Chapter 136 - I love them all

**Zandras pov**

In all the versions I tried to alter my vision to, I came to the same conclusion, this was my last day of life. Without the dagger, I was bound to Ambrogio and our fates went hand in hand. If I died, he would be fine but not the other way around, and that was the problem. Hope was the other obstacle, I know she would do anything to keep me safe, both her and Luna, and the price would be too high. The baby’s life was so much more important than my own. Bottom line, we were going into battle and me and my soul mate were not going to get out of there alive.
Zara was a wreck, for hours I had listened to her insecurities take her over, she was one of the best witches I knew, if only she could stay away from dark magic that is. Nevertheless, according to herself, she could now do nothing. I went through the easy stuff like naming ceremonies for the wolves, pairing ceremonies for those who found their mates, swearing into the pack for newcomers. We talked about history a lot, we visited Aayla and swam together in the lake. It was very important to me, to see that the lake accepted her in some way, that it would take care of her as it took care of me. Only then did I know she could take care of the pack in my place. When we finished swimming I could see her new energy and knew I had my answer.
“I want to be buried here, with Aayla...” I caressed the familiar inscriptions on the tree with my fingers. Zara had tears in her eyes when I met them.
“Is there really no other way? The Gods must be able to do something?
“The Gods won’t do anything, the Mother shows me what will happen through my visions, it’s her way of giving me a chance to change what will happen. But I can’t change this, all possible exits would be too costly.“ I took her hand in mine and squeezed it gently.
“Zara…I know I’m asking a lot of you, but I dare not entrust Luna’s baby to anyone else…if my suspicions are correct, the baby will be very powerful, being Luna’s true daughter and having the magic in her blood from Callum’s bloodline…my bloodline…Someone has to watch over it, make sure it chooses the right path.”
“It? Haven’t you seen if it’s going to be a boy or a girl yet?”
“No, I didn’t want to see and the Mother hasn’t shown it.”
“Okay...then I guess we’ll see in a few months...” She didn’t sound the least bit excited.
“And Ambrogio…what do you want me to do with him? Now that you’ve accepted each other as mates, don’t you want to be buried together then?”
“No, Aayla would never be okay with that and I don’t want to deprive his children of honoring him in any way they see fit.” She nodded quietly and understandingly.
It took a lot of persuasion to get her to stay in Great Falls while I accompanied the pack to battle. After a tearful goodbye, I took a last tour through my house. I caressed the lantern and gave it one last protection spell, I said nothing to Zara about it, it could die with me. I kissed the ground at my parents’ grave and let my tears water their flowers one last time. I stopped at the cave and after my time with Ambrogio it had lost the last hold it had on me. It’s a very beautiful cave and I got a great idea of how I’d like to see it used, something I had to bring to Callum immediately. Luckily, he loved the idea so much, he was fired up and started calling to arrange it right away. I felt sad that I wouldn’t get to see the result. I didn’t say goodbye to anyone but Zara and Callum, no one else knew about my fate and that’s how I wanted it. I still took the opportunity to talk to everyone, show them how much I loved them and how happy I was to be in their world.
As we stood in the car park outside the stadium I could feel that Callum was off balance, maybe it was stupid of me to tell him? Yet I know him, I know his reaction to grief, I have seen it several times. When his parents died, his gamma Daniel and also others who were close to him... Well, it was probably the right decision, to prepare him.
I felt him before I saw him, it was like an invisible bond that pulled us towards each other, a stubby thread that burned hot and together we were the explosion at the end. His gaze met mine as soon as I saw him, I could feel everything he was going through, the relief to see me there, the worry that I was actually there and not safe at home. The frustration that I left him when he was sleeping and the hunger to feel our lips meet. I surrendered to him wholeheartedly when he finally took me in his arms, this would be the last closeness we would have together and it was for the same reason that I decided to bury everything old last night, give into the mate bond and give myself to him. That I could help him grow stronger and win the battle until the inevitable end made it only natural to ask him to drink from me. It didn’t hurt, it wasn’t disgusting or scary, it was euphoric. I loved it, as hard as it was to admit to myself, it was the most intimate thing I’ve been a part of.
"Well, I do…you see, I’ve got a new daughter…she’s going to be strong, have a destiny to count on."
His words hit me and hugged my heart... Ana...she would wake up and her father would be dead...the man who saved her, the one who would be by her side to feed her until she grew strong. What fate was he talking about? I kept listening and heard what he was asking Hope for, he knew something...Fuck! I understood in that moment that it wasn’t Hope I was meant to protect, it was him, he couldn’t die...not yet. If I could help Ana’s tragic end to a meaningful beginning, I would do everything in my power to do so.

During the battle I thanked Mother for my clothes, I could both hear and feel how the bullets hit my coat and its hood I was wearing. I used my magic in different ways, after giving Ambrogio more of my blood when I decided to change the vision, I wasn’t that strong, but it was enough to repeatedly protect both wolves and vampires. I created shields, cornered hunters, made their weapons click, all to help maintain our upper hand. I could see Callum was hurt, I didn’t have time to protect him. Panic rose within me, I could protect the baby but what fate would it have without a strong father? I focused more on Callum, on his injury and did my best for the spell I cast to speed up his healing. Hope left him in the hands of James, then it must have worked.
“Zandra, Ambrogio!” Hope called to us and we hurried to her side. I could see how determined she was, she was going to end this now, whatever the cost. She should only know the price...I knew, and I was here to pay it.
She kicked open the doors. The room we entered was also round and large. The walls lined with bookshelves full of books and writings from all eras. And there they were, a wall of monsters, between us and the men in the room. Deformed wolves, some on two legs, some without fur, all with gaping snarling saliva filled mouths. I could see the pain in Hope’s eyes and knew it was Luna I was seeing. My beloved Luna, my oldest and best friend, my sister...how I missed her during the long periods she slept and how I longed for the day we could embrace each other again, in the Great Heaven. She who carried me on her back during our long walks, warmed me with her fur at night when the steppe got too cold. She who heard my cry when I asked for Ambrogio’s enemies to be brought to me. My green-eyed, white-furred sister. The true daughter of Mateivia and Mateus...The true mistake of the Gods, of the Great Heavens. Now she was suffering to see her children disfigured, abused, ruled by the enemy, I could feel her suffering and soon I would be the cause of her suffering more. I’m so sorry my dear friend, I promise to make it up to you when we meet again. My words were a faint whisper and not heard by anyone, had the room been quiet maybe, but Luna’s furious roar made the walls shake and the scene before us changed in seconds.