Chapter 63. Flashback

QUILL
Once again I was in the same couch with him. While we both were lying on each other. I hugging him and he hugging me back. As we both slept silently. "You are beautiful." He suddenly said something I didn't really expect to hesr from him but then he smiled and kept caressing me on my back. "By the way how many days has it been since you came here from California?" He asked me, starting yo talk after the long silence finally which we both liked rather them grumpy talking. "Hmm, maybe months. I don't remember," I told him honestly because I really don't remember it all everything just went by without me even realising about anything.
I opened my eyes when the rays in his apartment was hitting my face, while I realised I was just solely on the couch right now. And he was not here. I rubbed my eyes opening and standing up. Looking left and right towards the kitchen and bedroom but no where to be found. I walked through the bathroom as I looked around and he was not here either I wonder where did he go? I closed my eyes again and rubbed them desperately. As I came out. After ver long time I actually had a worriless good night sleep. It came out as a dream for me honestly. I didn't realised earlier but I actually needed something like this.
Anyways! I just walked around his house touching the walls and looking around all the things he has in his room. From the photo frames to the awards. Everything was extraordinary about him. All his certificates had names of course I barely know about. The awards he have received is more then the books I owned in my room. Filled with over exceptional names. The photo of royal chairs and houses. With his family or cop crew he has are more pictures then I have ever even thought about clicking with my family. He have lived like a prince. And who am I? A nothing?
I don't see at all. The point why he likes me. With his looks, his money, his academics. He can have any woman in the world for himself. What does he sees in me? To treat me well? What does he see that he takes me as his special to get himself involved in anything?
I usually would have doubted on his intentions. But right now when I am questioning this all. I am not doubting on him but I am wondering, that why in the worl? A man like him would even turn to look at a woman who is just no body like me? Why would he ever care.
I watched his childhood photo among all the photo he had on the wall, as I smiled at him. He is just exceptionally beautiful even in the childhood. In the crowd of many where he is standing. I can instantly just recognize him and just watch him. And no one else. His little smile. Which was screaming I was a polite guy even in childhood. Make me chuckle. How can he just be so perfect? And I be so imperfect.
And why the fate always unites tow poll apart?
I was just looking down when suddenly I heard a voice behind me making me almost jump out. "What you looking at?" He asked me, out of blue when I stood up and turned looking at him. I was stealing anything. Except for some glances in your past.
"Nothing, I was just looking around few pictures of you," I started to explain to him when he laughed and walked my way, "I know baby!" He said as he kept his both warm and sweaty hands from run on my cheeks and kept a long smooch on my head.
And while he did this, I regained the past in my memories.
The time,
**FLASH**
"Hey! Lets go to the Celvin's party! Please?" One of my old friend who just turned out to be betrayal asked me when I shaked my head. After keeping the books back in the cupboard. "Come on! You know it will be fun?" She asked me, when I laughed and shaked my head. "Parties are made because they are fun! That's kot the point though? Right!" I told her frowning at her, when she just sighed and looked the other way. "That's true but in order for us to enjoy it. You must be there. See you at eight at Celvin's if you won't come you are dead meat!" She yelled out. But I just sighed and sat down back on my bench. Looking at Celvin. The guy I have had crush for a whole month now.
He barely looks at me, but Jimmy knows I like him. That's why she is so enthusiastic for me to take to the party with her, anyways. I just shook my head and went down on the desk. Starting to write my pending homework I couldn't do it because of my part time at the Cafe. And while I watched the whole USB of what Jade ate before his death that we got from his body. I couldn't do my homework. I just closed my eyes.
And just kept my head down on the table. Starting up with the tears in my eyes, every time I close my eyes, I think if him.. How can he just? Its been awhile since he died but yet I can't stop dwelling.
I suddenly heard a bang on my desk, when I looked up in little surprise. "Yes?" I asked, without looking at who it was, oh Celvin.. "Hey! Quill!" He said, so sweetly. Why? Why would a perfect guy who had everything in his life from rich parents to girls around him like dirt. Talk to me? "Hey," I just slowly said back to him. When he smiled and ruffling my hair he started to walk away.
