red says.
"Listen to me, Red. I would like to set some rules for us." She looks at me and frowns. "First rule is that I want you to be honest with me all the time. The same goes for me. And if I do something that makes you uncomfortable or you don't want to do tell me. The second rule is that I want you to take our relationship seriously. I would like you to think of us as boyfriend and girlfriend. The third rule is that even if I won't push you to anything you don't want but if you have any curiosity about me or you want to do something," I say and Red opens her mouth to say something but I keep speaking, "and I am not referring to sex, Red, but in general, talk to me. "In fact, I want you to forget about sex. It will happen when you are ready for it."
Red nods. "After what happened to you, did you–have you been with someone?"
"Yes," I say while I continue to rub her hand. "I dated a female for about six months. And after her, I had a boyfriend for about a year."
Her eyes go wide, "You like males?"
I shrug, "I think that love has no boundaries. So I don't care if my partner is male or female as long as we love and respect each other. And this is what I want for us–love and respect." Red looks at my face and frowns. "I am not going to lie and tell you that I love you. There's no love between us, not yet. But I want you to know that I like you, a lot. I am also curious about you and I can hardly wait to get to know you better. So I would like us to concentrate on trust and respect. And getting to know each other better. What do you think?" Red bits her bottom lip and looks at our hands. She nods. "Look at me," I say and she looks at my face. "Red, I want you to look into my eyes."
She shakes her head, "I can't, Caleb."
"You can. I don't know what they told you in your former pack, but I want you to look into my eyes and–" Red stands and she fists her hands. "Did your former Alpha do something to you that left you with another trauma?"
She inhales deeply before speaking."It's not that."
I want Red to tell me what's the problem but I don't want to insist.
"I have a problem–a condition. I can't– " Red says but stops talking.
I stand up and put my hands on her shoulders. She stiffens for a moment before relaxing. "You can't what?"I ask while I rub her shoulders.
"Caleb, I haven't told anyone this before, because I was afraid people would make fun of me. My former pack already said I am cursed and I knew they would say it is a punishment from the Goddess."
"Red, look at me," I say and remove my hands from her shoulders. I wait until she turns around and looks at my face. "I already told you are not cursed. Selene is not a cruel Goddess. I want you to know that I would never make fun of you. I want to know why you think you can't look into my eyes but I won't force you to tell me the reason."
She inhaled deeply before saying, "I have something called prosopagnosia or face blindness."
I frown because I have never heard of this before. She is not blind, but what is she trying to tell me? I think hard for a few moments, meanwhile, she chews her bottom lip.
"You can't see faces?" I finally ask.
"No, I can't. I don't have a problem seeing everything else. Except for the faces of people."
"Well, you are not missing much with me. I am ugly," I say and she frowns, not knowing if I am telling the truth or if I am lying. I smile. "But it's a shame that you can't see how beautiful you are."
Red licks her lips, and I want to taste her. "You think I am beautiful?" she asks me.
I look ar her face. Not only that she is beautiful but there is something else about her. Something I can't explain. I felt it the first time I touched her. It's like there's something dormant inside of her. Something that feels a lot like– I shake my head because it can't be. What are the odds, anyway?
Her green eyes shine with curiosity and intelligence and I can hardly wait to get to know her better. I want to know everything about her. From her favorite color to ther favorite food. Well, the color I already know. She does not like pink and she is fond of dark colors.
And those sinful lips of hers are begging to be kissed.
But what gets me the most is her scent– apples and caramel. She smells so damn good I want to eat her.
**'Eat her out, you mean,'** Raven comments.
*'Raven!'*
He chuckles.
"I don't think, Red. I know you are very beautiful," I say honestly.
Red bites her bottom lip, "But the other day you said I am not your type."
"Let's sit again," I say and wait for her to sit down before joining her on the sofa. "Forget about the other day. To be honest, I don't have a type. And I love how you look. You are perfect the way you are."
"I am not perfect," Red says. "I know what I look like. And I am not referring to my face, since I can't see it but I have seen in the mirror how thin I am."
"Hey," I say. "For me, you are perfect. And if you ever forget it, I am going to remind you." I change the subject because I am curious about her face blindness. "I have never met someone like you, that can't see faces. It must be hard."
"I have Safia that helps me and I rely a lot on my scent," Red says. "Being a werewolf helps a lot."
"I bet it does. But is there any way I can help you?"
She shrugs, "I wish it were. But don't worry about it. I had always had it so and it is normal for me not to see people's faces."
I make a mental note to look for info about this condition when I have some free time.
Curious to know more about her, I ask, "What do you like to do in your free time?"
"Well, I didn't have that much free time, but I used to draw," she says in a sad tone. "Sometimes I would read."
