17.

Arlon's POV

He did not expect me to start this conversation. He did not expect me to be so desperate to find out. But I am. Something is off about the boy, and before I start to train with him, I want to know what and who he is. I do not care if it is bad, if he is someone I should kill. I do not care if he is not supposed to be here, or if he is my enemy. I will train him nonetheless. I just have to know.
“What? How do you want me to find out? I don’t think- Chay.” Connie understand before he can finish his sentence. I nod at him before sitting down in front of my desk.
“I saw it in his eyes when I picked Elai up. He knows something.” I tell Connie. I know he gets shy when he’s with Chay. Especially when it’s just the two of them. But he has got to do this for me. We have got to figure this out.
“But don’t you think Chay would tell you if he knew something? I mean.. he’s quite the loyal friend, right?” Connie believes in Chay a bit too much. I do not blame him; being in love is difficult and blinding. I know this all too well. “I don’t want you to feel bad, but Chay seemed quite fond of Elai.” I hate to say it, because I hate the look it puts onto Connie’s face. I don’t want to see him sad, I don’t want to watch him lose his chance. Connie has had a crush on the alchemist for so long now, but it has always stayed unanswered. It is painful.
“He’s known him for.. how long? A month now? You can’t fall in love with someone that quickly, right?” I want to say he’s right, and that he probably isn’t in love at all. “They spent every day together, though.. like. Constantly.” I was with Eryx every day, too. Not in a very nice place, but still. He made the dungeons seem like a place I could be happy in. he made me forget what my mothers had done to me.
“But what if he doesn’t want to tell me? If he truly likes Elai, then he won’t just spill it.” Connie puts a frown on his face and walks over to the desk, sitting on top of the wooden material with a sigh. I look up at him. “Steal his potion. Put it in his tea. Job done.” I have seen what the truth potion does. It will be easy to make Chay tell Connie.
But my friend does not approve of this method, as I had expected.
“He will never forgive me for that.” He wouldn’t. I know.
“Hm.. have you seen Elai in the days I was out?”
“Not really. He prefers dinner in his room and I think he sleeps through the rest of the day.. very lazy.” He probably has his reasons, but for now, Connie’s comment makes me laugh.
“I only saw him when I introduced him to Quinn.” I haven’t seen Quinn in years, but I do know he makes some of the finest make up ever. I usually stack up when my birthday is close. “So he hasn’t seen Chay yet?” It has only been five or six days since I took him in, if I remember correctly. But if they are as close as Chay seemed to think they are, he will want to see him.
“Nope. No Chay.” Connie does not want to go on about whatever they have.
“Then lets invite him over. He needs to trust us.” He already does, but not on the Elai spectrum. I know him well enough to understand that he thinks I’d execute Elai for the littlest reason.
“If he sees that we’re, you know.. alright with Elai, he might spill.” I do not know if I can act such a thing out, but it is worth a try. “He just needs to see that I won’t kill him. No matter what.” There are some worst case scenarios that will leave me no other choice, but I’m pretty sure they can’t be reached. Connie lets out a soft hum, and I can feel that a question is burning in his throat.
“What?” I raise an eyebrow at him.
He shrugs. “Would you?”
He asks as if he doesn’t care. As if it is an unimportant question. Even though it is not. It is much more than that.
“What?” I play dumb.
“Kill him. Would you kill him.” It is not a question anymore, yet is still requires an answer. I swim through the thousands of answers I could give him. I could lie or I could tell the truth, but I do not know what is true and what is false. I do not know if I would kill him. When I was younger, Eryx taught me that even a tiny mistake, would be reason enough to kill someone. A traitor is a traitor, even in the smallest manners. I believed him back then, and I followed those words for years. Now I’m not sure I can stay on that path anymore. He is dead, after all. I have to try and walk on the path of my own words.
“I don’t think so. He’s got to have a very good reason for me to kill him.” I wonder if he does. But what reason is good?
“Hm. Good. I am glad to hear.” Connie ruffles his hand through my hair, and I understand why. If I was the same person as I was when Eryx was still by my side, I would’ve answered differently. ‘It is what Eryx would want’, I would have said. Connie would’ve shaken his head, and that would be the last we’d say about it.
It is a relief I am not that person anymore. But it hurts to not know who I am instead. Connie and I both let out a deep sigh. “I wonder what you’ve gotten yourself into, Lo. If Elai isn’t who he says he is, he is a big fucking threat.” I see through everyone’s lies, but I cannot see through his. Connie is right. If Elai is anything else than a raider, there will be a problem. And I don’t know if I will be able to take that weight on my shoulders. I don’t know if I could make a decision a king would make. It is frightening and disturbing, but there is no other way around it.
“I will figure him out.”
What is it about you that interests me, Elai?