What was that? I wondered to myself. Thinking of what just happened with me here. And didn't even got the right answer. Why would a guy like him ever talk to me? He just said hey to me? He greeted me? What sad that?
His parents are doctor. Earning sums, he has good grades too. And of course killer looks, with everything. Literally everything. Why would he ever turn to look at me? Asking myself, I hide myself in the book again.
~
It was time for me to go to the party and yet I was not done with my part time job. Its been hectic lately. The crowd that come and go are too much for me to even have a break. Though I somehow managed to stick together for the long time keep working. I just went on doing it. Without any break. And finally my shift was over. It was past ten already. I don't even know if I should go now? Well my first party I am not well aware but all I know is that this kind of party lasts longer then I know. So I am sure it must be still going on. I just came out from my changing room and went out with my earphones. The worst part is. That I can't even go to house. I can only go there before five because the jeeke are yet to be come by that time.
But after that they keep pouring. So even if party is boring. I must stick there. At any cost.
I went towards Celvin's house. As before it could even arrive. The voice and crowd was already out. And I can sense from far before the party is going wild. I wish I will enjoy this. I still walked there and finally saw his house. And the public. The people on pool the loud music. The food stalll.. The drinks. The galsses and plates everywhere. Here and there. People also scattered on the ground thrown like dirt. Wow.
It was just as I imagined. I walked inside the gate. As I looked for my friend. Everywhere.. My heaf turning all the ways so that I can witness her somewhere. At least. But no where. I just went isndie the house. When the guts cheered looking at me. Why? They barely know i exist. I still cheered along with them and just kept walking ignoring them. And then I saw the bunch of girls smiling at me. Am I at wrong place? I wondered to myself. I went and finally found Celvin. As expected in bunch of girls. He saw me too and waved at me. While I just smiled and walked past upstairs. Ignoring him. Aswell.
I looked around just so that I can find Jimmy. But she was no where to be seen. I kept looking at here and there. And just watched her. Everywhere. And here I finally found her. Kissing a guy on the wall. She looked at me and waved me, so I raised my eyes. And just walked away from her. So that she can enjoy. Oh my my!
I just went on and kept looking around. And watched everything here and there. Watching others having fun. Watching the people being all chaotic with there worry free life.
Why? Why can't my life just be as simple as those. People. What do they even have to worry about in there life? Literally nothing because they all have amazing parents.
There parents pay there tuitions, they feed them they shelter them and they do everything possible for them even if that means digging hole for themselves and just crawl out in troubles. Because they are thier parents. Why I was not blessed with something like this? Was the daughter my dad wasn't even that fond of. All I ever had was my brother who too was snatched away by someone else. How can I ever have a normal life for myself?
I wondered resting on the stairs. But then I turned and walked towards the rooms. All the rooms around me with overly expensive things. Things you see in movies those rich kids have like a mac book. Airpods. I wanted to buy them but all that my left over chump changing salary allows is wired earphones. Ahh! My life sucks in the most unpleasant way and all I looked at the costly video games. And so many things. The bed. If I sit on them, I feel like I will sink down. And there I sleep on bricks in the abandoned building.
They have everything they want on the snap of finger and I have to earn every single thing thorough my struggle. Unfair and unreal and I hate it. I really wish I can just die rather then suffer.
But I can't.
"Hey! 'I heard someone behind me when I turned," Hey! "I called out when the person was Celvin walking my way. As he leaned closer to my body,"In my room huh?" He asked his face at my ears, while he started to lick them. And I starting to push him. "Hey! I am no-" I just started to explain him but he caught my butt and pulled me. I starting to push him. "Celvin!" I called out to him but he won't stop and kept pushing me as he threw me on the bed. While I sat up in the mean time and started to run away. Coming off from the bed, as I ran towards the door that he closed and came over hovering over it and smirking at me. With his lips stretched in corner on the left side.
"Why you running away goodie? Didn't you had a crush on me?" He asked, as he removed his dick and again pushed me on the bed. While I scooted back trying to run away. But then I picked his video game abd threw it on his head.
And I came out-