"Why don't you draw anymore?"
She chews her bottom lips for a few moments, "I don't have the energy to do it anymore."
I would love to see her draw and I hope that one day will start drawing again.
"What types of books did you read?"
"Whatever I could get my hands on, but I prefer romantic books."
I make several more mental notes.
"How about music and movies?"
Red frowns, "You ask a lot of questions."
"I want to know everything about you. What are your dreams or hopes. What makes you happy. I want to know how to make you laugh. I want to chase away the sadness you have in your eyes."
Ever since I found Red I have never seen her smile. And those beautiful green eyes of hers are sad all the time. It is as if she has lost all hope of ever being happy.
Red sighs, "Caleb, I don't know how to be happy. I don't even remember when was the last I felt happy."
You and me both, Red.
**'Ask her about Safia,'** Raven says.
I am about to ask Red about her wolf when my mobile rings. I fish it out of my pocket and answer without looking at the screen.
"Caleb speaking," I say while my eyes are on Red.
"Jordan has to stay in your pack," I hear Tatiana telling me.
I stand up fast and walk towards my desk, "What the fuck, Tatiana?"
"Listen, Caleb. I have been seeing things and–"
"What things, Tatiana? What does that fucker have to do with anything? And forget about him staying in my territory! That won't happen!"
I hear Red gasp and turn to look at her and I make her a gesture with my hand letting her know she should not worry.
"Terrible things, Caleb. He has to remain in your pack."
"Why?" I growl at her.
"Stop growling at me wolf-boy! And he has to stay there because I say so!" Tatiana snaps at me.
"Damn you, Tatiana! If I have to see him day after day I will end up killing him!"
"Kill him and Rain will die!"
I froze, "What?"
"I can't tell you more, because I don't have all the details. But I had two visions–in one Jordan was not in the pack and Rain gets killed and in the other Jordan is there and he ends up saving her."
I pace around the office and growl as loudly as I can, "Who?"
"Stop growling!"
"Who, I asked you!"
"I don't know, okay? That's what I am trying to figure out. And Caleb."
"Yes?"
"Please be careful. I have seen you back in the dungeons."
Raven howls in anger in my head. "Never again, Tatiana! I would rather die than go there again!"
Red gasps behind me and I close my eyes. Fuck!
"You won't die, Caleb. Because now you have a new reason to live."
I open my eyes and turn to look at Red, "You are right."
Tatiana chuckles, "I am always right. Remember what I told you. Jordan has to stay in the pack."
Before I can protest some more, Tatiana hangs up.
I feel so angry and I grip my phone so hard until I hear a loud crack.
I look at it. Just fucking great!
I make another mental note.
"Caleb? What's wrong?"
I sigh and look at her. "Red. That motherfucker has to remain in the pack. For the moment."
Her scent changes in the next second and I can feel she is panicking.
"No! He has to go!" Red says with a cracking voice.
"Breathe! You are panicking."
"You don't understand. I can't see him daily! I just can't! Please, Caleb! Make him go!"
**'I am going to rip his troath if he goes anywhere near her!'** Raven growl.
*'You and me both!'*
I move fast behind her, grab her hands, cross them around her chest, and put her palms over her shoulder. She automatically starts tapping her shoulders.
"Please! I can't do it!"
"Breathe!" I say in a firm voice.
But Red's panic attack gets stronger and she starts rocking back and forth.
"Breathe, Red! Now! At the count of three! Nod if you can hear me!" She nods. "Good girl! One, two, three!" She sucks in a big mouth of air. "Good girl, Red! Kept it in until I count to ten, then you can let it out!"
I start counting while Red keeps rocking on her heels.
Fuck Jordan! Fuck Tatiana! And fuck my big mouth!
Red hadn't had a panic attack in over a month and now that this bastard is here she is panicking again. Fuck!
"Ten!" I say and Red lets out her breath. "Again!"
I repeat the technique until she stops rocking herself.
"Better?" I asked her and she nods. "Look at me," I say and wait until she feels comfortable to turn around. I cup her face with my hands, and she flinches. "I won't hurt you, Red. Relax," I say and moments later I feel how she relaxes her body. "Listen to me, Red. I won't let that fucker close to you." She closes her eyes and a tear falls down her cheek, then another followed by another.
I wrap my arms around her and she buries her face in my chest.
"It's going to be alright," I tell her. "Trust me." It takes a while until she nods.
When Red stops crying, she tills her head and looks at my face. "I would like to go to my room."
"I will walk you there," I say.
I have a lot of stuff to do in the office. Elton is going to be released from the clinic today. But everything else can wait. Red is more important.